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Old 05-06-2001, 01:45 PM   #11
Cloudbringer
Ironworks Moderator
 

Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Upstate NY USA
Posts: 19,737
Quote:
Originally posted by The Pope:
You sicko, you!

Actually, you don't need any hands at all. Just rip that thing off.
Same effect, and you save time.

Ack! Romance Police! Arrest this perpetrator of Anti-Romance at once!

TEEHEE

SultryCloud

------------------
Raindancer of the Laughing Hyenas Clan
Storm-Queen
StormCloud of the Black Knight
Heart Mind Soul Forever
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Old 05-06-2001, 01:46 PM   #12
John D Harris
Ninja Storm Shadow
 

Join Date: March 27, 2001
Location: Northport,Alabama, USA
Age: 62
Posts: 3,577

1. The difference between love and lust. Done

2. How to change a tire, a diaper, and a woman's mind. Yes, Yes, good luck

3. When to hold on and when to let go.Done

4. Your capacity for intimacy and alcohol.Done

5. Basic carpentry, plumbing and automotive repair.Done

6. Advanced foreplay. Needs constant practice

7. At least one woman other than their mother whose love for them is
substantial and enduring.Done (see wife)

8. Trouble when he sees it.Done

9. True love when he feels it.Done

10. A load of bull when he hears it.Done (anything that sounds too good to be true IS)

11. The symptoms of PMS and how to deal with them.Done (Run like your feet are on fire and your butts catch'n)

12. His strengths and weaknesses.Done

13. How to fast-talk and slow-dance.Done

14. The art of seduction.Done

15. That his wife (lover, girlfriend) is not his mother.Done ( you betchum red rider)

16. A woman's erogenous zones.Done

17. How to negotiate the inevitable compromises of a romantic relationship
in ways that keep both sides as happy as possible.Done

18. What he wants out of life and how to go after it.Doing

19. Which medical tests he needs and when to get them.Tests we don't need no stinking tests

20. How to make money, dinner, conversation and love.Done,does grill cheese count?,Done,Done (needs constant pratice)

21. His own needs and another person's ability to fulfill them.Done

22. How to start a fire-in the hearth and the heart.Done

23. A realistic plan to secure his retirement.Playing the lottery is not realistic? Mummm go to Plan "B"

24. An idealistic plan to secure his grandchildren's future.Done

25. How to unhook a bra with one hand-in the dark.Look No Hands

26. Where to get breakfast/gas/a prescription filled at 2 am.Done

27. How to give a toast and take a compliment.Done

28. How to be gracious in victory and defeat.Done

29. When to talk and when to listen.What did you say?

30. At least one true friend who will be there whenever he calls.Done

31. The fundamental workings of the female psyche.I have a wife and 2 daughters Its impossible I tell you

32. The Ten Commandments.Done

33. The importance of trying to follow them.Doing

34. His way around a kitchen.I guess "Honey where's the plates" doesn't count?

35. The futility of unrequited love.Done

36. The ecstasy of unconditional love.Doing

37. How to open a bottle of champagne.Yeh, see if you can hit something with right?

38. How to negotiate.Done

39. How to close a deal.Done

40. The magic of a woman.Done (see: wife, "Ohh wee baby baby" love of life)


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[This message has been edited by John D Harris (edited 05-06-2001).]
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Old 05-06-2001, 02:03 PM   #13
Cloudbringer
Ironworks Moderator
 

Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Upstate NY USA
Posts: 19,737
Quote:
Originally posted by RudeDawg:
I would NEVER run from the CloudyFlirt!
LOL... Not diving for an exit...well, now that's reassuring!

And uh, did your find that nick someplace else? LOL...it HAS been used...heehee
But we don't want to get me in trouble, steaming up and off-topicing threads and all.

Now how the heck did you manage to get your incredibly sweet and winsome self single again? Not that any lady here is complaining, mind you! S'ok, we'll take gooood care of you here.. teehee! And we'll try to get you to stop dancing with yourself once in a while!


Mouse! Single rodents are quite teachable ...HAHAHAHA.. Now that you have the windshield out of your car...why not take the top off an we can go for a spin? LOL..instant convertible...teehee

CloudSiren


------------------
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Storm-Queen
StormCloud of the Black Knight
Heart Mind Soul Forever
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Old 05-06-2001, 02:09 PM   #14
RudeDawg
20th Level Warrior
 

Join Date: April 9, 2001
Location: Dallas, Tx, USA
Age: 54
Posts: 2,830
Quote:
Originally posted by Cloudbringer:
Now how the heck did you manage to get your incredibly sweet and winsome self single again? Not that any lady here is complaining, mind you! S'ok, we'll take gooood care of you here.. teehee! And we'll try to get you to stop dancing with yourself once in a while!

CloudSiren
Old story. Just me being me. she found someone else, more to her liking. And, I don't change myself for anyone.

Love me, hate me, but you will not ignore me, or forget me. I am the RudeDawg, the rudest one of all... LOL
no, no. Seriously, she just didn't want to wait for me, and chose to go her way. No biggie. :shrug:

"Dancing with myself! O-O-OhOh!"


------------------

The RudeDawg
Known in these Forgotten Realms as Perin LightEyes
and my girlfriends, Pamila and Phil
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Old 05-06-2001, 02:29 PM   #15
Cloudbringer
Ironworks Moderator
 

Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Upstate NY USA
Posts: 19,737
Quote:
Originally posted by RudeDawg:
Old story. Just me being me. she found someone else, more to her liking. And, I don't change myself for anyone.

Love me, hate me, but you will not ignore me, or forget me. I am the RudeDawg, the rudest one of all... LOL
no, no. Seriously, she just didn't want to wait for me, and chose to go her way. No biggie. :shrug:

"Dancing with myself! O-O-OhOh!"


Oh baby, oh baby! LOL... I know EXACTLY what you mean! Hahahah... Did I mention, SINGLE and FABULOUS FORTY? LOL... and high % of the reason? CB is too 'intelligent' (and has ooh..gasp..opinions!) for most gentlemen of her acquaintance and she finally got sick of playing 'dumb' to make other folk happy! LOL... Be yourself, only good way to be!

Hey, we like you the way you are... er so far.. you aren't going to start talking to yourself again, are you?

HAPPYTOBEMECloud




------------------
Raindancer of the Laughing Hyenas Clan
Storm-Queen
StormCloud of the Black Knight
Heart Mind Soul Forever
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Old 05-06-2001, 02:34 PM   #16
RudeDawg
20th Level Warrior
 

Join Date: April 9, 2001
Location: Dallas, Tx, USA
Age: 54
Posts: 2,830
Talking to yourself isn't a bad thing. It's when you argue, and LOSE to your self that you're in trouble .

wait for it...


wait for it....


boom!

------------------

The RudeDawg
Known in these Forgotten Realms as Perin LightEyes
and my girlfriends, Pamila and Phil


[This message has been edited by RudeDawg (edited 05-06-2001).]
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Old 05-06-2001, 02:36 PM   #17
Mouse
Ironworks Moderator
 

Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Scotland
Posts: 2,788
I am inspired - time to go to the pub and exchange pleasantries with nubile young wenches. I will report back later on any new tricks I can learn
------------------
Regards



Mouse

[This message has been edited by Mouse (edited 05-06-2001).]

[This message has been edited by Mouse (edited 05-06-2001).]
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Old 05-06-2001, 02:39 PM   #18
Reeka
Ma'at - Goddess of Truth & Justice
 

Join Date: March 2, 2001
Location: Birmingham, Alabama, USA
Age: 70
Posts: 3,255
The female equivalent:

1. The difference between love and lust./The difference between a man loving you and lusting after you.

2. How to change a diaper, a tire, a woman's mind./ How to get a man to do all these things and think it is his idea.

3. When to hold on and when to let go./Same.

4. Your capacity for intimacy and alcohol./Your husband's, boyfriend, etc., capacity for intimacy and alcohol

5. Basic carpentry, plumbing and auto repair./ How to use a telephone.

6. Advanced foreplay./How to teach advanced foreplay and make him think that he thought it up.

7. At least one woman other than their mother whose love for them is substantial and enduring./At least one man other than their father whose love for them is substantial and enduing.

8. Trouble when he sees it./Men that are trouble when she sees them.

9. True love when he feels it./Same

10. A load of bull when he hears it./A man feeding her a line when she hears it.

11.The symptoms of PMS and how to deal with them./The realization that men will attribute any bad mood you are in to PMS.

12.His strengths and weaknesses. / His strengths and weaknesses.

13.How to fast-talk and slow dance./ How to recognize fast-talking. How to slow-dance.

14. The art of seduction./The art of seduction.

15.That is wife, lover, girlfriend is not your mother./ That you are his wife, lover, or girlfrriend but not his mother.

16. A woman's erogenous zones. / Men are just one big erogenous zone.

17.How to negotiate the inevitable compromises of a romantic relationship in ways that keep both sides as happy as possible./ How to let a man think that he is in charge.

18.What he wants out of life and how to get it/Same

19.Which medical tests he needs and when to get them/Same

20.How to make money, dinner, and love./Same

21.His own needs and another person's ability to fulfill them/Same

22.How to start a fire in the hearth and the heart/Same

23.A realistic plan to secure his retirement/Same

24. An idealistic plan to secure his grandchildren's future./Same

25.How to unlook a bra with one-hand in the dark./How to pretend that you don't know that he's unlooking your bra with one-hand in the dark.

26.Where is get breakfast/gas/a prescription filled at 2:00 a.m./Same

27. How to give a toast and take a compliment/Same

28.How to be gracious in victory and defeat/Same

29.When to talk and when to listen/Same

30.At least one true friend who will be there whenever he calls/Same

31.The fundamental workings of the female psyche./The fact that you will never understand the fundamental workings of the male psyche.

32.The Ten Commandments/Same

33. The importance of trying to follow them/Same

34.His way around the kitchen/How to find a man who knows his way around the kitchen

35.The futility of unrequited love/Same

36. The ecstasy of unconditional love/Same

37.How to open a bottle of champagne/How to let a man open a bottle of champagne and not say anything even if he screws up.

38.How to negotiate./Same

39.How to close a deal/Same

40. The magic of a woman./Men are never going to think like you do.





------------------
Reeka--The Hand of Death O_H_F
GMDLM

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Old 05-06-2001, 02:43 PM   #19
RudeDawg
20th Level Warrior
 

Join Date: April 9, 2001
Location: Dallas, Tx, USA
Age: 54
Posts: 2,830
Quote:
Originally posted by Reeka:
The female equivalent:

31.The fundamental workings of the female psyche./The fact that you will never understand the fundamental workings of the male psyche.


O Man , that's simple.

1. we crave food.
2. we crave sex.
3. we crave toys / entertainmant.

mix and match the above, and we're happy !!!

The ChauvanistDawg

------------------

The RudeDawg
Known in these Forgotten Realms as Perin LightEyes
and my girlfriends, Pamila and Phil


[This message has been edited by RudeDawg (edited 05-06-2001).]
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Old 05-06-2001, 03:06 PM   #20
Cloudbringer
Ironworks Moderator
 

Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Upstate NY USA
Posts: 19,737
Quote:
Originally posted by RudeDawg:
Talking to yourself isn't a bad thing. It's when you argue, and LOSE to your self that you're in trouble .

wait for it...


wait for it....


boom!

Teehee... actually dearest RudeDawg, I frequently talk to myself! And I do answer...sometimes... hahahaha! So go for it.

Hey, we could get together and have a four way conversation, hmmm?


CloudSparkler

------------------
Raindancer of the Laughing Hyenas Clan
Storm-Queen
StormCloud of the Black Knight
Heart Mind Soul Forever
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