WAAAY Off Topic Poll - All are invited: Best and Worst Pick-up Lines

I was tempted not to answer this, as some of the lines I have used will alienate every female member and have me banished from the forum. In the far and distant past, after much lubrication, I was prone to cutting to the chase shall we say, with smart-ass one liners. This generally had one of two responses, either she slapped me for my cheek, or she laughed and I then had this niggly doubt she was a little cheap. This is incredibly chauvinistic I know, but I was young. I have met all my long-term partners when I least expected it and without using any line.

Generally, I am afraid to say, that being yourself is best, as otherwise she may like the image you portray and not you as a person. Long term this will only result in heartache. Speak from the heart and be sincere but above all be funny, as this breaks the ice. As to the worst line I have used and actually worked which is printable on this forum: ' I have tried hard to ignore you as I want to be faithful to my girlfriend, but I give up as you are so beautifull' Yes I know it's crap and corny but it was exactly how I felt when this beautiful girl sat next to me in a club. I think she realized it was from the heart and we had an immediate chemistry, probably the only time I fell in love at first sight. The irony was I broke it off after 3 weeks because I was getting extremely fond of her and she had a fiancee who was in the Navy, so I felt that she would dump me on his return. With hindsight maybe I should have beeen bolder, but I also felt guilty about my girlfriend, who I soon broke up with because it wasn't as good as with the other girl.

A lot of rambling but basically speak from the heart and not the groin and try to be funny but in a natural way.

PS I am not proud of my infidelity or my behaviour as a youth so please forgive me ladies

[Memnoch]

Yorick: and the second part of your line would be:

"No? Actually you must have misheard me. What I said was that you look fat in that dress!" (just kidding!)

[Hellfire]

well this is the eternal struggle of good vs evil, right.i well tell you that bars and clubs are not really a good place to use "lines"because she probably won't hear you just kidding ,as much as you don't want to hear this, but you should be yourself just try talking if she talks then she is interested you don;t need one liners just be bold and not an asshole women like confadence,not egos be a man and don't look desperate basically what i'm saying is act like you do here ,out there

Honesty is the best policy. I don't really need to use pickup lines. I just tell them what I think and how I feel.

I do know of some, just to put bait down and see what happens. A variation on Yorick: Go up to the COMPLETE stranger look her in the eye, tilt head slightly, and say, "God you're beautiful." Then walk away and ignor them for 10 minutes. They eventually come up to you after asking around to see who you are. WARNING: this only works if you are in a room with people who know you and more importantly LIKE YOU. Enjoy

BK

[Rikard_OHF]

My cousin made up this one

Ik heet halley hoe heet ben jij
wel that actually means
My name is Halley how hot are you but hot as a verb is what you are called
his face is all blue from girls hitting her

eh thing NOT to use (more experianced with)

I know you sign (looking at her breasts) Twins
adressing her breasts sayin'Hallo you 2 are you gonna introduce me to you friend
I just read 6 dirty books wanna try them out?
Hi i'm 16 years old (in my case)
Hi i'm 50 years old (in your case)
Hiya my d*ck won't wake up you wanna give it a try
Hi why won't you buy me a drink
I know Mario Estacio
Hello let you introduce you to me
dropping a coin and lookin in her dress
Hiya i'm so drunk i even wanna Date You
Hiya i'm so drunk and i still don't wanna date you but your the only one left
You kinda look like my mommy
I wanna ■■■■ you
Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven
on a school party (not relevant to you but still)- Hi don't we go to the same school together
Wanna see my mussles
Wanna see my Fat
Wanna see my D*ck
Hihi you kinda look like a man
Don't you owe me money
I swear i'll cheat on you
Hiya your number 56 of this evening
PLEASE PLAESE DANCE WITH ME
I know Jake Gaston
I'm a Necrophile
Hiya my new one night stand

Which ones should you use
erm
??????

[Moridin]

The one that got me the most slaps:
Approach girl, with inquisitive look on your face: "Do you have any (your nationality) in you?"
IF girl says no: "Would you like some?" ...........SLAP
IF girl says yes: Great opening line......discuss topic

[Patriarch]

Ok here is the totally fool-proof way to pick up girls:
SPOILER:
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This guide to picking up girls comes in 4 easily digestable stages:
1. Choose a really corny line off this thread or just make one up- such as "You know my last bird put out on the first date" (thats always a classic)
2. Write this down on your grubby palm so as not to forget it- You'll see why in the next stage
3. Get very drunk. Not only will this improve your confidence for the big moment but also greatly improve your sexual prowess (honest!)
4. Saunter casually up to the woman in question- make sure you havent sweated the pick-up line off your hand and deliver it with gusto and panache.
Voila!

[Charlie]

My names Pinnochio, sit on my face and I'll tell you some lies......

[Moiraine]

Technically, it might be difficult to talk in that position ...

[Cloudbringer]

Moiraine! LOLOLOL!