And for today...(ok it's an oldie)

Arvon · 08-15-2004, 11:24 AM

Rectum Stretcher

While I was flying down the road yesterday (only 10 mph over), I noticed a cop with a radar gun sitting on top of a bridge.

The cop pulled me over, walked up to the car and asked me, "What's the hurry? "

I replied, "I'm late for work."

"Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?"

I responded, "I'm a rectum stretcher."

The cop said "What is a rectum stretcher, and what does a rectum stretcher do?"

I said, "Well, I start with one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then my whole hand, then I work until I can get both hands in there and then I slowly stretch it until it's about 6 foot wide."

The cop asked me, "What the hell do you do with a 6 foot a**h***?"

I simply replied, "You give him a radar gun and park him on top of a bridge..."

The ticket -- $95 dollars.

The look on his face, PRICELESS

[ 08-15-2004, 11:25 AM: Message edited by: Arvon ]

Bahamut · 08-15-2004, 11:35 AM

Oh man that got me with my aching muscles... hahaha!

Attalus · 08-15-2004, 12:12 PM

Pretty funny, Arvon. I've seen it before, but it's been a while, and was good for a smile.

RoSs_bg2_rox · 08-15-2004, 12:14 PM

Im not in a laughing mood today.

[img]tongue.gif[/img]

Neo the Warrior Cat · 08-15-2004, 02:47 PM

[img]graemlins/biglaugh.gif[/img] That is priceless!

btw, How old is this?

Arvon · 08-15-2004, 03:14 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Neo the Warrior Cat:
[img]graemlins/biglaugh.gif[/img] That is priceless!

btw, How old is this?

It's a rehash from a few years ago when that type of joke (photo) was popular.

Xen · 08-15-2004, 03:21 PM

That is hillarious.

Harkoliar · 08-15-2004, 05:37 PM

cute

Hivetyrant · 08-16-2004, 12:38 AM

Hehehehe great one [img]graemlins/thumbsup.gif[/img]

Bungleau · 08-16-2004, 01:43 AM

I heard a similar one, only it was a rabbi talking about what he did with the foreskins left over from circumcisions.... same punch line [img]smile.gif[/img]

08-15-2004, 11:24 AM	#1
Arvon Unicorn Join Date: October 4, 2001 Location: Kingdom of the West,..P.o. Cynagus Posts: 4,212	Rectum Stretcher While I was flying down the road yesterday (only 10 mph over), I noticed a cop with a radar gun sitting on top of a bridge. The cop pulled me over, walked up to the car and asked me, "What's the hurry? " I replied, "I'm late for work." "Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?" I responded, "I'm a rectum stretcher." The cop said "What is a rectum stretcher, and what does a rectum stretcher do?" I said, "Well, I start with one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then my whole hand, then I work until I can get both hands in there and then I slowly stretch it until it's about 6 foot wide." The cop asked me, "What the hell do you do with a 6 foot ah*?" I simply replied, "You give him a radar gun and park him on top of a bridge..." The ticket -- $95 dollars. The look on his face, PRICELESS [ 08-15-2004, 11:25 AM: Message edited by: Arvon ] __________________ 53.7% of all statistics are made up

08-15-2004, 11:35 AM	#2
Bahamut Iron Throne Cult Join Date: March 12, 2001 Location: Manila, Philippines Age: 39 Posts: 4,864	Oh man that got me with my aching muscles... hahaha! __________________ http://makeallthedifference.blogspot.com http://www.bratgirlcentral.com/cgi-b.../ikonboard.cgi

08-15-2004, 12:12 PM	#3
Attalus Symbol of Bane Join Date: November 26, 2001 Location: Texas Age: 75 Posts: 8,167	Pretty funny, Arvon. I've seen it before, but it's been a while, and was good for a smile. __________________ Even Heroes sometimes fail...

08-15-2004, 12:14 PM	#4
RoSs_bg2_rox Zartan Join Date: May 20, 2003 Location: Near Aberdeen, Scotland Age: 34 Posts: 5,225	Im not in a laughing mood today. [img]tongue.gif[/img] __________________ [img]\"http://img.ranchoweb.com/images/ladyzekke/dragonwater2.gif\" alt=\" - \" />

08-15-2004, 02:47 PM	#5
Neo the Warrior Cat Avatar Join Date: July 6, 2004 Location: Wilmington, North Carolina Age: 36 Posts: 528	[img]graemlins/biglaugh.gif[/img] That is priceless! btw, How old is this? __________________ \"I haven\'t the time for this!\"-Irenicus <img border=\"0\" alt=\"[mage1]\" title=\"\" src=\"graemlins/mage1.gif\" />

08-15-2004, 03:21 PM	#7
Xen Symbol of Moradin Join Date: June 5, 2002 Location: Slovenia,Ljubljana Age: 36 Posts: 8,554	That is hillarious.

08-15-2004, 05:37 PM	#8
Harkoliar Jack Burton Join Date: March 21, 2001 Location: Philippines, but now Harbor City Sydney Age: 41 Posts: 5,556	cute __________________ Catch me if you can..

08-16-2004, 12:38 AM	#9
Hivetyrant Jack Burton Join Date: August 24, 2002 Location: Aussie now in the US of A! Age: 37 Posts: 5,403	Hehehehe great one [img]graemlins/thumbsup.gif[/img]

08-16-2004, 01:43 AM	#10
Bungleau 40th Level Warrior Join Date: October 29, 2001 Location: Western Wilds of Michigan Posts: 11,752	I heard a similar one, only it was a rabbi talking about what he did with the foreskins left over from circumcisions.... same punch line [img]smile.gif[/img] __________________ B Save Early, Save Often Save Before, Save After Two-Star General, Spelling Soldiers -+-+-+ Give 'em a hug one more time. It might be the last.

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads
Thread	Thread Starter	Forum	Replies	Last Post
A sick Oldie	Arvon	General Discussion	15	09-25-2005 07:12 PM
An oldie, but a good one.	Dreamer128	General Conversation Archives (11/2000 - 01/2005)	5	08-16-2004 03:29 PM
An oldie... with something new: MM9	Bungleau	Miscellaneous Games (RPG or not)	3	02-07-2004 07:26 AM
Mom (Yes!!! Another Oldie)	Arvon	General Conversation Archives (11/2000 - 01/2005)	8	06-22-2002 12:38 PM
An oldie for you	Arvon	General Conversation Archives (11/2000 - 01/2005)	1	11-01-2001 05:32 PM