Woman Drivers

Lifetime · 01-16-2002, 04:03 AM

I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver cut right in front of a pickup truck, causing him to have to drive onto the shoulder. This evidently pissed the driver off enough that he hung his head out his window and flipped the woman off. "Man, that guy is stupid," I thought to myself. I ALWAYS smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner whenever a female does anything to me in traffic, and here's why:

I drive 38 miles each way every day to work - that's 76 miles. Of these, 16 miles each way is bumper-to-bumper. Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8-lane highway, so if you just look at the 7 lanes I am not in, that means I pass something like a new car every 40 feet per lane. That's 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles. That works out to be 982 cars every mile, or 31,424 cars. Even though the rest of the 34 miles is not bumper to bumper. I figure I pass at least another 4000 cars. That brings the number to something like 36,000 cars I pass every day. Statistically half of these are driven by females, that's 18,000. In any given group of females 1 in 28 are having the worst day of their period. That's 642. According to Cosmopolitan, 70% describe their love life as dissatisfying or unrewarding, that's 449. According to the National Institutes of Health, 22% of all females have seriously considered suicide or homicide, that's 98. And 34% describe men as their biggest problem, that's 33. According to the National Rifle Association 5% of all females carry weapons and this number is increasing. That means that EVERY SINGLE DAY, I drive past at least one female that has a lousy love life, thinks men are her biggest problem, has seriously considered suicide or homicide, is having the worst day of her period, and is armed.

No matter what she does in traffic, I wouldn't DREAM of flipping her off.

Barry the Sprout · 01-16-2002, 06:59 AM

I am sure some people have an issue with your post, but frankly I thought it was just too bloody funny!

250 · 01-16-2002, 07:05 AM

I feel sorry for those women though. It doesnt have to be this way

EDIT: good post, by the way

[ 01-16-2002: Message edited by: 250 ]

Downunda · 01-16-2002, 07:12 AM

Soooooooo glad I live in NZ

Garnet FalconDance · 01-16-2002, 10:22 AM

Lifetime,

Leave it to you to quantify such a thing! [img]smile.gif[/img]

Excellant post, tho. Sad in a way, but emminently uplifting (that you at least *think* before doing--now if all the women would also think .........)

Lifetime · 01-16-2002, 10:55 AM

quote:
Originally posted by Garnet FalconDance:
Lifetime,

Leave it to you to quantify such a thing! [img]smile.gif[/img]

Excellant post, tho. Sad in a way, but emminently uplifting (that you at least *think* before doing--now if all the women would also think .........)

Haha thanks but I wished I deserved that [img]smile.gif[/img] I copied it off an email I got

Dreamer128 · 01-16-2002, 11:52 AM

What really anoys me is Seniors in traffic. People shoudnt be allowed to drive a car after they turn 70. Take my grandfather, his licence wont run out for 5 years, yet he is a danger on the road. What if he gets someone killed? Those folks always seem to drive way to slow on the highways, and way to hard in town. Very dangerous.

[ 01-16-2002: Message edited by: Dreamer128 ]

01-16-2002, 11:56 AM

I would've worked out the stats myself but my calculator blew up [img]tongue.gif[/img]

Dreamer128 · 01-16-2002, 11:57 AM

[img]graemlins/1partyguy.gif[/img] Yeah! [img]graemlins/3party.gif[/img] I'm now a white dragon! [img]graemlins/cake.gif[/img] 1800 posts, its hard to believe! [img]graemlins/balloons.gif[/img]
[img]graemlins/thewave.gif[/img]

[ 01-16-2002: Message edited by: Dreamer128 ]

01-16-2002, 04:03 AM	#1
Lifetime Red Dragon Join Date: March 3, 2001 Location: Scotch College, Melbourne Posts: 1,503	I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver cut right in front of a pickup truck, causing him to have to drive onto the shoulder. This evidently pissed the driver off enough that he hung his head out his window and flipped the woman off. "Man, that guy is stupid," I thought to myself. I ALWAYS smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner whenever a female does anything to me in traffic, and here's why: I drive 38 miles each way every day to work - that's 76 miles. Of these, 16 miles each way is bumper-to-bumper. Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8-lane highway, so if you just look at the 7 lanes I am not in, that means I pass something like a new car every 40 feet per lane. That's 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles. That works out to be 982 cars every mile, or 31,424 cars. Even though the rest of the 34 miles is not bumper to bumper. I figure I pass at least another 4000 cars. That brings the number to something like 36,000 cars I pass every day. Statistically half of these are driven by females, that's 18,000. In any given group of females 1 in 28 are having the worst day of their period. That's 642. According to Cosmopolitan, 70% describe their love life as dissatisfying or unrewarding, that's 449. According to the National Institutes of Health, 22% of all females have seriously considered suicide or homicide, that's 98. And 34% describe men as their biggest problem, that's 33. According to the National Rifle Association 5% of all females carry weapons and this number is increasing. That means that EVERY SINGLE DAY, I drive past at least one female that has a lousy love life, thinks men are her biggest problem, has seriously considered suicide or homicide, is having the worst day of her period, and is armed. No matter what she does in traffic, I wouldn't DREAM of flipping her off. __________________ \'Cause its always raining in my head. Forget all the things I should have said..

01-16-2002, 07:12 AM	#4
Downunda Set - Egyptian God of Chaos Join Date: January 7, 2002 Location: Christchurch, New Zealand Age: 45 Posts: 2,975	Soooooooo glad I live in NZ __________________ \"Doing stuff is overrated, like Hitler, he did lots of stuff, but doesn\'t everybody wish he\'d just stayed at home and smoked pot?!?\"

01-16-2002, 10:22 AM	#5
Garnet FalconDance Mephistopheles Join Date: August 30, 2001 Location: deep within the sylvan splendor.... Age: 60 Posts: 1,443	Lifetime, Leave it to you to quantify such a thing! [img]smile.gif[/img] Excellant post, tho. Sad in a way, but emminently uplifting (that you at least think before doing--now if all the women would also think .........) __________________ "Nature tells every secret once." Ralph Waldo Emerson

01-16-2002, 10:55 AM	#6
Lifetime Red Dragon Join Date: March 3, 2001 Location: Scotch College, Melbourne Posts: 1,503	quote: Originally posted by Garnet FalconDance: Lifetime, Leave it to you to quantify such a thing! [img]smile.gif[/img] Excellant post, tho. Sad in a way, but emminently uplifting (that you at least think before doing--now if all the women would also think .........) Haha thanks but I wished I deserved that [img]smile.gif[/img] I copied it off an email I got __________________ \'Cause its always raining in my head. Forget all the things I should have said..

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01-16-2002, 06:59 AM	#2
Barry the Sprout White Dragon Join Date: October 19, 2001 Location: York, UK. Age: 41 Posts: 1,815	I am sure some people have an issue with your post, but frankly I thought it was just too bloody funny!

01-16-2002, 07:05 AM	#3
250 Horus - Egyptian Sky God Join Date: March 4, 2001 Location: either CA or MO Age: 42 Posts: 2,674	I feel sorry for those women though. It doesnt have to be this way EDIT: good post, by the way [ 01-16-2002: Message edited by: 250 ]

01-16-2002, 11:52 AM	#7
Dreamer128 Dracolisk Join Date: March 21, 2001 Location: Europe Age: 39 Posts: 6,136	What really anoys me is Seniors in traffic. People shoudnt be allowed to drive a car after they turn 70. Take my grandfather, his licence wont run out for 5 years, yet he is a danger on the road. What if he gets someone killed? Those folks always seem to drive way to slow on the highways, and way to hard in town. Very dangerous. [ 01-16-2002: Message edited by: Dreamer128 ]

01-16-2002, 11:56 AM	#8
Sorcerer Alex Guest Posts: n/a	I would've worked out the stats myself but my calculator blew up [img]tongue.gif[/img]

01-16-2002, 11:57 AM	#9
Dreamer128 Dracolisk Join Date: March 21, 2001 Location: Europe Age: 39 Posts: 6,136	[img]graemlins/1partyguy.gif[/img] Yeah! [img]graemlins/3party.gif[/img] I'm now a white dragon! [img]graemlins/cake.gif[/img] 1800 posts, its hard to believe! [img]graemlins/balloons.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/thewave.gif[/img] [ 01-16-2002: Message edited by: Dreamer128 ]

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