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Old 01-26-2005, 08:31 AM   #1
Paladin2000
Fzoul Chembryl
 

Join Date: February 19, 2002
Location: Your guess is as good as mine.
Age: 52
Posts: 1,728
Smiley

1. Symptom: Cold and humid feet.
Cause: Glass is being held at incorrect angle.
Cure: Maneuver glass until open end is facing upward.

2. Symptom: Warm and humid feet.
Cause: You pissed your pants.
Cure: Dry yourself at nearest restroom.

3. Symptom: The wall facing you is full of lights.
Cause: You're lying on the floor.
Cure: Position your body at a 90-degree angle to the floor.

4. Symptom: The floor looks blurry.
Cause: You're looking through an empty glass.
Cure: Quickly refill with your favorite beverage.

5. Symptom: The floor is moving.
Cause: You're being dragged away.
Cure: At least ask where they're taking you.

6. Symptom: You see multiple reflections of your face.
Cause: You're trying to puke in the toilet.
Cure: Stick your finger in your mouth.

7. Symptom: You hear echoes every time someone speaks.
Cause: You have your glass on your ear.
Cure: Stop making an ass of yourself.

8. Symptom: The room is shaking a lot, everyone is dressed in white and the music is very repetitive.
Cause: You're in an ambulance.
Cure: Don't move. Let the professionals do their job.

9. Symptom: Your dad and all your brothers are looking at you funny.
Cause: You're in the wrong house.
Cure: Ask if they can point you to your house.

10. Symptom: A huge light is blinding you.
Cause: You woke up in someone's lawn.
Cure: Coffee and a long nap.

Joke taken/borrowed from AskMen.com

[ 01-26-2005, 08:33 AM: Message edited by: Paladin2000 ]
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Old 01-26-2005, 11:27 AM   #2
VulcanRider
Lord Soth
 

Join Date: July 25, 2002
Location: Melbourne FL
Age: 59
Posts: 1,971
Symptom: The "lingerie model" you picked up is wearing underwear larger than yours.
Cause: You have beer goggles.
Cure: Enjoy yourself, then leave quickly or risk having to gnaw your arm off in the morning.
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Old 01-26-2005, 11:35 AM   #3
Xen
Symbol of Moradin
 

Join Date: June 5, 2002
Location: Slovenia,Ljubljana
Age: 36
Posts: 8,554
They are good, but it didn't make me laugh.
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Old 01-26-2005, 12:32 PM   #4
Blunderbuss
Zhentarim Guard
 

Join Date: October 11, 2004
Location: England
Posts: 328
lol. The first was the best.
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Old 01-26-2005, 03:33 PM   #5
Kakero
40th Level Warrior
 

Join Date: March 24, 2002
Posts: 10,215
I wonder if Johnny get all those symptoms. [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img]
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Old 01-26-2005, 03:42 PM   #6
Sythe
Ra
 

Join Date: May 19, 2002
Location: The US of A
Age: 35
Posts: 2,365
LOL Kakero [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img]
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Old 01-26-2005, 04:48 PM   #7
krunchyfrogg
Red Dragon
 

Join Date: February 14, 2004
Location: NY, USA
Age: 48
Posts: 1,516
Thanks.
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