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Old 12-17-2004, 07:17 AM   #1
johnny
40th Level Warrior
 
Ms Pacman Champion
Join Date: April 15, 2002
Location: Utrecht The Netherlands
Age: 52
Posts: 16,977
Santa Clause - Chris Cringle - St. Nicholas - Para Noel

Are these the many names for an innocent old man who brings presents to children around the world...or are they the names of a serial holliday stalker - spying on your children?

My evidence is as follows:

The song "Santa Clause is Coming to Town" holds all the key evidence:
"You better watch out" - That's a direct threat if I've ever seen one.
"You better not cry" - Another threat
"I'm telling you why" - Explanation of the threats
"He's making a list, and checking it twice" - Has all his victims listed
"Gonna’ find out who's naughty and nice" - Truly a sick individual
"He sees you when you're sleeping" - Either through video surveillance or from his own eyes. Surveillance cameras have been found hidden in victims homes...we know they belong to him because they have tinsil wrapped around them - which seems to be his calling card.
"He knows when you're awake" - Victims have claims of being followed by a older, fat man with a big white beard.
"He knows if you've been bad or good" - A journal of the suspect was found containing detailed reports on his victims...this guy seems to enjoy commenting on everything the victim does throughout each day.
"Santa Claus is coming to town" - Another threat, though is is encrypted, my sources tell me that his use of the word "town" actually means the victims home.

So there you have it. The evidence is still coming in, but at this point, that's all I can reveal to the public.

There have been no arrests so far; so all I can suggest is that everyone keeps their doors and windows locked and covered, buy a bug detector to check for any installed surveillance devices, and if you have a chimney, seal it off somehow!

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Old 12-17-2004, 07:20 AM   #2
TheGodThatFailed
Drizzt Do'Urden
 

Join Date: March 18, 2004
Location: Where silent gods stand guard
Age: 27
Posts: 699
LOL!!!! Nice one, Johnny
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Old 12-17-2004, 08:01 AM   #3
Vaskez
Takhisis Follower
 

Join Date: April 30, 2001
Location: szép Magyarország (well not right now)
Posts: 5,089
Hmmm personally, I think it's getting boring reading "jokes" about yet another thing that's meant to be innocent being concluded to actually be sleazy/corrupt etc. (Have read a few other jokes along these lines recently). Why do we always have to try and find something dodgy in every message? Cos we're sad people with nothing better to do...? Hmm, maybe [img]tongue.gif[/img]

not picking on you johnathan, [img]tongue.gif[/img] just generally saying, knowwhatI'msayin?
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Old 12-17-2004, 08:04 AM   #4
Hivetyrant
Jack Burton
 

Join Date: August 24, 2002
Location: Brisbane
Age: 31
Posts: 5,401
I knew it!!!
Vaskez is the old guy in Johnny's post!!!
And now he is trying to defend himself!!!
I mean, how on earth did he know that Johnny's name was Johnothan!?!?!?! [img]tongue.gif[/img]
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Old 12-17-2004, 08:06 AM   #5
Vaskez
Takhisis Follower
 

Join Date: April 30, 2001
Location: szép Magyarország (well not right now)
Posts: 5,089
Yeah my white beard almost reaches the floor. Try looking at photos on Stealthy's, detective dip$hit [img]tongue.gif[/img]
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Too set in his ways to ever relate
If he could set that aside, there'd be heaven to pay
But weathered and aged, time swept him to grave
Love conquers all? Damn, I'd say that area's gray
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Old 12-17-2004, 08:07 AM   #6
Sigmar
Unicorn
 

Join Date: May 17, 2001
Location: Gibraltar
Age: 31
Posts: 4,240
I like it. *places bear-trap in the fireplace*
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Old 12-17-2004, 08:08 AM   #7
Hivetyrant
Jack Burton
 

Join Date: August 24, 2002
Location: Brisbane
Age: 31
Posts: 5,401
How do I know that's really you in the photo's??? Hmmmm? [img]tongue.gif[/img]
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Old 12-17-2004, 08:24 AM   #8
Stormymystic
Knight of the Rose
 

Join Date: April 8, 2003
Location: Arkansas
Age: 42
Posts: 4,442

I was looking through there, and I found this [img]graemlins/wow.gif[/img] I guess we now know the truth....


sorry, could not resist it
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[url]\"http://stormymystic.deviantart.com/gallery/\" target=\"_blank\"> [img]\"http://img92.imageshack.us/img92/3968/stormyvx6.jpg\" alt=\" - \" /></a>
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Old 12-17-2004, 08:31 AM   #9
Hivetyrant
Jack Burton
 

Join Date: August 24, 2002
Location: Brisbane
Age: 31
Posts: 5,401
Quote:
Originally posted by Stormymystic:

[img]graemlins/imnotworthy.gif[/img] OMFG ROFLMAO That is great stormy!!!
I was going to do that, but you beat me to it!!
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Old 12-17-2004, 08:36 AM   #10
johnny
40th Level Warrior
 
Ms Pacman Champion
Join Date: April 15, 2002
Location: Utrecht The Netherlands
Age: 52
Posts: 16,977
Quote:
Originally posted by Hivetyrant:
I knew it!!!
Vaskez is the old guy in Johnny's post!!!
And now he is trying to defend himself!!!
I mean, how on earth did he know that Johnny's name was Johnothan!?!?!?! [img]tongue.gif[/img]
It isn't, it's Johannes Antonius, i'm Catholic, see ?
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