Couldn''t find the joke thread...

RudeDawg · 05-03-2001, 02:26 AM

Didn't look too hard, really...

A woman was having a passionate affair with an inspector from a pest-control company. One afternoon they were carrying on in the bedroom together when her husband arrived home unexpectedly. "Quick," said the woman to her lover, "into the closet!" She bundled him in the closet stark naked.
The husband however became suspicious, and after a search of the bedroom discovered the man in the closet.
"Who are you?" he asked him.
"I'm an inspector from Bugs-B-Gone."
"What are you doing in there?"
"I'm investigating a complaint about an infestation of moths."
"And where are your clothes?" asked the husband.
The man looked down at himself and said, "Those little bastards!"

------------------

The RudeDawg
Known in these Forgotten Realms as Perin LightEyes
and my girlfriends, Pamila and Phil

Drake · 05-03-2001, 07:02 AM

LOL great LOL

------------------

Drake A.K.A. bocaj

bilqis2 · 05-03-2001, 11:05 AM

I work with older people on a daily basis... very healthy & active people all. So I thought this was funny.... don't know if you will tho!

Two elderly women were out driving in a large car. They could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along, they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red, but they just went on through.

The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself, "I must be losing it. I could have sworn we just went through a red light."

After a few more minutes they came to another intersection. The light was red, and again they went right through.

This time, the passenger was almost sure that the light had been red, but was also concerned that she might be seeing things. She was getting nervous and decided to pay very close attention.

At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was definitely red and they went right through it.

She turned to the other woman and said, "Mildred! Did you know we just ran through three red lights in a row? You could have killed us."

Mildred turned to her and said, "Oh Shit! Am I driving?

------------------

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons,
for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.

RudeDawg · 05-03-2001, 11:07 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by bilqis2:
I work with older people on a daily basis... very healthy & active people all. So I thought this was funny.... don't know if you will tho!

I work with retirees daily, they make up 85% of my clientel. This is one of their faves...

bilqis2 · 05-03-2001, 11:19 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by RudeDawg:

I work with retirees daily, they make up 85% of my clientel. This is one of their faves...

Really? What do you do? Now I'm curious.

------------------

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons,
for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.

slackerboy · 05-03-2001, 11:34 AM

check this out. it for our aussie friends.
http://news.excite.com/news/r/010503...-quarantine-dc

------------------

*Lord of the Screen Shot*
Get My IronWorks Winamp skin

RudeDawg · 05-03-2001, 12:23 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by bilqis2:
Really? What do you do? Now I'm curious.

I'm liscenced by the State of Texas in the fitting and dispensing of audioprosthetics...

I sell hearing aids...

------------------

The RudeDawg
Known in these Forgotten Realms as Perin LightEyes
and my girlfriends, Pamila and Phil

caleb · 05-03-2001, 12:33 PM

Ha I can top that I work in the kitchen of a alzheimers residence and those guys will grab your arm as your walking by and ask you to take them to their room on the second floor........BUT THERES ONLY 1 FLOOR!!!

------------------

Meet my lawyer.

caleb · 05-03-2001, 12:35 PM

Okay today at work one of the alzheimers guys was accusing everyone of stealing his hot dogs!!! LOL!!!

------------------

Meet my lawyer.

[This message has been edited by caleb (edited 05-03-2001).]

RudeDawg · 05-03-2001, 12:41 PM

A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "what is politics?"
His dad says, "well son, let me explain it this way: I'm the head of the family, so call me the President. Your mother is the administrator of the money, so we call her the Government. We're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you the People. The nanny, we'll consider her the working class. And your baby brother, we'll call him the Future. Now think about that and see if it makes sense."

So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what his father has said. Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him. He finds that the baby has severely soiled his diaper. The little boy goes to his parents' room and finds his mother sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny.

The next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I think I understand the concept of politics now."

The father says, "good son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about."

The little boy replies, "The President is screwing the Working Class while the Government is sound asleep. The People are being ignored and the Future is in deep crap."

------------------

The RudeDawg
Known in these Forgotten Realms as Perin LightEyes
and my girlfriends, Pamila and Phil

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05-03-2001, 02:26 AM	#1
RudeDawg 20th Level Warrior Join Date: April 9, 2001 Location: Dallas, Tx, USA Age: 55 Posts: 2,830	Didn't look too hard, really... A woman was having a passionate affair with an inspector from a pest-control company. One afternoon they were carrying on in the bedroom together when her husband arrived home unexpectedly. "Quick," said the woman to her lover, "into the closet!" She bundled him in the closet stark naked. The husband however became suspicious, and after a search of the bedroom discovered the man in the closet. "Who are you?" he asked him. "I'm an inspector from Bugs-B-Gone." "What are you doing in there?" "I'm investigating a complaint about an infestation of moths." "And where are your clothes?" asked the husband. The man looked down at himself and said, "Those little bastards!" ------------------ The RudeDawg Known in these Forgotten Realms as Perin LightEyes and my girlfriends, Pamila and Phil

05-03-2001, 07:02 AM	#2
Drake Baaz Draconian Join Date: March 1, 2001 Location: ? Age: 40 Posts: 729	LOL great LOL ------------------ Drake A.K.A. bocaj

05-03-2001, 11:05 AM	#3
bilqis2 Dungeon Master Join Date: April 8, 2001 Location: Minnesota Northwoods Posts: 65	I work with older people on a daily basis... very healthy & active people all. So I thought this was funny.... don't know if you will tho! Two elderly women were out driving in a large car. They could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along, they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red, but they just went on through. The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself, "I must be losing it. I could have sworn we just went through a red light." After a few more minutes they came to another intersection. The light was red, and again they went right through. This time, the passenger was almost sure that the light had been red, but was also concerned that she might be seeing things. She was getting nervous and decided to pay very close attention. At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was definitely red and they went right through it. She turned to the other woman and said, "Mildred! Did you know we just ran through three red lights in a row? You could have killed us." Mildred turned to her and said, "Oh Shit! Am I driving? ------------------ Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.

05-03-2001, 11:34 AM	#6
slackerboy Gold Dragon Join Date: March 5, 2001 Location: smyrna, tn, usa Age: 46 Posts: 2,506	check this out. it for our aussie friends. http://news.excite.com/news/r/010503...-quarantine-dc ------------------ Lord of the Screen Shot Get My IronWorks Winamp skin

05-03-2001, 12:33 PM	#8
caleb Horus - Egyptian Sky God Join Date: April 10, 2001 Location: Tacoma, WA, U.S.A. Age: 39 Posts: 2,615	Ha I can top that I work in the kitchen of a alzheimers residence and those guys will grab your arm as your walking by and ask you to take them to their room on the second floor........BUT THERES ONLY 1 FLOOR!!! ------------------ Meet my lawyer.

05-03-2001, 12:35 PM	#9
caleb Horus - Egyptian Sky God Join Date: April 10, 2001 Location: Tacoma, WA, U.S.A. Age: 39 Posts: 2,615	Okay today at work one of the alzheimers guys was accusing everyone of stealing his hot dogs!!! LOL!!! ------------------ Meet my lawyer. [This message has been edited by caleb (edited 05-03-2001).]

05-03-2001, 12:41 PM	#10
RudeDawg 20th Level Warrior Join Date: April 9, 2001 Location: Dallas, Tx, USA Age: 55 Posts: 2,830	A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "what is politics?" His dad says, "well son, let me explain it this way: I'm the head of the family, so call me the President. Your mother is the administrator of the money, so we call her the Government. We're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you the People. The nanny, we'll consider her the working class. And your baby brother, we'll call him the Future. Now think about that and see if it makes sense." So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what his father has said. Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him. He finds that the baby has severely soiled his diaper. The little boy goes to his parents' room and finds his mother sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. The next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I think I understand the concept of politics now." The father says, "good son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about." The little boy replies, "The President is screwing the Working Class while the Government is sound asleep. The People are being ignored and the Future is in deep crap." ------------------ The RudeDawg Known in these Forgotten Realms as Perin LightEyes and my girlfriends, Pamila and Phil

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