need MAJOOOOOOOOOOOOR advice

[250]

how do I boost someone's self esteem?

ok, this person, she thinks she is nothing, she thinks she is low because she has something others don't have. (this IS her logic)

she may not realize it but I think she feels hurt when she is cared. She doesn't think she deserves it
she is VERY talented at many things

anyway, she was picked on pretty bad when she was in history class. her classmates talked behind her, lie about her, prank on her

and there are definately more examples like this

my guess is, she believes people love her because of her talents

so my question is:

how do I boost her self esteem?
how do I make her know that people love her for who she is?
how do I show her that her feelings are not truthful?

some words? wisdom? stories? anything! please help!

[Larry_OHF]

This makes me think of a friend of mine.
She is very attractive, and always won beauty pageants.
She had many trophies to prove this, and many talents as well as beauty.
But the other girls of course were mean, and talked bad about her, though she was a very nice, church-going girl.
She did not deserve the taunts she received.
So, her last beauty pageant was for Miss North Carolina...who would eventually go on to try out for the Nation-wide title.
She was told by advisors that they expected her to win.
Yet, she backed out, and gave up pageants all together, just because so many people would use that against her in some way. She never went to the try-outs, and got rid of all her trophies. Nobody cared, and many people were shocked, but in her heart, she felt great! I hope your friend can find the inner strength that she needs to overcome these challenges in her life, and realize that she is in control of who she is, and nobody outside of who she allows can manipulate her future...

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Member of the OHF and Diamond Ranger of the ALSB (secretarial position)
Father of the wicked but cute child known as MaryBeth

Padre de una niña bien traviosa pero guapa
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Aisukuríimu ga tabetái desu.

[This message has been edited by Larry_OHF (edited 09-21-2001).]

[Grand-Ranger]

I had a friend simalir too this.

He felt sorry for his self. His Dad died at a tender age. He wasnt Mr.Popular either.

With a couple of good friends he evenchally just fixed his self.

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So if in the forest look behind you, because that where the ranger is going to be

Grand-Jester of Laghing Hyenas
Messenger of the Emerald Dragon

May a pregnant yak chew on your ear for all eternity.

[This message has been edited by Grand-Ranger (edited 09-21-2001).]

[Ladyzekke]

Well, introduce her to the Ironworks! Where we all like eachother for who we are, not what we look like, nor what talents we may have.

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[250]

Originally posted by ladyzekke: Well, introduce her to the Ironworks! Where we all like eachother for who we are, not what we look like, nor what talents we may have.

Ladiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiziiiiiiiiikkkkkkkkkiiiiii


will you be nice to her then? please?

[250]

Originally posted by Larry_OHF: This makes me think of a friend of mine. She is very attractive, and always won beauty pageants. She had many trophies to prove this, and many talents as well as beauty. But the other girls of course were mean, and talked bad about her, though she was a very nice, church-going girl. She did not deserve the taunts she received. So, her last beauty pageant was for Miss North Carolina...who would eventually go on to try out for the Nation-wide title. She was told by advisors that they expected her to win. Yet, she backed out, and gave up pageants all together, just because so many people would use that against her in some way. She never went to the try-outs, and got rid of all her trophies. Nobody cared, and many people were shocked, but in her heart, she felt great! I hope your friend can find the inner strength that she needs to overcome these challenges in her life, and realize that she is in control of who she is, and nobody outside of who she allows can manipulate her future...

larry, can you be mroe specific? what can I do to give her the strength she needed?

and also, someone else please?

[Ladyzekke]

Originally posted by 250: Ladiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiziiiiiiiiikkkkkkkkkiiiiii will you be nice to her then? please?

Two Fiffee... Of COURSE I will, have no doubt! A friend of yours is a friend of mine!

I'd love to meet her, as we all would!

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[Aelia Jusa]

There really is not much you can do, unfortunately. Inner strength has to come from, well, within. She has to believe that she is worthy of love, and however much you tell her, if she doesn't want to believe it, she won't. Of course, you have to be as supportive and caring as you can, and not be impatient with her, and this may help her realise she is special. Is this the same friend you thought was depressed or bipolar the other day? Maybe she should get some counselling.

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Goddess and Sorceress of the HADB, and her sidekick Pink

[250]

Originally posted by Aelia Jusa: There really is not much you can do, unfortunately. Inner strength has to come from, well, within. She has to believe that she is worthy of love, and however much you tell her, if she doesn't want to believe it, she won't. Of course, you have to be as supportive and caring as you can, and not be impatient with her, and this may help her realise she is special. Is this the same friend you thought was depressed or bipolar the other day? Maybe she should get some counselling.

yeah, she already had so many concellings, thanks
I WILL ALWAYS be supportive

and thanks ladiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiizikkiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

anyone else? anyone had similar experiences? anyone who worked with these kinda people before? anyone helped one?