A Little something for everyone

John D Harris · 07-03-2001, 07:37 PM

1. Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
2. A day without sunshine is like...night.
3. On the other hand...you have different fingers.
4. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
6. Remember, half the people you know are below
average.
7. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
8. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
9. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into
jet engines.
10. The early bird may get the worm, but the second
mouse gets the cheese.
11. I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
12. I intend to live forever - so far so good.
13. Borrow money from a pessimist - they don't expect
it back.
14. Quantum mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of.
15. Support bacteria - they're the only culture some
people have.
16. When everything's coming your way, you're in the
wrong lane and going the wrong way.
17. Experience is something you don't get until just
after you need it.
18. For every action there is an equal and opposite
criticism.
19. Never do card tricks for the group you play poker
with.
20. No one is listening until you make a mistake.
21. You never really learn to swear until you learn to
drive.
22. Two wrongs are only the beginning.
23. The problem with the gene pool is that there is no
lifeguard.
24. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad
memory.
25. Change is inevitable...except from vending
machines.
26. Get a new car for your spouse - it'll be a great
trade!
27. Always try to be modest and be proud of it!
28. How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my
hand...
29. Love may be blind but marriage is a real
eye-opener.
30. If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving
isn't for you.

------------------

"the memories of a man in his old age,
are deeds of a man in his prime"

Fljotsdale · 07-03-2001, 08:15 PM

I haven't heard ANY of those before! Love 'em!

------------------

sylent · 07-03-2001, 08:54 PM

I like 25.!!!
Really funny stuff

------------------

"Watch your back"

Ladyzekke · 07-03-2001, 08:59 PM

LOL Mr. Harris! Thanks for the laugh this evening!

Each one is funny as shite! (still laughing)...

Wulfere · 07-03-2001, 09:30 PM

FOCALHAO!!

LOL...

Those are great. Thanks for the new water cooler fodder.
Just where did you find those?

------------------

The line between good and evil is a razor sharp thing. Be careful of misteps,
as you may find yourself spitted upon your own blade.

John D Harris · 07-03-2001, 09:41 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Wulfere:
FOCALHAO!!

LOL... Those are great. Thanks for the new water cooler fodder.
Just where did you find those?

My dad and his old fighter pilot buddies e-mail all kinds of stuff like that.
I'm not sure where they get it from, maybe oxygen deprivation

------------------

"the memories of a man in his old age,
are deeds of a man in his prime"

sylent · 07-03-2001, 09:45 PM

Bit of a mistake there on my part, I actually meant that I liked number 24. which is: "A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad
memory.", just in case you didn't want to scroll up to find it.

that ozygen deprivation must be hardcore stuff.

------------------

"Watch your back"

07-03-2001, 10:25 PM

Lsfmicsi... This thread cracked me up! You know now that you moved soulth the heat is on. You will miss the northern skys .. And cool winter nights with the snow so clean and crisp.
Biteing on your toes and fingers
Touching your lips
Wearing your heat flow down to minumium
Ears ready to snap
Extremidies holding for warm..Fire.
White fluffy Christmas seasons
Ice skateing on frozen lakes...
You will be back..

------------------

Conan

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07-03-2001, 07:37 PM	#1
John D Harris Ninja Storm Shadow Join Date: March 27, 2001 Location: Northport,Alabama, USA Age: 62 Posts: 3,577	1. Save the whales. Collect the whole set. 2. A day without sunshine is like...night. 3. On the other hand...you have different fingers. 4. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name. 6. Remember, half the people you know are below average. 7. He who laughs last thinks slowest. 8. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm. 9. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines. 10. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. 11. I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol. 12. I intend to live forever - so far so good. 13. Borrow money from a pessimist - they don't expect it back. 14. Quantum mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of. 15. Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have. 16. When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane and going the wrong way. 17. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it. 18. For every action there is an equal and opposite criticism. 19. Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with. 20. No one is listening until you make a mistake. 21. You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive. 22. Two wrongs are only the beginning. 23. The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard. 24. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. 25. Change is inevitable...except from vending machines. 26. Get a new car for your spouse - it'll be a great trade! 27. Always try to be modest and be proud of it! 28. How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my hand... 29. Love may be blind but marriage is a real eye-opener. 30. If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving isn't for you. ------------------ "the memories of a man in his old age, are deeds of a man in his prime"

07-03-2001, 08:15 PM	#2
Fljotsdale Thoth - Egyptian God of Wisdom Join Date: March 12, 2001 Location: Birmingham, West Mid\'s, England Age: 87 Posts: 2,859	I haven't heard ANY of those before! Love 'em! ------------------

07-03-2001, 08:54 PM	#3
sylent Emerald Dragon Join Date: January 8, 2001 Location: Melbourne, Australia Age: 40 Posts: 948	I like 25.!!! Really funny stuff ------------------ "Watch your back"

07-03-2001, 08:59 PM	#4
Ladyzekke Ironworks Atomic Moderator Join Date: January 7, 2001 Location: Virginia, U.S.A. Age: 57 Posts: 9,005	LOL Mr. Harris! Thanks for the laugh this evening! Each one is funny as shite! (still laughing)...

07-03-2001, 09:30 PM	#5
Wulfere Red Wizard of Thay Join Date: March 20, 2001 Location: Lincoln, Nebraska USA Age: 63 Posts: 893	FOCALHAO!! LOL... Those are great. Thanks for the new water cooler fodder. Just where did you find those? ------------------ The line between good and evil is a razor sharp thing. Be careful of misteps, as you may find yourself spitted upon your own blade.

07-03-2001, 09:45 PM	#7
sylent Emerald Dragon Join Date: January 8, 2001 Location: Melbourne, Australia Age: 40 Posts: 948	Bit of a mistake there on my part, I actually meant that I liked number 24. which is: "A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.", just in case you didn't want to scroll up to find it. that ozygen deprivation must be hardcore stuff. ------------------ "Watch your back"

07-03-2001, 10:25 PM	#8
Conan Guest Posts: n/a	Lsfmicsi... This thread cracked me up! You know now that you moved soulth the heat is on. You will miss the northern skys .. And cool winter nights with the snow so clean and crisp. Biteing on your toes and fingers Touching your lips Wearing your heat flow down to minumium Ears ready to snap Extremidies holding for warm..Fire. White fluffy Christmas seasons Ice skateing on frozen lakes... You will be back.. ------------------ Conan

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