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Old 01-28-2002, 10:54 AM   #1
Arvon
Unicorn
 

Join Date: October 4, 2001
Location: Kingdom of the West,..P.o. Cynagus
Posts: 4,212
Changes in Marriage

When you are dating..... Farting is never an issue
When you are married ....You make sure there's nothing flammable near your husband...... at all times

When you are dating..... He takes you out to have a good time
When you are married ....He brings home a 6 pack, and says "What are you going to drink?"

When you are dating..... He holds your hand in public
When you are married ....He flicks your ear in public

When you are dating..... A Single bed for 2 isn't THAT bad
When you are married ....A King size bed feels like an army cot

When you are dating..... You are turned on at the sight of him naked
When you are married ....You think to yourself...."Was he ALWAYS this hairy????"

When you are dating..... You enjoyed foreplay
When you are married ....You tell him "If we have sex, will you leave me alone???"

When you are dating..... He hugs you, when he walks by you ...for no reason
When you are married ....He grabs your boob any chance he gets

When you are dating..... You picture the two of you together, growing old together
When you are married ....You wonder who will die first

When you are dating..... Just looking at him makes you feel all "mushy"
When you are married ....When you look at him, you want to claw his eyes out.

When you are dating..... He knows what the "hamper" is
When you are married ....The floor will suffice as a dirty clothes storage area

When you are dating..... He understands if you "aren't in the mood"
When you are married ....He says "It's your job."

When you are dating..... He understands that you have "male" friends
When you are married ....He thinks they are all out to steal you away

When you are dating..... He likes to "discuss" things
When you are married ....He develops a "blank" stare

When you are dating..... He calls you by name
When you are married ....He calls you "Hey" and refers to you when speaking to others as "She.
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Old 01-28-2002, 11:23 AM   #2
Garnet FalconDance
Mephistopheles
 

Join Date: August 30, 2001
Location: deep within the sylvan splendor....
Age: 60
Posts: 1,443
Oh no---wait til I tell my beloved Budha that we're doing it all wrong!!! Married all this while and still carrying on like we were only dating!!!

ROTFL......except for the dirty clothes, the 'blank stare' and sometimes the male friends out to steal me......

[ 01-28-2002: Message edited by: Garnet FalconDance ]

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Old 01-28-2002, 11:59 AM   #3
Thoran
Galvatron
 

Join Date: January 10, 2002
Location: Upstate NY
Age: 56
Posts: 2,109
I was thinking that maybe the men jokes were in retaliation for the blond jokes... but then I checked and you posted the Blond jokes too!
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Old 01-28-2002, 12:01 PM   #4
Dreamer128
Dracolisk
 

Join Date: March 21, 2001
Location: Europe
Age: 39
Posts: 6,136
Lol, this reminds me of Married with children.
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Old 01-28-2002, 01:19 PM   #5
Tarox
Manshoon
 

Join Date: November 2, 2001
Location: Nottingham, UK
Posts: 171
Haha funny stuff

Although unfortunately it appears some of it is not far from the truth judging by some of my married friends........
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Old 01-28-2002, 01:50 PM   #6
Lord Shield
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*scribble scribble* - gonna have to change these when I take over the world
 
Old 01-28-2002, 01:55 PM   #7
Sir Byronas
Mephistopheles
 

Join Date: October 2, 2001
Location: Greece
Age: 35
Posts: 1,463
LOL, LOL! That's funny!
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