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Old 09-16-2001, 11:56 PM   #1
250
Horus - Egyptian Sky God
 

Join Date: March 4, 2001
Location: either CA or MO
Age: 42
Posts: 2,674
how can I help a EXTREMELY sensitive and insecure person?
no, not moni, I am talking about someone else here. though I am concerned about my friend Moni's wellbeing.

but in this case, I am talking about someone else

she rejects the positive things people say to her, and she rejects to believe her depression has nothing to do with genetic. she feels extremely insecure, and she is very moody. and she rejects indications that people want her to be happy and care about her

gosh, what the hell is wrong!!!?
sometimes I am SOOOOO goddamn confused, what should I do? I mean, she had a rough life, more than you can imagine, but how can I help her??? I just don't see a way to get to her if she is like that!!

**feeling really hurt**
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Old 09-16-2001, 11:59 PM   #2
adam warlock
Ma'at - Goddess of Truth & Justice
 

Join Date: January 7, 2001
Location: I live inside of my mind.....
Age: 53
Posts: 3,234
that's not a good sign.... how long she's been like this?

right now, the first thing comes to mind is professional help when friends and family is not enough...

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Old 09-17-2001, 12:00 AM   #3
Sazerac
Ironworks Moderator
 

Join Date: January 7, 2001
Location: Monroe, LA
Age: 60
Posts: 7,387
250, it sounds as if your friend may be suffering from clinical depression. By it's very nature (because of it's ability to bring out denial tendencies in people) it can be one of the hardest disorders to treat.

It may not be that, of course, but it does sound like it. All you can do is to be there for her, be her friend, and suggest that she may wish to talk to someone about her problems. If someone else has had experience working with someone suffering from depression, maybe they would have some more insights as to what to do.

Good luck! I wish you the best.



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Old 09-17-2001, 12:02 AM   #4
Lifetime
Red Dragon
 

Join Date: March 3, 2001
Location: Scotch College, Melbourne
Posts: 1,503
On a lighter note, it might just be PMS

Girls are girls..
dont care too much, or they'll think you're a possessive obsessive controlling dominating stalker
Trust me, I Know

------------------
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Old 09-17-2001, 12:02 AM   #5
Grand-Ranger
Galvatron
 

Join Date: March 29, 2001
Location: Everywhere I wanna go its already where I am,cause I am already there
Posts: 2,130
Talk to her,250.

Explain what she is doing to her. Its hard, I know. But that seems to be the only option here. Spend alot of time with her, try to make her feel beter.

Thats my advice.

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Messenger of the Emerald Dragon

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Old 09-17-2001, 12:04 AM   #6
adam warlock
Ma'at - Goddess of Truth & Justice
 

Join Date: January 7, 2001
Location: I live inside of my mind.....
Age: 53
Posts: 3,234
Quote:
Originally posted by Lifetime:
On a lighter note, it might just be PMS

Girls are girls..
dont care too much, or they'll think you're a possessive obsessive controlling dominating stalker
Trust me, I Know
now most men can't ALWAYS use that excuse ...not anymore...

I say severe form of depression.... hopefully it does not involve the next stage....




[This message has been edited by adam warlock (edited 09-17-2001).]
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Old 09-17-2001, 12:04 AM   #7
250
Horus - Egyptian Sky God
 

Join Date: March 4, 2001
Location: either CA or MO
Age: 42
Posts: 2,674
Quote:
Originally posted by adam warlock:
that's not a good sign.... how long she's been like this?

right now, the first thing comes to mind is professional help when friends and family is not enough...




OK, that is ENOUGH!!!

**got to be strong for her**

professional help?
she said she has Bipolar Depression, or had. neither way, the doctor said the cause is "she never expressed her feelings"

I've always been there for her, or tried. I did everything I could to make her happy, but it just seems like a cycle here!

whenever she is happy, laughing... then the next day, BOOOM! drop back to depression, and most of all, she REFUSE to talk about her life... **so frustraited**

do you think maybe I need some more patience here? do you think I should not press the issue too much?
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Old 09-17-2001, 12:06 AM   #8
Fljotsdale
Thoth - Egyptian God of Wisdom
 

Join Date: March 12, 2001
Location: Birmingham, West Mid\'s, England
Age: 87
Posts: 2,859
250, she doesn't love herself. You have to find out why, if you can. She will neve be happy if she doesn't think she is a worthwhile person, and if she doesn't love herself.
It is no good you TELLING her she is loveable and worthwhile. She has to discover WHY she feels bad about herself, THEN she, with help, can start to see that whoever MADE her feel bad about herself was not speaking or acting truthfully with her.
In the meantime, look for every positive thing you can in her. Is she pretty? Tell her so, even if she doesn't believe it, but don't push it. Is she good at certain things. Praise her, when appropriate, but don't overdo it....
Take her to nice places, let her know you are happy to be with her - even when you wish inside that she would cheer up 'cos she is making you miserable as well....
Above all, stay positive yourself. I YOU get down you won't be any help to her.
Hope this helps.

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Old 09-17-2001, 12:06 AM   #9
250
Horus - Egyptian Sky God
 

Join Date: March 4, 2001
Location: either CA or MO
Age: 42
Posts: 2,674
Quote:
Originally posted by Grand-Ranger:
Talk to her,250.

Explain what she is doing to her. Its hard, I know. But that seems to be the only option here. Spend alot of time with her, try to make her feel beter.

Thats my advice.

you see, that is the problem, whenever I suggest that she can tell me something about herself, she went CRAZY

...

I just have to have faith...

anyone had similar experiences here? anyone?
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Old 09-17-2001, 12:09 AM   #10
250
Horus - Egyptian Sky God
 

Join Date: March 4, 2001
Location: either CA or MO
Age: 42
Posts: 2,674
Quote:
Originally posted by Fljotsdale:
250, she doesn't love herself. You have to find out why, if you can. She will neve be happy if she doesn't think she is a worthwhile person, and if she doesn't love herself.
It is no good you TELLING her she is loveable and worthwhile. She has to discover WHY she feels bad about herself, THEN she, with help, can start to see that whoever MADE her feel bad about herself was not speaking or acting truthfully with her.
In the meantime, look for every positive thing you can in her. Is she pretty? Tell her so, even if she doesn't believe it, but don't push it. Is she good at certain things. Praise her, when appropriate, but don't overdo it....
Take her to nice places, let her know you are happy to be with her - even when you wish inside that she would cheer up 'cos she is making you miserable as well....
Above all, stay positive yourself. I YOU get down you won't be any help to her.
Hope this helps.

OMG!! that might be it!

one sec, let me read carefully, I will reply later, but THANKS SO MUCH. are you experienced in this? can you give me some more professional suggestions please? maybe some books? some website? ANYTHING! thank you thank you thank you!!
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