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Old 10-20-2004, 08:54 PM   #1
Stormymystic
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My grandmothers biopsy came back and it is cancer, she has more test to be run in the morning, but as old as she is I am not looking for it to be good news, but how do I explain it to my kids that she is probably not going to live much longer and that we can no longer see her? I do not want to come right out and say she died, with them not really knowing what death is, but yet they need to know why we can not go there when she does pass away, I want them to be ready for it, this is pretty much the hardest thing I have had to face so far
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Old 10-20-2004, 09:00 PM   #2
Dron_Cah
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That's horrible, Stormy! Hmm, if it was me, though, I wouldnt tell the kids, until all hope is lost. And that's not usually till the whole ordeal is over. Anyways, if you believe in God, I would just suggest telling your kids that their Great-Grandmother has gone to live with God, now, and you can't visit till much later. I hope everything turns out well, and you dont have to worry about it, Stormy! [img]smile.gif[/img]
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Old 10-20-2004, 09:05 PM   #3
armageddon272
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i really wouldn't be asking such a serious question in a games forum. but, if you want my advice its this, first go check with child psychology books, then try what my parents did to me (though i dont know if its the beast idea or not), tell them nothing and let them inquire about it. when they are old enough and logical enough to make a close guess, youll know they are mature enough to know what happenned. they may have a grudge against you for not telling them, but it will help them mature.
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Old 10-20-2004, 09:24 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally posted by armageddon272:
i really wouldn't be asking such a serious question in a games forum. but, if you want my advice its this, first go check with child psychology books, then try what my parents did to me (though i dont know if its the beast idea or not), tell them nothing and let them inquire about it. when they are old enough and logical enough to make a close guess, youll know they are mature enough to know what happenned. they may have a grudge against you for not telling them, but it will help them mature.
okay, first off,. this is not only a game forum, look up it says general conversation

and, now my answer would be, explain it to them in a babyish way, like...hmm she's gonna be sleeping...or somthing of that sort, and...i'll tell more thru msn XD,
but i mean, they will learn it one time or another, i'd say explain it to them, but in a simple way, that's what i'd do anyways , well good luck with this ^_^
 
Old 10-20-2004, 09:29 PM   #5
Dirty Meg
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The death of a family member will be difficult to deal with whatever you do. Be honest. It will be easier for them to deal with it if they know what's actually happened.
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Old 10-20-2004, 11:14 PM   #6
Bungleau
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There's no easy way to address it. I believe in the honesty policy -- explain to them that everyone is on earth for a while, some longer than others. And your grandmother has been on the earth for a long time, and one day, she will die and her spirit won't be here any more. Her body will be left behind, but she won't be in it any more.

I also believe that kids should be exposed to the funeral as well. They may need and want a chance to say goodbye as well, when that time comes. Fortunately, funerals today aren't what I remember growing up. I remember being at the funeral home for three full days, not the two or three bouts of two hour visitations.

Plus, with the current approach of putting up posters with pictures of the deceased, it actually makes it a good way to say goodbye, especially at a young age.

But that's my opinion... and I haven't had to test it out in a while. Hmmm... I think that when my grandmother passed, my daughter (three at the time) may have come to one visitation.

Talk over with your husband and decide what makes the most sense for both of you. You're the ones who have to make and live with the decision.

Good luck on it.
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Old 10-20-2004, 11:25 PM   #7
Stormymystic
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thanks guys, I am not sure what is the best approach, I do remember how bad I felt that my parents did not let my go to my grandmothers funeral on my dads side, but I was a little older than my kids are :/
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Old 10-21-2004, 07:52 AM   #8
Nightwing
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There are a variety of childrens stories that deal with death. Reading one to them could get the conversation started in the right direction. I would sugest that you be clear with yourself on how you feel about death because the kids will come out of this with your example in thier hearts. Be honest though, kids are very smart and can deal with almost anything if presented in a loving way.
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Old 10-21-2004, 11:47 PM   #9
Harkoliar
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Old 10-22-2004, 01:36 AM   #10
shadowhound
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Quote:
Originally posted by Nightwing:
There are a variety of childrens stories that deal with death. Reading one to them could get the conversation started in the right direction.
I have to agree, thats what my parents did with me when my granfather passed away when I was young. I think it helped.
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