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Old 02-27-2003, 03:04 PM   #1
Beaumanoir
Iron Throne Cult
 

Join Date: June 3, 2001
Location: There is no IRL, Only AFK.
Age: 35
Posts: 4,896
Why should you be careful when washing trainers?
Ans: They might run!

Why do people like to put real fireplaces in their homes?
Ans: Because they're grate!

Why do most bands do a sound check before the concert starts?
Ans: Because they one two, one two

Which Road is made of paper?
Ans: The A4!

Which numbers never stay still?
Ans: Mobile phone numbers!

Which is the wettest part of the alphabet?
Ans: H to O!

Which animated character travels on public transport?
Ans: Bus Lightyear!

Can you name the person that gets drunk and kicks Daleks?
Ans: Dr Whooligan!

Do you know what they named the documentary about volunteer survivalists in South Yorkshire?
Ans: Doncasterway!


How are the drug related crime figures?
Ans: They're at an all time high!


How did prehistoric man fix doors to the doorframe?
He used a stone-hinge!


How is the new furniture store doing?
Ans: Sofa so good!

What did the man say to the head waiting at the bus stop?
Ans: How are you getting on?


What does Don King ask his family when he is getting ready for a fight?
Ans: Where is my Ty-son!


What happens if you don't pay an exorcist on time?
Ans: You get repossessed!


What happens if you swallow Uranium?
Ans: You get atomic ache!


What happens to children brought up in houses with two roofs?
Ans: They have a very sheltered childhood!


What keeps an eye on your property and tells the time?
Ans: A neighbourhood watch!


What should you do if you feel like a tepee and a wigwam?
Ans: You should relax because you are two tents!


What should you do if you get a piece of seaweed in your ear?
Ans: Sea-Kelp!


What should you say if someone is a Russian speaker?
Ans: Slow down!


How's an ancient weapon from Northern France like a sexy young popstar?
Ans: They're both Brittany Spears



No.... I did not make any of these up
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Old 02-27-2003, 03:06 PM   #2
Sir Goulum
John Locke
 

Join Date: February 7, 2002
Location: Edmonton, Canada
Age: 35
Posts: 8,985
Your right...those are bad! [img]tongue.gif[/img]
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Old 02-27-2003, 03:11 PM   #3
WillowIX
Apophis
 

Join Date: July 10, 2001
Location: By a big blue lake, Canada
Age: 49
Posts: 4,628
Aaargh!! Binky, put out my eyes immediately please! Some of them did get a snicker out of me though. The rest?
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Confuzzled by nature.
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Old 02-27-2003, 03:21 PM   #4
Bungleau
40th Level Warrior
 

Join Date: October 29, 2001
Location: Western Wilds of Michigan
Posts: 11,752
Those are bad enough to ask my favorite hunting questions...

First, how do you catch a unique rabbit?

And second, how do you catch a tame rabbit?

V
V
V
V
V
V
V
V
V
V
V
V
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V
V

To catch a unique rabbit, unique up on him (say it out loud).

And to catch a tame rabbit, you do it the tame way: unique up on him!

Hey, don't throw things at me! Beaumanoir started it!
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Give 'em a hug one more time. It might be the last.
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Old 02-27-2003, 03:24 PM   #5
Arledrian
Egyptian Goddess of the Dead
 

Join Date: July 12, 2001
Location: South Carolina
Age: 40
Posts: 3,771
Bag 'o shite! [img]tongue.gif[/img]
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Marvellous banter; I am bereft of ribs.
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Old 02-27-2003, 03:28 PM   #6
Beaumanoir
Iron Throne Cult
 

Join Date: June 3, 2001
Location: There is no IRL, Only AFK.
Age: 35
Posts: 4,896
Beautifully summed up there Aledrian
I found those ones quite funnt actually Bungleau [img]tongue.gif[/img]
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Old 02-27-2003, 06:21 PM   #7
Kakero
40th Level Warrior
 

Join Date: March 24, 2002
Posts: 10,215
eyup, have to agree.
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Old 02-27-2003, 07:23 PM   #8
wellard
Dracolisk
 

Join Date: November 1, 2002
Location: Australia ..... G\'day!
Posts: 6,123
Please post a government health warning before you post anything as bad as these again [img]graemlins/blueblink.gif[/img]
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fossils - natures way of laughing at creationists for over 3 billion years
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Old 02-27-2003, 07:54 PM   #9
SecretMaster
Apophis
 

Join Date: October 19, 2001
Location: New York
Age: 37
Posts: 4,666
I think you've just made me lose my taste for jokes.
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Old 02-28-2003, 08:40 AM   #10
Mojo
Elminster
 

Join Date: July 17, 2002
Location: Aberdeenshire, Scotland, UK
Age: 37
Posts: 451
Good God! Whatever happened to humour?
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