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04-03-2002, 12:00 PM
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#1 |
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Unicorn
 Join Date: October 4, 2001
Location: Kingdom of the West,..P.o. Cynagus
Posts: 4,212
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Handy Dictionary to Decipher Personal Ads
WOMEN'S ADS 40-ish: 49 Adventurer: Slept with all your friends Athletic: No breasts Average: looking Has a face like a basset hound Beautiful: Pathological liar Contagious Smile: Does a lot of Ecstasy Educated: Banged her Political Science professor Emotionally Secure: Medicated Feminist: Fat ballbuster Free Spirit: Junkie Friendship first: Trying to live down reputation as a slut Fun: Annoying Gentle: Comatose Good Listener: Borderline Autistic New-Age: All body hair, all the time Old-fashioned: Lights out, missionary position only Open-minded: Desperate Outgoing: Loud and Embarrassing Passionate: Sloppy drunk Poet: Depressive Schizophrenic Professional: Certified Bitch Redhead: Bad dye-job Reubenesque: Grossly Fat Romantic: Looks better by candle light Social: Has been passed around like an hors d'oeuvres tray Voluptuous: Very Fat Weight proportion w/ height: Hugely Fat - as tall as you are wide Wants Soulmate: Stalker Widow: Drove first husband to shoot himself Young at heart: Old bat MEN'S ADS 40-ish: 52 and looking for 25-yr-old Athletic: Watches a lot of NASCAR Average looking: Unusual hair growth on ears, nose, & back Educated: Will patronize you all the time Free Spirit: Banging! your sister Friendship first: As long as friendship involves nookie Fun: Good with a remote and a six pack Good looking: Arrogant Very good looking: Dumb as a board Honest: Pathological Liar Huggable: Overweight, more body hair than a bear Likes to cuddle: Insecure mama's boy Mature: Older than your father Open-minded: Wants to sleep with your roommate but she's not interested Physically fit: Does a lot of 12-ounce curls Poet: Wrote ex-girlfriend's # on a bathroom stall Sensitive: Cries at chick flicks Very sensitive: Gay Spiritual: Got laid in a cemetery once Stable: Arrested for stalking, but not convicted Thoughtful: Says "Excuse me" when he farts
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53.7% of all statistics are made up |
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04-03-2002, 12:20 PM
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#2 |
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Gold Dragon
 Join Date: August 11, 2001
Location: The land of blonde virgins
Age: 42
Posts: 2,563
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LOL
 That's funny Arvon
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Take a look at your Promised Land<br />Your deed is that gun in your hand |
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04-03-2002, 03:24 PM
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#3 |
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Iron Throne Cult
 Join Date: June 3, 2001
Location: There is no IRL, Only AFK.
Age: 35
Posts: 4,896
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LOL!!! Thats Hilarious Arvon... Hehehe
Also True: Very sensitive: Gay
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My pokemon bring all the boys to the yard, and they're like; you wanna trade cards? Damn right, I wanna trade cards, I'll trade this but not my Charizard. |
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04-03-2002, 08:21 PM
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#4 |
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Fzoul Chembryl
 Join Date: March 29, 2001
Location: Montréal, Canada
Age: 49
Posts: 1,763
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LOL, yep, pretty funny. What about:
Looking for a meaningful relationship: ready to marry you tonight, without a pre-nop, and stick it out until she can divorce you for 1/2 your worth [img]smile.gif[/img]
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An idiot will only play Russian roulette with an automatic pistol! Thank God they only do it once! <img border=\"0\" title=\"\" alt=\"[Smile]\" src=\"smile.gif\" /> |
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