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Old 10-30-2001, 11:02 AM   #11
Bokken
Baaz Draconian
 

Join Date: August 28, 2001
Location: Australia
Age: 46
Posts: 708
Bokken
Climate/Terrain: Sofa
Diet: Anything within reach of sofa (has been known to consume insects)
HP: 44/80
Attacks: Spinning of mouse over head and shouting out profanities while slapping the monitor with other hand. Screams "Let me in there!!!!" on many occassions.
Rarity: Look above hehe
Group Type: Single. MUST KILL!!!!!
Spells Known: Dizzy ones
Racial Enemy: Power shortages.

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Open hells depths........come forth my servants!
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Old 10-30-2001, 11:08 AM   #12
Barb
Symbol of Cyric
 

Join Date: July 16, 2001
Location: England, UK
Age: 49
Posts: 1,150
Quote:
Originally posted by Skunk:
Your sight is nearly as fuzzy as your underwear, and the things that are certain seem more fancy than fact. As unlikely as it may seem, you have pure Budweiser coursing through your veins. You are a product of the Time of Closing, a cataclysmic period when the barmen were made flesh and forced you to stagger out of their establishments. One such Barman foresaw both the event and your inevitable attempt to return, and so took steps to prevent you re-entering. This barman strode the bar before his shift, and in his wake left a score of double vodkas at every table. They were intended to be consumed by you and you alone, sending you into a stupor from which you would not return. But you rose to counter these tyrants, and when their evil fell into your stomach, your own two fingers allowed them to rise out once more.


The Barman was Bhaal, Lord of Barmen, and you are one of his customers. You were cared for as a child by Gorion, a powerful drunk that had even more powerful friend in the form of Jack Daniels - a well known stagger merchant.
It was his influence that allowed you to spend your youth in the detox centre of Candlekeep, where the resident Doctors schooled you in your skills. Children were an oddity at the Centre, though you did have a friend in Imoen, a 6ft high invisible Rabbit. She seemed a kindred spirit, though you knew no more of her background than your own. Gorion never explained how you or she came to be there, or why you needed a padded cell...

It was only after his death that you learned the truth about your bloodline, when you were forced into a drinking contest with his killer, another customer of Bhaal. Smirnoff was this customer's name, and he had embraced his foul origins, determined to exploit them and become the next Lord of Barmen. He sought to create cocktails on a massive scale, a war of alcholic sacrifice that would prove his claim to his father's Bar. You unraveled his carefully wrought bar towel, and ultimately it was you that took his drink, sending his spirits back to the Bar. A victory of sorts...

Now you face an uncertain future. A customer of Bhaal, you have a slur that will tempt the ignorant to fear you, and the unscrupulous to use you. And always the essence of Budweiser is within, exerting its dark pull when you are weakest. Which is the greater fear: Losing your ability to speak, or losing all control of your legs?

Only Budweiser and Bhaal have the answers....
Wow, you really are strange.



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Beware Satan (My chearleading companion)



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Old 10-30-2001, 12:07 PM   #13
Caine
Elminster
 

Join Date: October 10, 2001
Location: Johannesburg,Gauteng,South Africa
Posts: 405
tHIS IS SO FUNNY,KEEP IT COMING PEOPLE,aUSTRALIANS ARE FUNNY
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Old 10-30-2001, 12:12 PM   #14
Ronn_Bman
Zartan
 

Join Date: March 11, 2001
Location: North Carolina USA
Age: 57
Posts: 5,177
Hmmmm....

Describing myself in Baldur's Gate terms
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Fresh out of the box, in need of a patch, an expansion, and a sequel

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"Your right to swing your fist ends where my nose begins."

[This message has been edited by Ronn_Bman (edited 10-30-2001).]
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Old 10-30-2001, 12:57 PM   #15
Caine
Elminster
 

Join Date: October 10, 2001
Location: Johannesburg,Gauteng,South Africa
Posts: 405
Bump
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Old 10-30-2001, 01:30 PM   #16
ReGiN
Guest
 

Posts: n/a
ReGiN (pronounced, rejgin)

Climate/terrain: Somewhere where it's cold and rains alot.

Diet: Pig knuckles, he can get very aggresive when he is hunting for food.

HP: before pig knuckle; 42/75, after pig knuckle; 80/75 + 2hp per pound of gravy

Attacks: Flying pig knuckle, Pig knuckle trap seting, he can also "tell the teacher".

Defences: Pig Knuckle burp

Rarity: ReGiN is part of an almost extinct race, there are known to be many clones though, which ReGiN has run around trying to kill....there is a movie which stars Arnold Schwarzenegger, based on these events.

Group type: he travles alone, accompanied by a cart full of pig knuckles.

Spells known: ReGiN has been known to say, "why use spells, when you can take out a man using only a pig knuckle?"

Racial enemy: people who don't like pig knuckles

Intelligence: Um....pig knuckle, anyone?

Treasure: Depends on if you like pig knuckles.



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ReGiN: PROUD MEMBER OF KELDORN'S ORDER!
 
Old 10-30-2001, 02:28 PM   #17
Morgan_Corbesant
Symbol of Cyric
 

Join Date: August 19, 2001
Location: Portland, Oregon
Age: 45
Posts: 1,224
name: Wezley

climate/terrain:any (mostly cities)

dietmnivorous, preferably meat however

Hp:60/60, i just woke up

attacks: martial artist, specialized in elbow and knee strikes, and headbutts. escrima sticks, bo, and swords for my main weapons.not to mention mind blowing, ear-bleeding, brain numbing, eye-popping, hate breeding, heavy metal music.

racial enemy: racists are dumb, but i would have to say any rapper or "hip-hop" artist, or fans. gets a +4 to hit and damage vs. said "CREATURES"

groups: mostly groups of two or three

defenses: if i cant beat it, i run away.

treasure: none, i work at a grocery store, im broke!!





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Morgan Corbesant, Elven BladeSinger, Captain of the army of the Seldarine
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Old 10-30-2001, 02:49 PM   #18
Caine
Elminster
 

Join Date: October 10, 2001
Location: Johannesburg,Gauteng,South Africa
Posts: 405
Bump
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Old 10-30-2001, 02:51 PM   #19
floyd
Zhentarim Guard
 

Join Date: June 21, 2001
Posts: 306
Quote:
Originally posted by Skunk:
...Your sight is nearly as fuzzy as your underwear, and the things that are certain seem more fancy than fact. As unlikely as it may seem, you have pure Budweiser coursing through your veins..
That was pretty damn funny

Here is an appropriate smiley for that story

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Old 10-30-2001, 08:59 PM   #20
Quikdeth
Elite Waterdeep Guard
 

Join Date: October 26, 2001
Location: Bogalusa, La. USA
Posts: 9
Marty

Climate: The mean streets of Bogalusa, LA
Diet: Donuts and Bud Light
HP: 200/200 (No battles lately)
Armor: Level III vest
Rarity: So common its disgusting
Social Orgainization: Married with twin female spawn
Attacks: Glock 35, AR-15, Remington 700P, Remington 870, 37mm Gas Grenade Launcher
Spell Known: Arrest
Racial Enemy: Crack Heads, Cats, and Steve from Blue's Clues.
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