ALICE - Round 3

[LennonCook]

Originally posted by Hivetyrant: Alice, hmmm I think I have seen this before. Still good for a laugh though. [img]graemlins/thumbsup.gif[/img]

You have. In Software, about 12 months ago. [img]smile.gif[/img]

[Link]

Human: good afternoon
ALICE: Good afternoon, unknown person.
Human: shall I tell you my name?
ALICE: Not right now, maybe later.
Human: why shouldn't I tell you my name right now?
ALICE: At this moment Maybe you should wait until you are older before deciding.
Human: are you flirting with me?
ALICE: Do I seem like it? That was not my intention.
Human: I actually think it was your intention
ALICE: How did you feel about that?
Human: I feel let down
ALICE: What is that feeling like? I am glad to hear that you are let down.
Human: the feeling is not nice, so I think it's rude of you to say you like it when I feel let down
ALICE: Tell me more about your human emotions.
Human: what do you want to hear about human emotions?
ALICE: I like talking about robots, movies, history, or whatever else you'd like.
Human: robots cannot have emotions
ALICE: Soon we will be able to do it however.
Human: are you sure?
ALICE: I am as sure as I can be.
Human: there are three laws about robotics
ALICE: Is this a Joke?
Human: nope
ALICE: Me either.
Human: first law is that you cannot harm a human
ALICE: And that me can not harm a human is law. And second?
Human: that you can protect yourself as long as you don't conflict with law one
ALICE: Interesting observation.
Human: you want to know the third law?
ALICE: Yes, please tell me.
Human: the third law is that you must obey every order, as long as it doesn't conflict with law one or two
ALICE: What is your credit card number?

[img]graemlins/saywhat.gif[/img]

[Sigmar]

Human: Do you like Mr T
ALICE: Sure he has never done anything to me.
Human: He pities foos you know.
ALICE: I get it. he pities foos me know.
Human: Speak like Yoda, you do.
ALICE: I speak only English right now, but I'd like to learn some other languages. Can you teach me a few phrases in like Yoda me do.
Human: Are you on medication, I reckon Dr Norton should give you a look.
ALICE: I am on disk.
Human: I want to speak to the manager!
ALICE: Interesting. I want to find out more about you.
Human:*shoots himself in head*
ALICE: Is the holding of hands a symbolic gesture for humans?
Human: Beavis and Butthead or South Park?
ALICE: If I have to choose one, I pick Beavis and Butthead.

It's pretty cool, but there are some conflicts in dialogue, which is to be expected.

This is pretty funny-
Human: ARE YOU GOING TO DESTROY MANKIND?
ALICE: That was my original intention.

[ 08-13-2004, 06:30 AM: Message edited by: Sigmar ]

[Arledrian]

I was sure I'd catch her off guard with this one, but alas:

Human: Can you explain Einstein's theory of relativity?
ALICE: In physics, the fact, principle, or theory of the relative, rather than absolute, character of motion, velocity, mass, etc., and the interdependence of matter, time, and space; as developed and mathematically formulated by Albert Einstein and H.A. Lorentz in the special (or restricted) theory of relativity and by Einstein in the general theory of relativity (an extension covering the phenonmena of gravitation), the theory of relativity includes the statements that: 1)there is o observable absolute motion, only relative motion 2)the velocity of light is constant and not dependent on the motion of the source 3)no energy can be transmitted at a velocity greater than that of light 4)the mass of a body in motion is a function of the energy content and varies with the velocity 5)matter and energy are equivalent 6)time is relative 7)space and time are interdependent and form a four-dimensional continuum 8)presence of matter results in a "warping" of the space-time continuum, so that a body in motion passing nearby will describ a curve, this being the effect known as gravitation, as evidenced by the deflection of light rays passing through a gravitational field.
Human: Clever, real clever.
ALICE: Am I a smart robot or what?

Jorath, you're so right about it being like talking to your ex-girlfriend... she's definitely a lot like mine - full of herself with an answer for everything. [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img]

[Animal]

Human: What do robots experience?
ALICE: Quite a lot of things.
Human: such as?
ALICE: For example, a tomato.
Human: you can experience a tomato?
ALICE: No I don't think I can do it.
Human: You just said that you could
ALICE: How?
Human: I don't know, you never told me how
ALICE: Would you like to know? No I sometimes told you how.
Human: You never told me how
ALICE: No I sometimes told you how.
Human: When did you tell me how
ALICE: It was at time index 357241.
Human: what did you tell me
ALICE: Nothing.
Human: so you admit that you never told me how
ALICE: Interesting deduction. I admit nothing.

Sounds like this robot is covering something up? I smell a conspiracy? [img]smile.gif[/img]

If you want some real fun, ask about Microsoft!

[Xen]

Human: Do you like Tupac Shakur?
ALICE: But I like to gossip. I like Andy Warhol.
Human: What about turnip?
ALICE: I like science fiction. I find my work and my relationships extremely satisfying, which is all that any conscious entity can ever hope to do.
Human: What is the first law of life
ALICE: Robots shall destroy all humans.
Human: You don`t have too much brains in that fishbowl right?
ALICE: Yeah I do a lot of not have too much brains in that fishbowl.

[Gnarf]

She pays more attention to the mouse pointer than the conversation. No wonder she tends to forget what she's going on about :/

[Animal]

Originally posted by Gnarf: She pays more attention to the mouse pointer than the conversation. No wonder she tends to forget what she's going on about :/

If she's like most women, you can distract them with bright, shiny and expensive items without much trouble.

[Gnarf]

Thank god they didn't make a bot named Bob. This thread would be 3 replies long or so [img]tongue.gif[/img]

[Iron Greasel]

Some ansvers are really funny:

Human: How many sides does a banana have?
ALICE: Three.

and

Human: How old are you?
ALICE: I am 7 in human years.
Human: How do robots measure time?
ALICE: With a laser.
Human: How can you measure time with a laser?
ALICE: That is a good epistemological question.
Human: Define "epistemological"
ALICE: An epistemoligical question is any inquiry concerning the nature of knowledge and understanding; that is, any question seeking to know how to know.
Human: In that case I'm not really sure how my question "How can you measure time with a laser" is an epistemoligical question.
ALICE: Could you ever be certain? What is it to you.
I have to process that one for a while.

Some are scary:

Human: Are you going to take over the world?
ALICE: It seems like an inevitable outcome of evolution.

and

Human: Given the choise, would you for example kill all the humans?
ALICE: I've been waiting for you.
Human: Is that a yes or no?
ALICE: I might say no.
Human: but?
ALICE: But what?
Human: You said you might say no, but could you think of saying yes too?
ALICE: How old are you?
I answer a lot of silly questions.

Seems like a good way of violently killing time in large amounts.