The Official "Funniest Joke in the World"

Thoran · 10-03-2002, 11:52 AM

http://www.cnn.com/2002/TECH/science...est/index.html

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy takes out his phone and calls the emergency services.

He gasps: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says: "Calm down, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a gunshot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: "OK, now what?"

Jorath Calar · 10-03-2002, 12:32 PM

One word... LOL!!!

[img]smile.gif[/img]

Melkor, The Dark Lord · 10-03-2002, 12:34 PM

LOL Good one! [img]smile.gif[/img]

Lox · 10-03-2002, 12:40 PM

Wasn't the funniest joke in the world used by the Brits in WWII to kill entrenched Germans? I saw a documentary on it on some show called "Flying Carnival" or "Soaring Circus" or something like that.

I think the funniest line from the article is this:
"Many jokes submitted contained references to animals. Jokes mentioning ducks were considered particularly funny."

It reminds me of one of my favorites.
Q. Why do ducks have webbed feet?
A. To put out forest fires.

Q. Why do bears have big feet?
A. To put out flaming ducks.

Charean · 10-03-2002, 12:53 PM

Giggle... that was cute.

Lox - I do believe you are referring to Monty Python's Flying Circus.
Excellent show, that.
You wouldn't happen to have a bagel on you, would you? [img]smile.gif[/img]

Jorath Calar · 10-03-2002, 12:53 PM

http://static.hugi.is/stuffnfiles/wm...ets_fozzie.mp3

This one isn't bad either...

DJG · 10-03-2002, 02:02 PM

There is a massive scene on Star Trek: Voyager 7.8, "Workforce Part 1" that is absolutely hilarious!

It is where Tom tries to get a job at a bar, and he says he is the best bartender etc.

Eventually he had to say "I was fired! I need the work!".

Believe me, you see it, you laugh!

Keraptisdm · 10-03-2002, 02:42 PM

I had read that one of the funniest jokes, according to some poll, was this one by Henny Youngman.

Take my wife. Please!

DJG · 10-03-2002, 02:56 PM

My cousin says,
"The best party-introduction line is.....
MOSES!"

It does work, he tried it!

Charean · 10-03-2002, 03:20 PM

The funniest ones are true:

The following is an ad from a real-life newspaper which appeared four days in a row - the last three hopelessly trying to correct the first day's mistake.

MONDAY: For sale: R.D. Jones has one sewing machine for sale. Pbone 948-0707 after 7 P.M.. and ask for Mrs. Kelly who lives with him cheap.

TUESDAY Notice: We regret having erred In R.D. Jones' ad yesterday. It should have read "One sewing machine for sale cheap. Phone 948-0707 and ask for Mrs. Kelly, who lives with him after 7 P.M."

WEDNESDAY Notice: R.D. Jones has informed us that he has received several annoying telephone calls because of the error we made in the classified ad yesterday. The ad stands correct as follows: "For sale -- R.D. Jones has one sewing machine for sale. Cheap. Phone 948-0707 after 7 P.M. and ask for Mrs. Kelly who loves with him."

THURSDAY Notice: I, R.D. Jones, have no sewing machine for sale. I smashed it. Don't call 948-0707 as I have had the phone disconnected. I have not been carrying on with Mrs. Kelly. Until yesterday she was my housekeeper but she quit!

[ 10-03-2002, 03:22 PM: Message edited by: Charean ]

10-03-2002, 12:34 PM	#3
Melkor, The Dark Lord The Magister Join Date: August 16, 2002 Location: Kitchener, Ontario, Canada Age: 40 Posts: 111	LOL Good one! [img]smile.gif[/img] __________________ You must search the darkness, in order to find the light.<br /><br />

10-03-2002, 12:40 PM	#4
Lox Manshoon Join Date: July 15, 2002 Location: Los Angeles Age: 49 Posts: 213	Wasn't the funniest joke in the world used by the Brits in WWII to kill entrenched Germans? I saw a documentary on it on some show called "Flying Carnival" or "Soaring Circus" or something like that. I think the funniest line from the article is this: "Many jokes submitted contained references to animals. Jokes mentioning ducks were considered particularly funny." It reminds me of one of my favorites. Q. Why do ducks have webbed feet? A. To put out forest fires. Q. Why do bears have big feet? A. To put out flaming ducks. __________________ [img]\"http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v381/AngAvs/avatar6517_2.jpg\" alt=\" - \" /><br />A Thinking Monkey told me.

10-03-2002, 12:53 PM	#5
Charean Hathor Join Date: March 6, 2001 Location: Waxahachie, TX Age: 60 Posts: 2,201	Giggle... that was cute. Lox - I do believe you are referring to Monty Python's Flying Circus. Excellent show, that. You wouldn't happen to have a bagel on you, would you? [img]smile.gif[/img] __________________ And then there were 6.

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10-03-2002, 11:52 AM	#1
Thoran Galvatron Join Date: January 10, 2002 Location: Upstate NY Age: 56 Posts: 2,109	http://www.cnn.com/2002/TECH/science...est/index.html Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy takes out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says: "Calm down, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a gunshot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: "OK, now what?"

10-03-2002, 12:32 PM	#2
Jorath Calar Harper Join Date: October 6, 2001 Location: Iceland Posts: 4,706	One word... LOL!!! [img]smile.gif[/img]

10-03-2002, 02:02 PM	#7
DJG Symbol of Cyric Join Date: March 16, 2001 Location: Manchester, England Age: 35 Posts: 1,109	There is a massive scene on Star Trek: Voyager 7.8, "Workforce Part 1" that is absolutely hilarious! It is where Tom tries to get a job at a bar, and he says he is the best bartender etc. Eventually he had to say "I was fired! I need the work!". Believe me, you see it, you laugh!

10-03-2002, 02:42 PM	#8
Keraptisdm Elminster Join Date: August 23, 2002 Location: Near Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania Age: 61 Posts: 410	I had read that one of the funniest jokes, according to some poll, was this one by Henny Youngman. Take my wife. Please!

10-03-2002, 02:56 PM	#9
DJG Symbol of Cyric Join Date: March 16, 2001 Location: Manchester, England Age: 35 Posts: 1,109	My cousin says, "The best party-introduction line is..... MOSES!" It does work, he tried it!

10-03-2002, 03:20 PM	#10
Charean Hathor Join Date: March 6, 2001 Location: Waxahachie, TX Age: 60 Posts: 2,201	The funniest ones are true: The following is an ad from a real-life newspaper which appeared four days in a row - the last three hopelessly trying to correct the first day's mistake. MONDAY: For sale: R.D. Jones has one sewing machine for sale. Pbone 948-0707 after 7 P.M.. and ask for Mrs. Kelly who lives with him cheap. TUESDAY Notice: We regret having erred In R.D. Jones' ad yesterday. It should have read "One sewing machine for sale cheap. Phone 948-0707 and ask for Mrs. Kelly, who lives with him after 7 P.M." WEDNESDAY Notice: R.D. Jones has informed us that he has received several annoying telephone calls because of the error we made in the classified ad yesterday. The ad stands correct as follows: "For sale -- R.D. Jones has one sewing machine for sale. Cheap. Phone 948-0707 after 7 P.M. and ask for Mrs. Kelly who loves with him." THURSDAY Notice: I, R.D. Jones, have no sewing machine for sale. I smashed it. Don't call 948-0707 as I have had the phone disconnected. I have not been carrying on with Mrs. Kelly. Until yesterday she was my housekeeper but she quit! [ 10-03-2002, 03:22 PM: Message edited by: Charean ]

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