The Lanesra & Donut English Sports Thread - Page 2

Davros · 01-04-2002, 10:09 AM

quote:
Originally posted by Donut:

What a great idea for a thread Lanesra. I like your style!

Did you see the World Championship darts last night. Down to the last four and they are all English! If we had had Phil Taylor at the Battle of Hastings the French could have gone home.

I see that Tim Henman is through to the last 8 of the Ausralian Hard Court championship in Adelaide, Australia. We seem to get success in the most remote areas of the world.

I also notice that Australia have had to withdraw from the Hopalong Cup because the World Number 1, Lleyton Orient, has caught chickenpox. Ouch - those children's diseases really hurt you don't they. [img]smile.gif[/img] Apparently he is stuck in a small town called Perth. I looked it up in my atlas, it's in Scotland!

Don't forget, if you ever need a kidney or some bone marrow give me a ring.

There we were discussing the cricket, when WHOOSH, someone goes and switches the topic to darts. Yes, Phil Taylor rules in that arena - nough said. Now back to the cricket....... [img]smile.gif[/img]

Timmy's back huh - just another flash in the pan - maybe make it as far as the quarters - winning just isn't his style. LOL, Leyton's staying in Perth huh - well I hope he doesn't stay at the Scone Airport Hotel like I did a couple of months ago - what a dive. Sure was a step down from Gleneagles, Turnberry, and the Lodge at Pebble Beach

.

Lanesra · 01-04-2002, 10:48 AM

Four English semi finalists in the world darts again it's no fun anymore.Just an idea but why don't the Aussies join with another little country say, New Zealand and try to give Phil and the boys a decent game

Scholarcs · 01-04-2002, 08:50 PM

quote:
Originally posted by Lanesra:
Four English semi finalists in the world darts again it's no fun anymore.Just an idea but why don't the Aussies join with another little country say, New Zealand and try to give Phil and the boys a decent game

Why ever would we want to join with Australia?

[img]tongue.gif[/img]

LennonCook · 01-04-2002, 11:37 PM

If the Aussie and NZ teams merged, wed have to kick out alot of good players. Keep Oz Ozzie!!!

Donut · 01-05-2002, 10:03 AM

Tim Henman is in the final. He is playing some Greek bloke called Philllllipppppppoussssssus.

As for Australia & NZ I thought that was the same place anyway.

Lanesra · 01-06-2002, 07:51 AM

GO TIMMY,GO TIMMY ,WHO IS [img]graemlins/2gunfire.gif[/img] Phillip Rousoss anyway?

Davros · 01-06-2002, 09:18 AM

Davros casts "Negate Smugness +3" on Donut. Spell riccochets to Lanesra, and his remaining hair falls out. Whoops, sorrrry

, I should have known better than to attempt to deprive Donut of one of his prime emotions

. I better stick to Darts [img]smile.gif[/img] .

Donut · 01-06-2002, 07:21 PM

Henmam beat the Greek bloke in three sets!

More good news - apparently there is another World Darts Championship started this weekend.

Mouse · 01-12-2002, 08:20 AM

Enough of this sillines - lets get back on topic

Here we are..................... Football 2002 in a nutshell

JANUARY:

Actress Elizabeth Hurley tells a shocked world that the father of her unborn child is Ipswich Town's manager, and that the tot will be given the surname Hurley-Burley.

Dance music magazine Mixmag reveals the result of their search for the person who has attended the greatest number of different clubs in the past 12 months. The winner is Steve Bruce.

FEBRUARY:

Bolton's slide down the Premiership table is explained when it is discovered that opposing defenders have been taking Vitamin D tablets to counteract the effects of Ricketts...

Disappointing ticket sales for the Spice Girls' reunion tour begin to soar when it is announced that, in tribute to her husband, Victoria Beckham will start the concert on the bench.

MARCH:

Paul Ince is arrested for leaving the scene of an accident after Arsene Wenger catches the Middlesbrough captain crashing into his 2CV, causing damage to the front bumper. However the case collapses when, in court, Wenger admits: "I did not see the Incey dent".

The search for Osama Bin Laden switches to Craven Cottage amid rumours that the Al-Qaeda leader is trying to make contact with the sinister Al-Fayeda network.

APRIL:

Elizabeth Hurley gives birth to a baby daughter whose head is covered in ringlets. She is christened Curly Girly Hurley-Burley.

In another shock example of footballers behaving badly, the man who adds up the attendance figures at Anfield is assaulted by Liverpool stars. Says proud Phil Thompson: "My lads are the best counter-attacking side in football".

MAY:

Blaming Leicester's relegation on a muscle-bound striker who doesn't score any goals, Dave Bassett finally sells Ade Akinbiyi. He immediately pays £10m to take Emile Heskey back from Liverpool.

Arsenal win the title but at least Teddy Sheringham and Les Ferdinand book Tottenham's place in Europe. They'll be going on a cheese-tasting coach trip round Belgium with Saga.

JUNE:

Following three straight defeats by Cameroon, Germany and Saudi Arabia, distraught Ireland boss Mick McCarthy flies home straight after the World Cup's first round. Impressed, the Scottish FA immediately offer him Craig Brown's old job.

England's campaign ends in farce, all 23 players ruled out with food poisoning after Kieron Dyer persuades them to visit a South Korean restaurant. "I heard there were some tasty old dogs there," he sheepishly explains.

JULY:

In the annual pre-season spending spree, Arsenal chairman David Dein raids Inter Milan for Ronaldo, Liverpool chairman David Moores raids Real Madrid for Roberto Carlos and Aston Villa chairman Doug Ellis raids Burnley for some second-hand kit so he won't have to fork out for a new set.

Middlesbrough's manager returns to Old Trafford as Manchester United's new boss after Sir Alex Ferguson is overheard saying he's "looking forward to spending a lot more time with McClaren". An even-redder-faced-than-usual Fergie later admits what he'd actually said was "I'm looking forward to spending a lot more time with ma Claret"

AUGUST:

The new season begins with Liverpool kicking off in front of a capacity crowd at Anfield, Manchester United kicking off in front of an expectant Old Trafford and Leeds United kicking off in front of the Majestyk night-club.

The Queen Mother celebrates her 102nd birthday with a telemessage from Bobby Robson.

SEPTEMBER:

The hunt for Bin Laden appears over when the FBI arrests a much-disliked bearded man who achieved infamy for wrecking the twin towers. Sadly, Ken Bates is later released without charge.

Dennis Wise joins Fulham, then refuses to play anywhere other than up front. This gives the Cottagers a forward line of Steve Marlet and Cockney Rebel.

OCTOBER:

Just six weeks into the season, newly-promoted Manchester City are losing each game by an average score of 7-4. Shell-shocked boss Kevin Keegan reveals he is considering tinkering with his revolutionary 0-0-10 formation or, as a compromise, asking Shaun Goater to play as a fly goalie.

Ariel Sharon names Dwight Yorke as Israel's new defence minister after his successful incursions into Jordan.

NOVEMBER:

The Queen Mother dies and as a mark of respect, Chelsea players on a drinking session lower their trousers to half-mast.

Walter Smith leaves Everton, saying he needs more job security. He immediately becomes CEO of a leading Internet company.

DECEMBER:

As Christmas approaches, kindly Robbie Savage promises he'll try his best to make sure that everyone who tackles him gets a card, though whether it turns out to be yellow or red will depend on how gullible the referee is.

A police report reveals a huge increase in drunk and disorderly arrests at Upton Park. Glenn Roeder says West Ham will try to hold their Christmas party elsewhere next year.

Donut · 01-12-2002, 10:28 AM

quote:
Originally posted by Mouse:
Enough of this sillines - lets get back on topic

Here we are..................... Football 2002 in a nutshell

MAY:

Arsenal win the title but at least Teddy Sheringham and Les Ferdinand book Tottenham's place in Europe. They'll be going on a cheese-tasting coach trip round Belgium with Saga.

I like the look of May Mouse, I hope you are right.

[ 01-12-2002: Message edited by: Donut ]

01-04-2002, 10:09 AM	#11
Davros Takhisis Follower Join Date: January 7, 2001 Location: Mandurah, West Australia Age: 60 Posts: 5,073	quote: Originally posted by Donut: What a great idea for a thread Lanesra. I like your style! Did you see the World Championship darts last night. Down to the last four and they are all English! If we had had Phil Taylor at the Battle of Hastings the French could have gone home. I see that Tim Henman is through to the last 8 of the Ausralian Hard Court championship in Adelaide, Australia. We seem to get success in the most remote areas of the world. I also notice that Australia have had to withdraw from the Hopalong Cup because the World Number 1, Lleyton Orient, has caught chickenpox. Ouch - those children's diseases really hurt you don't they. [img]smile.gif[/img] Apparently he is stuck in a small town called Perth. I looked it up in my atlas, it's in Scotland! Don't forget, if you ever need a kidney or some bone marrow give me a ring. There we were discussing the cricket, when WHOOSH, someone goes and switches the topic to darts. Yes, Phil Taylor rules in that arena - nough said. Now back to the cricket....... [img]smile.gif[/img] Timmy's back huh - just another flash in the pan - maybe make it as far as the quarters - winning just isn't his style. LOL, Leyton's staying in Perth huh - well I hope he doesn't stay at the Scone Airport Hotel like I did a couple of months ago - what a dive. Sure was a step down from Gleneagles, Turnberry, and the Lodge at Pebble Beach . __________________ Davros was right - just ask JD

01-04-2002, 08:50 PM	#13
Scholarcs Red Dragon Join Date: December 5, 2001 Location: Auckland, New Zealand Age: 38 Posts: 1,557	quote: Originally posted by Lanesra: Four English semi finalists in the world darts again it's no fun anymore.Just an idea but why don't the Aussies join with another little country say, New Zealand and try to give Phil and the boys a decent game Why ever would we want to join with Australia? [img]tongue.gif[/img]

01-05-2002, 10:03 AM	#15
Donut Jack Burton Join Date: March 1, 2001 Location: Airstrip One Age: 40 Posts: 5,571	Tim Henman is in the final. He is playing some Greek bloke called Philllllipppppppoussssssus. As for Australia & NZ I thought that was the same place anyway. __________________ [img]\"http://www.wheatsheaf.freeserve.co.uk/roastspurs.gif\" alt=\" - \" /> <br />Proud member of the Axis of Upheaval<br />Official Titterer of the Laughing Hyenas<br />Josiah Bartlet - the best President the US never had.<br />The 1st D in the D & D Show

01-06-2002, 09:18 AM	#17
Davros Takhisis Follower Join Date: January 7, 2001 Location: Mandurah, West Australia Age: 60 Posts: 5,073	Davros casts "Negate Smugness +3" on Donut. Spell riccochets to Lanesra, and his remaining hair falls out. Whoops, sorrrry , I should have known better than to attempt to deprive Donut of one of his prime emotions . I better stick to Darts [img]smile.gif[/img] . __________________ Davros was right - just ask JD

01-06-2002, 07:21 PM	#18
Donut Jack Burton Join Date: March 1, 2001 Location: Airstrip One Age: 40 Posts: 5,571	Henmam beat the Greek bloke in three sets! More good news - apparently there is another World Darts Championship started this weekend. __________________ [img]\"http://www.wheatsheaf.freeserve.co.uk/roastspurs.gif\" alt=\" - \" /> <br />Proud member of the Axis of Upheaval<br />Official Titterer of the Laughing Hyenas<br />Josiah Bartlet - the best President the US never had.<br />The 1st D in the D & D Show

01-04-2002, 10:48 AM	#12
Lanesra Symbol of Cyric Join Date: March 29, 2001 Location: Twititania, Europe Age: 63 Posts: 1,221	Four English semi finalists in the world darts again it's no fun anymore.Just an idea but why don't the Aussies join with another little country say, New Zealand and try to give Phil and the boys a decent game

01-04-2002, 11:37 PM	#14
LennonCook Jack Burton Join Date: November 10, 2001 Location: Bathurst & Orange, in constant flux Age: 37 Posts: 5,452	If the Aussie and NZ teams merged, wed have to kick out alot of good players. Keep Oz Ozzie!!!

01-06-2002, 07:51 AM	#16
Lanesra Symbol of Cyric Join Date: March 29, 2001 Location: Twititania, Europe Age: 63 Posts: 1,221	GO TIMMY,GO TIMMY ,WHO IS [img]graemlins/2gunfire.gif[/img] Phillip Rousoss anyway?

01-12-2002, 08:20 AM	#19
Mouse Ironworks Moderator Join Date: March 1, 2001 Location: Scotland Posts: 2,788	Enough of this sillines - lets get back on topic Here we are..................... Football 2002 in a nutshell JANUARY: Actress Elizabeth Hurley tells a shocked world that the father of her unborn child is Ipswich Town's manager, and that the tot will be given the surname Hurley-Burley. Dance music magazine Mixmag reveals the result of their search for the person who has attended the greatest number of different clubs in the past 12 months. The winner is Steve Bruce. FEBRUARY: Bolton's slide down the Premiership table is explained when it is discovered that opposing defenders have been taking Vitamin D tablets to counteract the effects of Ricketts... Disappointing ticket sales for the Spice Girls' reunion tour begin to soar when it is announced that, in tribute to her husband, Victoria Beckham will start the concert on the bench. MARCH: Paul Ince is arrested for leaving the scene of an accident after Arsene Wenger catches the Middlesbrough captain crashing into his 2CV, causing damage to the front bumper. However the case collapses when, in court, Wenger admits: "I did not see the Incey dent". The search for Osama Bin Laden switches to Craven Cottage amid rumours that the Al-Qaeda leader is trying to make contact with the sinister Al-Fayeda network. APRIL: Elizabeth Hurley gives birth to a baby daughter whose head is covered in ringlets. She is christened Curly Girly Hurley-Burley. In another shock example of footballers behaving badly, the man who adds up the attendance figures at Anfield is assaulted by Liverpool stars. Says proud Phil Thompson: "My lads are the best counter-attacking side in football". MAY: Blaming Leicester's relegation on a muscle-bound striker who doesn't score any goals, Dave Bassett finally sells Ade Akinbiyi. He immediately pays £10m to take Emile Heskey back from Liverpool. Arsenal win the title but at least Teddy Sheringham and Les Ferdinand book Tottenham's place in Europe. They'll be going on a cheese-tasting coach trip round Belgium with Saga. JUNE: Following three straight defeats by Cameroon, Germany and Saudi Arabia, distraught Ireland boss Mick McCarthy flies home straight after the World Cup's first round. Impressed, the Scottish FA immediately offer him Craig Brown's old job. England's campaign ends in farce, all 23 players ruled out with food poisoning after Kieron Dyer persuades them to visit a South Korean restaurant. "I heard there were some tasty old dogs there," he sheepishly explains. JULY: In the annual pre-season spending spree, Arsenal chairman David Dein raids Inter Milan for Ronaldo, Liverpool chairman David Moores raids Real Madrid for Roberto Carlos and Aston Villa chairman Doug Ellis raids Burnley for some second-hand kit so he won't have to fork out for a new set. Middlesbrough's manager returns to Old Trafford as Manchester United's new boss after Sir Alex Ferguson is overheard saying he's "looking forward to spending a lot more time with McClaren". An even-redder-faced-than-usual Fergie later admits what he'd actually said was "I'm looking forward to spending a lot more time with ma Claret" AUGUST: The new season begins with Liverpool kicking off in front of a capacity crowd at Anfield, Manchester United kicking off in front of an expectant Old Trafford and Leeds United kicking off in front of the Majestyk night-club. The Queen Mother celebrates her 102nd birthday with a telemessage from Bobby Robson. SEPTEMBER: The hunt for Bin Laden appears over when the FBI arrests a much-disliked bearded man who achieved infamy for wrecking the twin towers. Sadly, Ken Bates is later released without charge. Dennis Wise joins Fulham, then refuses to play anywhere other than up front. This gives the Cottagers a forward line of Steve Marlet and Cockney Rebel. OCTOBER: Just six weeks into the season, newly-promoted Manchester City are losing each game by an average score of 7-4. Shell-shocked boss Kevin Keegan reveals he is considering tinkering with his revolutionary 0-0-10 formation or, as a compromise, asking Shaun Goater to play as a fly goalie. Ariel Sharon names Dwight Yorke as Israel's new defence minister after his successful incursions into Jordan. NOVEMBER: The Queen Mother dies and as a mark of respect, Chelsea players on a drinking session lower their trousers to half-mast. Walter Smith leaves Everton, saying he needs more job security. He immediately becomes CEO of a leading Internet company. DECEMBER: As Christmas approaches, kindly Robbie Savage promises he'll try his best to make sure that everyone who tackles him gets a card, though whether it turns out to be yellow or red will depend on how gullible the referee is. A police report reveals a huge increase in drunk and disorderly arrests at Upton Park. Glenn Roeder says West Ham will try to hold their Christmas party elsewhere next year. __________________ Regards Mouse (Occasional crooner and all round friendly Scottish rodent)

01-12-2002, 10:28 AM	#20
Donut Jack Burton Join Date: March 1, 2001 Location: Airstrip One Age: 40 Posts: 5,571	quote: Originally posted by Mouse: Enough of this sillines - lets get back on topic Here we are..................... Football 2002 in a nutshell MAY: Arsenal win the title but at least Teddy Sheringham and Les Ferdinand book Tottenham's place in Europe. They'll be going on a cheese-tasting coach trip round Belgium with Saga. I like the look of May Mouse, I hope you are right. [ 01-12-2002: Message edited by: Donut ] __________________ [img]\"http://www.wheatsheaf.freeserve.co.uk/roastspurs.gif\" alt=\" - \" /> <br />Proud member of the Axis of Upheaval<br />Official Titterer of the Laughing Hyenas<br />Josiah Bartlet - the best President the US never had.<br />The 1st D in the D & D Show

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads
Thread	Thread Starter	Forum	Replies	Last Post
Australian Sports Thread	Donut	General Conversation Archives (11/2000 - 01/2005)	30	04-22-2004 09:27 AM
The Donut & Lanesra Rugby Thread!	Donut	General Conversation Archives (11/2000 - 01/2005)	14	11-26-2003 05:05 PM
Oi Donut, Lanesra, Charlie, Nigel	Davros	General Conversation Archives (11/2000 - 01/2005)	40	10-21-2003 05:58 PM
Donut & Lanesra's Moroccan Sports Thread	Donut	General Conversation Archives (11/2000 - 01/2005)	42	01-25-2003 09:07 AM
The Aelia and Davros Aussie Sports Thread	Aelia Jusa	General Conversation Archives (11/2000 - 01/2005)	125	02-01-2002 05:31 AM