Great Gaming Moments

[Morgeruat]

these are some quotes from a Werewolf the Apocalypse Forum I've visited before, about great moments, if you have funny stories from any game system please post them, I know this type of thread has been done before, and it was alot of fun for everyone to read.

in the last game I ran,
the Get Ahroun {editors note}(get of Fenris are and extremely warlike tribe of werewolves, and Ahroun are the "fighters" in their society) got this notion in his head that the Corax {wereraven}
NPC was a steed to be ridden into battle. Just about any
time the Corax was there as they were preparing for
battle, "Ivan, go into Crinos{1/2man 1/2 animal form}!" Ivan, the Corax, would
reply with various things breaking down to "not on your
life!"

Storyteller: "I'm introducing a few rule-changes for the
sake of realism"

Player: "Realism can suck the five forms of my d***.{in werewolf most werecreatures have 5 shapes, human, 1/2man, animal, an "in between shape of man and 1/2, and wolf and 1/2man, essentially a dire wolf approx 5' at the shoulder"

DM- "You walk into the Ancient One's tomb, the stench of
death surrounding you. You see him, chained, immobilized..."

Me- "I rip off the top of his head and eat his brains."

DM- "WHAT?!?! You can't do that!!!!!"

Me- "Can he get out of the chains?"

DM- "No."

Me- "Can he move at all?"

DM- "No."

Me- "Can he even wake up?"

DM- "No."

Me- "So, there's nothing to protect his fragile, lifeless
form."

DM- "No, but..."

Me- "I rip off the top of his head and eat his brains."

DM- "WHY?!?!?!?!"

Me- "Because this story both blows and sucks at the same
time. And whilst that may be quite an achievement, it's not
a reason to keep going. All in favour?"

Other Players- "Aye!"

Me- "All opposed?"

DM- "You guys suck!"

Me- "We're vampires ****head, we're supposed to suck.
What's your excuse?"

Player 1: "I want to track the bear" (Thinking it was a
Gurahl{werebears})

*rolls dice - botches*{critical failure}

Evil GM: "You're running along, tracking the scent, nose to
the ground, and as you turn the corner - pre-occupied with
your catching your prey, you stick your snout in a fresh
pile of Poo"

P1: "What!! I'd have smelled that!"

GM: "Obviously not, you just botched"

P1: "Screw you, I'm going back to the Caern{spiritually potent lair}"

*Goes *directly to Caern* (Note: he was asked if he wanted to do any thing else first)

P2 and NPC Elders: "What's that on you're face, Owen?"

P1: "What?"

P3 (Ragabash): "I watched 'im, it's bear s**t he ran into
chasing the Gurahl"

GM: "Now would you like another chance to wash your face?"

Me (before game): I've had a crappy day, and am in a bad
mood. As you see here I have taken the time to print up a
bunch of sheets.

Hunter Player: I attack the Werewolf.{hunters are humans with the ability to see the supernatural for what they are, and some think they're bigger and badder than they really are}
Me: Is you're charecter Dumb, or does he have a death wish?

Me (as the Were after gutting the upety Hunter): Well that
was fun, who's next?

Alright just to set the scene, My Kitsune{werefox} had just been
captured by a bunch of welsh Fianna {werewolvers from the british Isles}. Not wanting to tell
them he's a Fera{shapechanger} he keeps his mouth firmly shut. Having
been beaten and tied to a stake the Inquisition reaches it
conclusion.

Philidox {judges of werewolf society} Fianna : If you don't respond to my next question I will kill you.
Me (Finally breaking my silence): Alright so do I have your
word of honour that if I should give you a reason why I’m
here you will not kill me?
PF(By now *very* frustrated):Yes my word of honour is yours.
Me: So if I am to talk you will hear what I have to say and
not allow me to die because of it.
PF(Practically screaming): Yes, but if you are an agent of
the wyrm{evil} I will suffer you not to live.
Me: Agreed
PF: So why are you here!?!
Me(in a welsh accent): I'm here to start a Brothel, I’ll
call it "The Farm".

At this point the Fianna's Pack-mates have to pin him to
the floor to stop him from frenzying when confronted with
my obvious lie and threats of disembowelment I responded.

"I never said I had to give you *My* reason for being here."

Luckily I was bailed out by a First Team{minions of the Wyrm} strike on the Caern (well Lucky for me anyway) and I think my characters never going to Wales again.

The human who is holding you from falling over the edge of
the building is loosing her grip.

I shift to crinos so I have the strength to pull myself up.

.....errrr.....are you sure.

Yeah course I am. Roll for it already!!!

No need. Not only can't she hold an 900lb werewolf she
also goes into delirium{freaks out} and drops your sorry ass anyway.

.....do I get a soak bonus if I flap?{in werewolf you roll dice to "soak" damage, ie absorb it through use of your supernatural hardiness, very usefull as everyone has only 7 hp's, or the equivalent}

Upon being confronted by the pack for mumbling about our
pack Lupus {werewolf born as a wolf, our Get Ahroun defended himself by saying:

"What I think out loud is none of your business!!"

Get of Fenris Ragabash {[/i]trickster[/i]}: "You {edit}Moron. I can't believe you like that German s***."
Glass Walker{city based werewolves} Ragabash: "Don't diss the 'Stein, dude."
Get: "I'm not dissing *them*, I'm dissing *you* for your completely retarded taste in music."
Fianna Ahroun: "You know, if you would just ONCE put some Enya on..."
Get and GW together: "Shut up, Pete."

My group discusses the various merits of Rammstein.

Isn't it inconvenient? The whole . . not being alive
thing?" says my Glasswalker Theurge{werewolf seer's and visionaries} to a Vampire.

"That like . . rocks my world. I need to go and like . .
adjust." says the same Theurge the first time he finds out
that he;s working with a couple of Vampires and a Mage.

One that stuck in my last group.

I was playing a type A Silver Fang{leaders of the werewolves, nobility} frat boy with responsibility issues, who's whole deal was reveling in
his werewolf nature, while shrugging off the all to duty (or making a game of it) as long as he could.

Nearing the end of explaining his plan to get into a pharmacedical company that was beleived to also house a pack of BSDs...{Black Spiral Dancers, werewolves that have been corrupted by evil} "So (x and y packmates) will guard the sewers in case the other BSDs try and use their back exit. Unleashing the crazy ones (two BSDS known to be inside were drugged to perpetual frenzy; neither friend nor foe was safe) should be a sufficient pain in the ass
for their security. The only potential snag could be if the cops show up on our way out. If then..."

He hadn't thought about this part. He pauses, then shrugs
casually.

"F*** it. They're cops. We're werewolves."

[ 02-25-2003, 11:22 AM: Message edited by: Morgeruat ]

[arion windrider]

pretty funny stories i like the last line [img]smile.gif[/img]

[SomeGuy]

Here is a story from me and my friends playing D&D. I was the DM.I copied this from my uncles story with a few add ins when we played.We were'nt playing it properly so I just estimated how much damage they took etc etc. This is pretty long though...

Me(DM): Okay you are walking along through the forest. Okay tell me what way you guys arem postioned.
Joseph (half elven Bard): I am on the far left right there. *points to dot on map*
Bryce (Human Fighter): I am in the middle.
Tylor (elven Cleric): I am on the right side I guess.
Me: Tylor you are hit by an arrow in the arm and take 2 damage.That leaves you with 10.
Tylor: WHAT!? From where?
Me: As you look to see where the arrow came from you notice a brownish grayish kobold running off with a bow and arrow.
Bryce:What is a kobold?
Me: It is a little dog rat like humanoid thing that attack mosty in numbers and communicate through yips and the such.
Bryce:Oh.
Me: Well anyway what do you do?
Joseph: We follow it!
Me: We? You mean you right? You don't control the entire party.
Tylor and Bryce: We follow it.
Me: Okay you follow it through the bushes and come into a clearing. In the middle is a stump that is slightly uprooted.
Joseph: I go and examine it.
Me: You see that small dog like tracks follow it.
Joseph: Are they kobold tracks?
Me:You tell me.
Joseph: Can I go under the stump?
Me: Yes.
Joseph: I crawl under the stump.
Tylor: Me too
Bryce: I go too
Me: Okay you go under and a dark tunnel only tall and wide enough for you to crawl into.You three are on your hands and knees in this order:Joseph,Tylor,Bryce.What do you do?
Joseph: I crawl further down the tunnel.
Me: You crawl down the tunnel-wait are you guys following him?
Bryce/Tylor: Yes
Me: Okay as you go down the tunnel an overpowering stench surcums you. Your grow dazed.
Jo:I keep going on
Me: Your knee lands right in kobold crap.
Tylor Bryce: HAHAHAHA!!!
Me: And the stench is so disgusting Tylor pukes on Joseph boots and Bryce pukes on Tylor's boots.
Bryce: HAHAHA!
Joseph:Ew.Man why is all this bad and nasty things happening to me?
Tylor: I got hit with and arrow dude!
Me: Do you keep going?
All: Yes
Me: Okay you come into a larger tunnel that you can stand up in. This area leads into to smaller tunnels on the left and right. What do you? By the way it is pitch black except for a little light coming form the tunnel to the right.
Tylor: I use my infravision that you told me elves had.
Me: You see nothing but the heat of the light from the right tunnel.
Bryce: What is infravision anyway?
Me: Able to see heat and ccld in darkness
Bryce: Ooooh.
Me: You also see little red eyes coming from the left tunnel.
Tylor(giggling): I shout: I LIKE BIG BUTTS!
Me: More eyes
Tylor: I was kidding
Me: So
Tylor: But I was only joking!
Me: More eyes can be seen
Tylor: HEY!
Me: All of a sudden you all feel pain. Joseph in your head. Tylor in your butt. And Bryce in you crotch. You are all unconscience.
ALL: WHAT?!!
Me: You awake in a cage. Light surrounds you and kobolds walk around outside you. A rather huge Kobold sits on a thrown. What do you do?
Joseph:....
Bryce: Hit Joseph.
Joseph: Hey!
Me: You take no damage. Your equipment is gone and you are clothed only by your tunics.Suddenly you hear crys of battle. Gnomes come rushing in attacking Kobolds. As you watch the battle and bearded gnome comes up and speaks to you in several languages until the gnome speaks common.
ME(Gnome female): "What are you doing here? Get out!"
Joseph: We are stuck here!
Me(gnome): The gnome brings up it's mighty hammer and smacks off the lock.
Bryce: We're free!!
Me: Kobolds stab you.Your almost dead.I was fed up with them at this point because they were'nt listening. I did'nt include this.
Joseph: I stay in the back until the battles over.
Tylor: I stay with Joseph.
Bryce: HEY! I get back there with them.
Me: Soon the sounds of battle die down and cease.
Joseph: I walk out and see what has happened.
Me: Over there and over there and over there and over there (while pointing to map) are dead Kobolds.Right here(Pointing to far corner of map) is a lake.
Joseph: I go jump in. (Believe it or not my cousing did the exact same thing)
Me: You start to feel a burning sensation. Your tunic burns. You eyebrow disolve along with all yout hair. Your skin start to peel. You ahve just jumped into an acid lake.
Joseph: I get out! I GET OUT!.
Me: Once you climb out you have no clothes or hair.

At this point we are all laughing. I will end it here since it is getting a bit long.

[RevRuby]

well umm...our first gaming session doing the whole werewolf thingy with nathan as dm. we were going through this wyrm tainted farm house and in the basement they had a lab. the lab contained some big glass tubes (almost ceiling to floor) filled with green liquid and anamals. in two were creatures in silver suits. trying to decide how to get them out i chose to see if the green liquid was dangerous, i pulled off my sock and dropped it in. it grew teeth and satrted swimming around. anyway that made our glasswalker who was a sniper decide that shooting it in order to break it open was a bad idea. i replied with "what don't you want a werehouse?"

if you don;t get it say werehouse out loud.