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Old 05-25-2001, 08:06 PM   #201
White Dragon

Join Date: April 1, 2001
Location: UK
Age: 38
Posts: 1,893
Tancred watches the ensuing carnage with horror as the Cowled Wizard burns, screaming.
"Ugh... that's horrible."
"Damn right," pipes up the sword. "Messy job, that. Disintegration, that's the way to go. Wizard messes with you, you make sure there's nothing left of him to conduct a funeral service with, know what I mean?"
Tancred gives his sword a distasteful look.
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Old 05-25-2001, 08:25 PM   #202
White Dragon

Join Date: April 1, 2001
Location: UK
Age: 38
Posts: 1,893
"Damn Cowled Wizards..."
"I thought you once were one." Tancred regards the sword questioningly.
"Well, yes... but I retired. Too damn restrictive, you know. All that power, and it just lies dormant. I just couldn't handle it. I just wanted to go out there and MEDDLE, you know?"
"I think I'm glad you're just a sword."
"In fact, I fancy a bit of meddling right now. Go on, go out there and kill a random Cowled Wizard."
"No! They'll fry me."
"I'll protect you. S'what I do, right?"
"No... they're important people to the running of Amn."
"I'm not going to kill someone because my sword wants me to."
Peeved silence.
"I won't talk to you any more unless you go out there."
More peeved silence.
"Aw, c'mon! Where's your spunk? Your zest for life?"
"Where's your respect for it?"
"I'll never protect you from magic again."
"Oh, boo hoo. Then you'll never be free of the sword, will you?"
An exceptionally peeved silence.
"I'll tell them."
"I'll tell everyone. Here. Now."
"Um..." Tancred seems to grow red at this point. "Tell them what?"
"You know what I'm referring to, Mister I'm-So-Holy..."
"Shut up. I don;t know what you're talking about."
"You do. I'll tell them all... you're a VIRGIN!"
Tancred blushes seriously, his voice becoming quieter.
"Well... um... what's wrong with that?"
"You're a cowardly flop with no spunk!"
"Shut up NOW or end up at the bottom of a lake!"
"Cowardy cowardy custard! Can't cut the mustard!"
"Go out there and kill someone!"
"It'll impress the ladies watchng."
"Everyone's looking at you. I'll bet they're wondering if you're insane or just impotent."
"Will you just shut up?"
"Go on, be a MAN!"
"Leave off, blabbermouth!"
"OOOOOOOH, look at the big man and his big words!"
"Kill a Wizard! What are you afraid of!"
"Nothing! I'm..."
"Sizing up the tactical situation? Quaking in your yellow booties?"
"You're gonna be melted down first forge I see."
"Can't face the truth? Look at the facts, boy! Damsels rescued, nil! Dragons slain, nil! Number of times you've got it on with a girl - NIL! And now you're scared to face a weed in a grey dress armed with a twig? What a hero you are, eh? I bet all the ladies just SWOON after you, eh?"
"Look, I'm a flipping Paladin of Helm! We're not supposed to... um, get it on, ALRIGHT?"
"Some excuse. Are you a man or a mouse?"
"RIGHT! That's *IT*!"
More wound up than he has ever been in his life, Tancred draws the jeering sword, pulls the bar door open so hard it almost falls off, and charges out at the nearest Cowled Wizard...
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Old 05-25-2001, 11:49 PM   #203
The Magister

Join Date: May 17, 2001
Location: Netherworlds
Posts: 100
Well well well!
i am very honoured to say congratulaions to you on your forums!
they are quite the uninteresting yet .......long and attachable!!!!
---->over and out<----

Sir Matthew the mighty and brave!!!
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Old 05-25-2001, 11:53 PM   #204
The Magister

Join Date: May 17, 2001
Location: Netherworlds
Posts: 100
Sir Matthew the almighty walks over to Drizzt and challenges him to a dual swiping his face with a leather glove.
Drizzt accepts and after a couple of hefty punches Drizzt is on the floor and an all out, everyman for himself bar fight begins including spells being cast all over the place and a couple of angry ogres withoput heads

Sir Matthew the mighty and brave!!!
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Old 05-26-2001, 12:13 AM   #205

Posts: n/a
While the bar fight is going on Angel and Reeka continue their talk about Evermeet and all of it splendors

Old 05-26-2001, 05:31 AM   #206
Horus - Egyptian Sky God

Join Date: April 10, 2001
Location: Tacoma, WA, U.S.A.
Age: 34
Posts: 2,615
Caleb decides to stay under the table and talk with the troll cook.

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Old 05-26-2001, 09:42 AM   #207
Zhentarim Guard

Join Date: March 9, 2001
Location: Cranebrook, NSW, Australia
Age: 40
Posts: 396
BAR FIGHT!!!!! Draggor leaps off his table into the middle of the fight.

Just when you thought it was safe to visit this board.
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Old 05-26-2001, 11:57 AM   #208
Lord Shield

Posts: n/a
Tiddles spots something and runs off. A human scream and vicious roaring sounds are heard. A huge hulking quadruped with armour-plated spiky hide and teeth the size of Tancred's sword comes out of the alley. He appears to have a cowled wizard between his teeth. The mage is struggling but is unharmed because of the Stoneskin. The beast lumbers off to the graveyard and digs a hole. He drops the mage in and covers it up, doing a big poo on the wizard before doing so. The mage's screams are lost as dirt falls on top of him
The beats bundles off into a side street. Moments later little Tiddles runs back out and into the bar. He starts growling at the people starting the bar fight

In the kingdom of the blind, the one-eyed man is pimp
Old 05-26-2001, 12:17 PM   #209
Jack Burton

Join Date: May 15, 2001
Location: The Netherlands
Age: 33
Posts: 5,888
Originally posted by Lord Shield:

6) There is to be NO innuendo (in any language, Link) or foul language in this bar, same as any other thread - minors read this too you know
Link walks up to Lord Shield, after a (very) long sleep in the Elvis suite of the bar. Glancing at Caleb under the table, who apparently was willing to fight Barbies right hand yesterday he tells Lord Shield:
"What did i do? I simply asked the lady if she would join! A thing she never answered to BTW.."
Lord Shield is eager to repeat line 6 of his bar rules, but Link turns away. He doesn't quite agree with him, as there were people who understood him very well. But he does not want any trouble, so he will not argue with Lord Shield anymore.
"I will respect your rules" is all Link says.

In the foul darkness one figure will emerge to save the world from evil and despair.... Light flashes as his sword comes down, and thunder rolls through the sky when he points his sword up to heaven to signal his victory....People whisper his name as he walks by, evil tries to hide as they sense his presence nearby.... His name? Link......
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Old 05-26-2001, 12:20 PM   #210
Lord Shield

Posts: n/a
That's all I ask. I wasn't angry or anything, but just be aware that minors read this site too, and some can read dutch too

In the kingdom of the blind, the one-eyed man is pimp

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