Sleeping in church

Dron_Cah · 11-22-2004, 05:21 PM

Sleeping in Church

A man goes to the minister at his church. "Reverend," he said, we have a problem. My wife keeps falling asleep during your sermons. It's very embarrassing, not to mention disrespectful. What can I do?

"I've noticed this and have an idea if you're up to the task," said the minister. "Take this hatpin with you. I can see when Mrs. Jones is sleeping, and I will motion to you. When I motion, you give her a good poke in the leg
with the hatpin."

In church the following Sunday, Mrs. Jones dozed off. Noticing this, the preacher put his plan to work. "And who made the ultimate sacrifice for you?" he said, nodding to Mr. Jones. "Jesus!" Mrs. Jones cried out as her
husband jabbed her in the leg with the sharp .... hatpin. "Yes! You are correct, Mrs. Jones!" came the minister 's quick reply.

Mrs. Jones then turned and glared angrily at her husband. Soon, Mrs. Jones again nodded off.. The minister noticed. "Who is your redeemer?" he asked the congregation, motioning toward Mr. Jones. "My God!" howled Mrs. Jones as she was stuck again with the pin. "Right again!" bellowed the minister, a slight grin on his face.

Mrs. Jones again gave her husband a real hard threatening glare. Before long though she again nodded off. This time however the minister did not notice. As he picked up the tempo of his sermon, he made a few hand gestures that Mr. Jones mistook as signals to sharply poke his wife with the hatpin again. The minister asked, "And what did Eve say to Adam after she bore him his 99th son?"

Mrs. Jones jumped up and shouted, "You stick that thing in me one more time and I'll break it in half and shove it where the sun don't shine!"

"Amen!" replied ALL the women in the congregation.

RoSs_bg2_rox · 11-22-2004, 05:28 PM

HAHA. Good one!

Although I'm sure I saw it a couple of months ago.

Nice references to God though [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img]

dplax · 11-22-2004, 05:29 PM

Great one Dron! Had me laughing for a minute or two.

Link · 11-22-2004, 05:30 PM

LMAO

[img]graemlins/biglaugh.gif[/img] Great one! [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img]

Variol (Farseer) Elmwood · 11-22-2004, 06:45 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by dplax:
Great one Dron! Had me laughing for a minute or two.

Hey d, I sent you a PM, did you get it, or did it go right into your trash?

Variol (Farseer) Elmwood · 11-22-2004, 06:46 PM

Oh, and as for this thread..

REPAINT YOU THINNER!!

dplax · 11-22-2004, 06:50 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Variol (Farseer) Elmwood:

quote:
Originally posted by dplax:
Great one Dron! Had me laughing for a minute or two.

Hey d, I sent you a PM, did you get it, or did it go right into your trash? [/QUOTE]I did not get any pm from you. I'll check whether my pm box is full.

EDIT: nope, only 27 messages in there. It can take 60. Try sending it again.

[ 11-22-2004, 06:51 PM: Message edited by: dplax ]

Dron_Cah · 11-22-2004, 07:19 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Variol (Farseer) Elmwood:
Oh, and as for this thread..

REPAINT YOU THINNER!!

Uh, what are you talking about, man?

The Hierophant · 11-22-2004, 07:37 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Dron_Cah:

quote:
Originally posted by Variol (Farseer) Elmwood:
Oh, and as for this thread..

REPAINT YOU THINNER!!

Uh, what are you talking about, man? [/QUOTE]'repent you sinner!' , said with a comical reference to painting products

Dron_Cah · 11-22-2004, 08:42 PM

Ah, I see. What brought on the paint puns? [img]smile.gif[/img]

11-22-2004, 05:28 PM	#2
RoSs_bg2_rox Zartan Join Date: May 20, 2003 Location: Near Aberdeen, Scotland Age: 34 Posts: 5,225	HAHA. Good one! Although I'm sure I saw it a couple of months ago. Nice references to God though [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img] __________________ [img]\"http://img.ranchoweb.com/images/ladyzekke/dragonwater2.gif\" alt=\" - \" />

11-22-2004, 05:29 PM	#3
dplax Jack Burton Join Date: July 19, 2003 Location: an expat living in France Age: 38 Posts: 5,577	Great one Dron! Had me laughing for a minute or two. __________________

11-22-2004, 05:30 PM	#4
Link Jack Burton Join Date: May 15, 2001 Location: The Netherlands Age: 39 Posts: 5,888	LMAO [img]graemlins/biglaugh.gif[/img] Great one! [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img] __________________ Rowing is not a sport, it's a way of life Goal: Beijing 2008

11-22-2004, 06:46 PM	#6
Variol (Farseer) Elmwood Jack Burton Join Date: May 16, 2003 Location: Dartmouth, NS Canada Age: 58 Posts: 5,634	Oh, and as for this thread.. REPAINT YOU THINNER!! __________________ A MAN WHO WANTS FOR NOTHING HAS INFINITE WEALTH. (me)

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11-22-2004, 05:21 PM	#1
Dron_Cah Horus - Egyptian Sky God Join Date: March 2, 2003 Location: Kentucky Age: 37 Posts: 2,637	Sleeping in Church A man goes to the minister at his church. "Reverend," he said, we have a problem. My wife keeps falling asleep during your sermons. It's very embarrassing, not to mention disrespectful. What can I do? "I've noticed this and have an idea if you're up to the task," said the minister. "Take this hatpin with you. I can see when Mrs. Jones is sleeping, and I will motion to you. When I motion, you give her a good poke in the leg with the hatpin." In church the following Sunday, Mrs. Jones dozed off. Noticing this, the preacher put his plan to work. "And who made the ultimate sacrifice for you?" he said, nodding to Mr. Jones. "Jesus!" Mrs. Jones cried out as her husband jabbed her in the leg with the sharp .... hatpin. "Yes! You are correct, Mrs. Jones!" came the minister 's quick reply. Mrs. Jones then turned and glared angrily at her husband. Soon, Mrs. Jones again nodded off.. The minister noticed. "Who is your redeemer?" he asked the congregation, motioning toward Mr. Jones. "My God!" howled Mrs. Jones as she was stuck again with the pin. "Right again!" bellowed the minister, a slight grin on his face. Mrs. Jones again gave her husband a real hard threatening glare. Before long though she again nodded off. This time however the minister did not notice. As he picked up the tempo of his sermon, he made a few hand gestures that Mr. Jones mistook as signals to sharply poke his wife with the hatpin again. The minister asked, "And what did Eve say to Adam after she bore him his 99th son?" Mrs. Jones jumped up and shouted, "You stick that thing in me one more time and I'll break it in half and shove it where the sun don't shine!" "Amen!" replied ALL the women in the congregation.

11-22-2004, 08:42 PM	#10
Dron_Cah Horus - Egyptian Sky God Join Date: March 2, 2003 Location: Kentucky Age: 37 Posts: 2,637	Ah, I see. What brought on the paint puns? [img]smile.gif[/img]

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