A Solution to Terrorism.

John D Harris · 10-08-2001, 08:31 PM

From The Washington Times, written by the editor, Wesley Pruden, Pruden on Politics,” October 2, 2001

A solution to the problem of Islamic Terrorists developed
by the Army: General John “Black Jack” Pershing - USMA class of '86 (that's
1886)

HOW TO STOP ISLAMIC TERRORISTS ... it worked once in our History...

Once in U.S. history an episode of Islamic terrorism was very quickly
stopped. It happened in the Philippines about 1911, when Gen. John J.
Pershing was in command of the garrison. There had been numerous Islamic
terrorist attacks, so “Black Jack” told his boys to catch the perps and
teach them a lesson.

Forced to dig their own graves, the terrorists were all tied to posts,
execution style. The U.S. soldiers then brought in pigs and slaughtered them,
rubbing their bullets in the blood and fat. Thus, the terrorists were the
ones terrorized; they saw that they would be contaminated with hogs' blood.
This would mean that they could not enter Heaven, even if they died as
terrorist martyrs. All but one was shot, their bodies dumped into the
grave, and the hog guts dumped atop the bodies.

The lone survivor was allowed to escape back to the terrorist camp and tell
his brethren what happened to the others. This brought a stop to terrorism in
the Philippines for the next 50 years.

Pointing a gun into the face of Islamic terrorists won't make them flinch.
They welcome the chance to die for Allah. Like Gen. Pershing, we must show
them that they won't get to Muslim heaven (which they believe has an end-less
supply of virgins) but instead will die with the hated pigs of the devil.

A thought... Rather than arm airline pilots, why not put pigs in the cargo
holds of aircraft and prominently post the fact. No, Moslem worth his salt
would want to die in a crash with a pig! The Koran forbids any contact with
the animal on pain of eternal punishment.

(Or try buying a seat for your pet pot-bellied pig the next time you fly.)

Or we could try...

Nothing like American ingenuity.

Hogs Are The Answer

Just a thought.... I was thinking about all this Islamic Jihad
terrorist business.

It seems to me the answer to all our problems is to have the American
farmers produce as many hogs as they possibly can. Millions and millions
of surplus hogs. Every empty plane, train, and ship is called into service
to ship hogs. Boeing starts converting mothballed aircraft into hog
freighters.

Then to answer the call of the radical Islamic factions, we stampede hogs
through their country. Millions of them. Like the herds of bison on the
American plains, these hogs are roaming everywhere. They are eating
everything edible. Fouling everything drinkable. and the beautiful part
of it... they can't eat them, touch them or kill them because hogs are
unholy.

We need to lubricate every American bullet in lard as a lubricant and
anticorrosive and we need to let them know all about it. Let each and every
terrorist know that pork products will enter their body, if killed or
wounded. (They believe they cannot go to heaven if any pork enters their
bodies). Let's take the martyrdom card out of their deck. Let's see how
ambitious their zealots are knowing their bodies and souls are nothing
but rotting corpses being eaten by hogs when they die. No more of this
going to heaven for a cause. We stimulate our economy with pork bellies and
eliminate the Holy War in the process. Its now just a dirty blood and guts
war.
We'll see how happy they are then.

------------------

Crustiest of the OLD COOTS
Airline ticket to Afghanistan $800
High powered rifle with scope $1000
Hotel room with roof access $100
A clean Head shot on that sack of Horse Manure Usuma Bin Laden PRICELESS!

SSJ4Sephiroth · 10-08-2001, 08:36 PM

HA! looks like the people from Arkansas were on to something all along! hmm, perhaps we could go on the march with a cart full of hogs in tow... a food supply AND an efficient weapon against the Islamic terrorists!

------------------
It's simple. Once the Planet is hurt, it gathers Spirit Energy to heal the injury. The amount of energy gathered depends on the size of the injury...What would happen if there was an injury that threatened the very life of the Planet? Think how much energy would be gathered! Ha, ha, ha. And at the center of that injury, wil be me. All that boundless energy will be mine. By merging with the energy of the Planet, I will be come a new life form, a new existence. Melding with the Planet, I will cease to exist as I am now. Only to be reborn as a 'God' to rule over every living soul.

What are you saying? Are you trying to tell me you have feelings now? Ha, ha, ha... Stop acting as if you're sad. And there's no need to act as if you're angry either. Because, Cloud, you are... a puppet.

Super Sephiroth, slayer of the Uber Fluffy, and battle co-ordionator and defender of the HADB clan.
Follower of the mighty Fallen Paladin himself.
Diplomacy is all and well, but HADB is better!
Head of the IronWorks Intelligence Division
Official Soup Server and bumper of Cloudy's Cafe
Possessor of the Aerie Diamond Head from the ALSB.
Page in the Court of Lady Lioness

Stalking the woodlands,
the Lioness in my sight,
warm feelings doth come,
into my lonely heart

250 · 10-08-2001, 08:50 PM

hahahahaa!!

this might work!

Liliara · 10-08-2001, 11:24 PM

Hmmm... maybe we should send this suggestion to our congressmen! LOL I LOVE IT!!!!

(by the way, I'm serious!)

------------------

Captain of Bouncers, Boogre Bar

LH Member

And you never did think that it ever would happen again, in America did you? And you never did think that we'd ever get together again, but we damn sure fooled ya. We're walkin' real proud and we're talkin' real loud again, in America. And you never did think that it ever would happen again.... (Charlie Daniels)

John D Harris · 10-08-2001, 11:28 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Liliara:
Hmmm... maybe we should send this suggestion to our congressmen! LOL I LOVE IT!!!!

(by the way, I'm serious!)

Miss Liliara Ma'am, a woman after my own heart.

------------------
Crustiest of the OLD COOTS
Airline ticket to Afghanistan $800
High powered rifle with scope $1000
Hotel room with roof access $100
A clean Head shot on that sack of Horse Manure Usuma Bin Laden PRICELESS!

Lifetime · 10-09-2001, 01:43 AM

Wonderful! Only then, the Muslim world will REALLY begin to see this as an attack against Islam.

------------------
No-Name Face

Diogenes Of Pumpkintown · 10-09-2001, 01:50 AM

An unfortunate example, John D.

Those "terrorists" were Phillipinos rebelling against unjust and brutal American rule of their country. It is nothing at all to brag about, rather a shameful episode in American history.

Liliara · 10-09-2001, 01:51 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by John D Harris:

Quote:

Originally posted by Liliara:
Hmmm... maybe we should send this suggestion to our congressmen! LOL I LOVE IT!!!!

(by the way, I'm serious!)

Miss Liliara Ma'am, a woman after my own heart.

::Curtsies low with a smile:: The pleasure is all mine sir.

Lifetime, come on, it would be a quick end to what will probably turn out to be a long war! Besides, most Muslims are smarter than that! Those that are not being fed propaganda by the Taliban and bin Laden, know where we stand. They look down upon terrorism as much as any other SANE individual!

When you are talking about people who look forward to committing suicide, sometimes your options are limited!

------------------

Captain of Bouncers, Boogre Bar

LH Member

And you never did think that it ever would happen again, in America did you? And you never did think that we'd ever get together again, but we damn sure fooled ya. We're walkin' real proud and we're talkin' real loud again, in America. And you never did think that it ever would happen again.... (Charlie Daniels)

Donut · 10-09-2001, 04:31 AM

An interesting theory John D. But how would you handle the billions of Muslims queueing to get on airliners?

------------------

Save Chip - Don't let Sarah win!
Official Titterer of the Laughing Hyenas
Don't mention the score - I mentioned it once but I think I got away with it!

Bruce The Aussie · 10-09-2001, 04:48 AM

so you suggest the govournment stasrts a religeos war? hhhm might work apart from the fact you'd condem millions of islams to beleve there damned.

would probably work though

------------------

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10-08-2001, 08:31 PM	#1
John D Harris Ninja Storm Shadow Join Date: March 27, 2001 Location: Northport,Alabama, USA Age: 62 Posts: 3,577	From The Washington Times, written by the editor, Wesley Pruden, Pruden on Politics,” October 2, 2001 A solution to the problem of Islamic Terrorists developed by the Army: General John “Black Jack” Pershing - USMA class of '86 (that's 1886) HOW TO STOP ISLAMIC TERRORISTS ... it worked once in our History... Once in U.S. history an episode of Islamic terrorism was very quickly stopped. It happened in the Philippines about 1911, when Gen. John J. Pershing was in command of the garrison. There had been numerous Islamic terrorist attacks, so “Black Jack” told his boys to catch the perps and teach them a lesson. Forced to dig their own graves, the terrorists were all tied to posts, execution style. The U.S. soldiers then brought in pigs and slaughtered them, rubbing their bullets in the blood and fat. Thus, the terrorists were the ones terrorized; they saw that they would be contaminated with hogs' blood. This would mean that they could not enter Heaven, even if they died as terrorist martyrs. All but one was shot, their bodies dumped into the grave, and the hog guts dumped atop the bodies. The lone survivor was allowed to escape back to the terrorist camp and tell his brethren what happened to the others. This brought a stop to terrorism in the Philippines for the next 50 years. Pointing a gun into the face of Islamic terrorists won't make them flinch. They welcome the chance to die for Allah. Like Gen. Pershing, we must show them that they won't get to Muslim heaven (which they believe has an end-less supply of virgins) but instead will die with the hated pigs of the devil. A thought... Rather than arm airline pilots, why not put pigs in the cargo holds of aircraft and prominently post the fact. No, Moslem worth his salt would want to die in a crash with a pig! The Koran forbids any contact with the animal on pain of eternal punishment. (Or try buying a seat for your pet pot-bellied pig the next time you fly.) Or we could try... Nothing like American ingenuity. Hogs Are The Answer Just a thought.... I was thinking about all this Islamic Jihad terrorist business. It seems to me the answer to all our problems is to have the American farmers produce as many hogs as they possibly can. Millions and millions of surplus hogs. Every empty plane, train, and ship is called into service to ship hogs. Boeing starts converting mothballed aircraft into hog freighters. Then to answer the call of the radical Islamic factions, we stampede hogs through their country. Millions of them. Like the herds of bison on the American plains, these hogs are roaming everywhere. They are eating everything edible. Fouling everything drinkable. and the beautiful part of it... they can't eat them, touch them or kill them because hogs are unholy. We need to lubricate every American bullet in lard as a lubricant and anticorrosive and we need to let them know all about it. Let each and every terrorist know that pork products will enter their body, if killed or wounded. (They believe they cannot go to heaven if any pork enters their bodies). Let's take the martyrdom card out of their deck. Let's see how ambitious their zealots are knowing their bodies and souls are nothing but rotting corpses being eaten by hogs when they die. No more of this going to heaven for a cause. We stimulate our economy with pork bellies and eliminate the Holy War in the process. Its now just a dirty blood and guts war. We'll see how happy they are then. ------------------ Crustiest of the OLD COOTS Airline ticket to Afghanistan $800 High powered rifle with scope $1000 Hotel room with roof access $100 A clean Head shot on that sack of Horse Manure Usuma Bin Laden PRICELESS!

10-08-2001, 08:36 PM	#2
SSJ4Sephiroth Beholder Join Date: May 4, 2001 Location: The Outside Looking In Age: 37 Posts: 4,361	HA! looks like the people from Arkansas were on to something all along! hmm, perhaps we could go on the march with a cart full of hogs in tow... a food supply AND an efficient weapon against the Islamic terrorists! ------------------ It's simple. Once the Planet is hurt, it gathers Spirit Energy to heal the injury. The amount of energy gathered depends on the size of the injury...What would happen if there was an injury that threatened the very life of the Planet? Think how much energy would be gathered! Ha, ha, ha. And at the center of that injury, wil be me. All that boundless energy will be mine. By merging with the energy of the Planet, I will be come a new life form, a new existence. Melding with the Planet, I will cease to exist as I am now. Only to be reborn as a 'God' to rule over every living soul. What are you saying? Are you trying to tell me you have feelings now? Ha, ha, ha... Stop acting as if you're sad. And there's no need to act as if you're angry either. Because, Cloud, you are... a puppet. Super Sephiroth, slayer of the Uber Fluffy, and battle co-ordionator and defender of the HADB clan. Follower of the mighty Fallen Paladin himself. Diplomacy is all and well, but HADB is better! Head of the IronWorks Intelligence Division Official Soup Server and bumper of Cloudy's Cafe Possessor of the Aerie Diamond Head from the ALSB. Page in the Court of Lady Lioness Stalking the woodlands, the Lioness in my sight, warm feelings doth come, into my lonely heart

10-08-2001, 08:50 PM	#3
250 Horus - Egyptian Sky God Join Date: March 4, 2001 Location: either CA or MO Age: 42 Posts: 2,674	hahahahaa!! this might work!

10-08-2001, 11:24 PM	#4
Liliara Red Wizard of Thay Join Date: August 17, 2001 Location: Florida Posts: 874	Hmmm... maybe we should send this suggestion to our congressmen! LOL I LOVE IT!!!! (by the way, I'm serious!) ------------------ Captain of Bouncers, Boogre Bar LH Member And you never did think that it ever would happen again, in America did you? And you never did think that we'd ever get together again, but we damn sure fooled ya. We're walkin' real proud and we're talkin' real loud again, in America. And you never did think that it ever would happen again.... (Charlie Daniels)

10-09-2001, 01:43 AM	#6
Lifetime Red Dragon Join Date: March 3, 2001 Location: Scotch College, Melbourne Posts: 1,503	Wonderful! Only then, the Muslim world will REALLY begin to see this as an attack against Islam. ------------------ No-Name Face

10-09-2001, 01:50 AM	#7
Diogenes Of Pumpkintown Banned User Join Date: August 9, 2001 Location: ... Posts: 694	An unfortunate example, John D. Those "terrorists" were Phillipinos rebelling against unjust and brutal American rule of their country. It is nothing at all to brag about, rather a shameful episode in American history.

10-09-2001, 04:31 AM	#9
Donut Jack Burton Join Date: March 1, 2001 Location: Airstrip One Age: 40 Posts: 5,571	An interesting theory John D. But how would you handle the billions of Muslims queueing to get on airliners? ------------------ Save Chip - Don't let Sarah win! Official Titterer of the Laughing Hyenas Don't mention the score - I mentioned it once but I think I got away with it!

10-09-2001, 04:48 AM	#10
Bruce The Aussie Fzoul Chembryl Join Date: March 2, 2001 Location: Chaotica (london,england) Age: 37 Posts: 1,798	so you suggest the govournment stasrts a religeos war? hhhm might work apart from the fact you'd condem millions of islams to beleve there damned. would probably work though ------------------

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