Anathema to Politics and Serious thought- Cloudys Corner

[Cloudbringer]

Gabriel...FUNNY!!! hehehe

Cloudy

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Storm-Queen
Purple Rose of the Black Knight

cloudsylph, check yer mail

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When given a choice, take both.

[Donut]

It's often said that if you drop a piece of toast it always lands butter side down on the floor.

If you drop a cat it always lands on it's feet.

What happens if you strap a piece of toast, butter side up onto the back of a cat and drop them from a height?

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The Truth is in the Profile

[Gabriel]

You'll go to jail.

[This message has been edited by Gabriel (edited 03-11-2001).]

[Black Knight]

Why is Abbreviated such a long word?

When you send Styrofoam somewhere, what do you package it in?

I could go on . . .

BK

[Donut]

Why is dyslexic so hard to spell?

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The Truth is in the Profile

[Moiraine]

LOL Donut ! Funny as always.

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[Charlie]

How does the bloke who drives a snow plough get to work in the morning?
Why is abbreviated such a long word?
Why do kamikaze pilots wear crash helmets?
Why is there only one monopolies comission?

I could go on..........and on............and on

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One love, peace.

[Charlie]

Just nicked this off of my brothers website. Posted by his mate Coda regarding strange labelling etc.

On a blanket from Taiwan -
NOT TO BE USED AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO.

On a helmet mounted mirror used by US cyclists -
REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY
BEHIND YOU.

On a Taiwanese shampoo -
USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE.

On the bottle-top of a (UK) flavoured milk drink -
AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT.

On a New Zealand insect spray -
THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS.

In a US guide to setting up a new computer -
TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES
TO WARM UP TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING.
(Sensible, but the instruction was INSIDE
the box.)

On a Japanese product used to relieve painful haemorrhoids -
LIE DOWN ON BED AND INSERT POSCOOL SLOWLY UP TO THE
PROJECTED PORTION LIKE A SWORD-GUARD INTO ANAL
DUCT. WHILE INSERTING POSCOOL FOR APPROXIMATELY 5
MINUTES, KEEP QUIET.

In some countries, on the bottom of Coke bottles -
OPEN OTHER END.

On a packet of Sunmaid raisins -
WHY NOT TRY TOSSING OVER YOUR FAVOURITE
BREAKFAST CEREAL?

On a Sears hairdryer -
DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING.

On a bag of Fritos -
YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY.
DETAILS INSIDE.
(The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap -
DIRECTIONS - USE LIKE REGULAR SOAP.
(And that would be how?)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box) -
DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN.
(Too late! You lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -
PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On a Korean kitchen knife -
WARNING: KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN.
(Dammit! Who are they to tell me what to do with my kids?)

On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights -
FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY.
(As opposed to use in outer space?)

On a Japanese food processor -
NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts -
WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS.
(Really? And that's bad why?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts
INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS.
(I'm glad they cleared that up.)

On a Swedish chainsaw -
DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR
GENITALS.
(What kind of consumer phone-call led to this warning?)

On a child's superman costume -
WEARING OF THIS GARMENT DOES NOT ENABLE YOU TO
FLY.
(That's right, destroy a universal childhood fantasy!)

On some frozen dinners:
SERVING SUGGESTION: DEFROST.

On a hotel provided shower cap in a box:
FITS ONE HEAD.

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY.

On Boot's "Children's" cough medicine:
DO NOT DRIVE CAR OR OPERATE MACHINERY.

On Nytol sleep aid:
WARNING: MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS.

Cracked me right up


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One love, peace.

[Moiraine]

LOL Charlie !
Are these really true ?

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