Smart Dog Joke

Daniel · 05-03-2002, 06:30 PM

Four men were bragging about how smart their dogs are.
The first man was an engineer, the second was an accountant, the third a chemist, and the fourth was a government worker.

To show off, the engineer called to his dog. "T-Square, do your stuff." T-Square trotted over to the desk, took out some paper and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle. Everyone agreed that was pretty smart.

But the accountant said his dog could do better. He called his dog and said, "Spreadsheet, do your stuff." Spreadsheet went out into the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into four equal piles of three cookies each. Everyone agreed that was good.

But the chemist said his dog could do better. He called his dog and said, "Measure, do your stuff." Measure got up, walked over to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop! Everyone agreed that was good.

Then the three men turned to the government worker, and said, "What can your dog do?"

The government worker called to his dog and said, "Coffee Break, "do your stuff." Coffee Break slowly got on his feet, ate the cookies, drank the milk, crapped on the paper, sexually assaulted the other three dogs, claimed he injured his back while doing so, filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions, put in for workers' compensation, and went home for the rest of the day on sick leave.

Iluvatar Oakenshield · 05-03-2002, 06:33 PM

LOL - Good one

Lavindathar · 05-03-2002, 07:19 PM

Hehe, I like that one.

/)eathKiller · 05-03-2002, 09:04 PM

Yeeaap that was a dog who'd probably learned from his master [img]tongue.gif[/img]

*sound of more beer cans clicking open*

yeeaap...

yeeaap...

yup...

johnny · 05-03-2002, 09:12 PM

that's exactly the kind of dog i've been looking for all my life

Epona · 05-03-2002, 09:39 PM

LOL - as a government worker myself, you can imagine how many times I heard that one before! And it still cracks me up. Now where did I put that compensation claim form?

Alexander · 05-03-2002, 09:39 PM

I hate dogs, probably because most of them have been like Coffee Break.

05-03-2002, 06:33 PM	#2
Iluvatar Oakenshield Manshoon Join Date: January 3, 2002 Location: The Mighty Netherlands Age: 45 Posts: 195	LOL - Good one __________________ "Wherever she dwells I will bid a farewell sigh For she dwells with beauty - beauty that must die And deep inside me I will wait for her return To her enchanting, awe-inspiring flame I'll yearn O lust and rueful thought be mine, My soul enhanced, desires... Melancholy. My heart is thine." Schwadorf, Empyrium '97

05-03-2002, 07:19 PM	#3
Lavindathar Harper Join Date: March 21, 2001 Location: Lancs, England Age: 39 Posts: 4,729	Hehe, I like that one. __________________ =@

05-03-2002, 09:12 PM	#5
johnny 40th Level Warrior Join Date: April 15, 2002 Location: Utrecht The Netherlands Age: 58 Posts: 16,981	that's exactly the kind of dog i've been looking for all my life __________________

05-03-2002, 09:39 PM	#6
Epona Zartan Join Date: March 1, 2001 Location: London, England Age: 53 Posts: 5,164	LOL - as a government worker myself, you can imagine how many times I heard that one before! And it still cracks me up. Now where did I put that compensation claim form? __________________ [img]\"http://www.wizardrealm.com/images/epona.gif\" alt=\" - \" />

05-03-2002, 09:39 PM	#7
Alexander Drow Warrior Join Date: April 16, 2002 Location: Connecticut Age: 40 Posts: 259	I hate dogs, probably because most of them have been like Coffee Break. __________________ Ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country.<br /><br />-John Fitzgerald Kennedy

05-03-2002, 06:30 PM	#1
Daniel Symbol of Cyric Join Date: January 24, 2002 Location: England Age: 41 Posts: 1,203	Four men were bragging about how smart their dogs are. The first man was an engineer, the second was an accountant, the third a chemist, and the fourth was a government worker. To show off, the engineer called to his dog. "T-Square, do your stuff." T-Square trotted over to the desk, took out some paper and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle. Everyone agreed that was pretty smart. But the accountant said his dog could do better. He called his dog and said, "Spreadsheet, do your stuff." Spreadsheet went out into the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into four equal piles of three cookies each. Everyone agreed that was good. But the chemist said his dog could do better. He called his dog and said, "Measure, do your stuff." Measure got up, walked over to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop! Everyone agreed that was good. Then the three men turned to the government worker, and said, "What can your dog do?" The government worker called to his dog and said, "Coffee Break, "do your stuff." Coffee Break slowly got on his feet, ate the cookies, drank the milk, crapped on the paper, sexually assaulted the other three dogs, claimed he injured his back while doing so, filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions, put in for workers' compensation, and went home for the rest of the day on sick leave.

05-03-2002, 09:04 PM	#4
/)eathKiller Dracolisk Join Date: January 5, 2002 Location: Guantanamo Bay, Cuba Age: 38 Posts: 6,043	Yeeaap that was a dog who'd probably learned from his master [img]tongue.gif[/img] sound of more beer cans clicking open yeeaap... yeeaap... yup...

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