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Old 03-11-2001, 12:17 PM   #31
Cloudbringer
Ironworks Moderator
 

Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Upstate NY USA
Posts: 19,737
I'm baaaaack! And here is another for your perusal and amusement...a joke, actually, but hey, it's MY corner! LOL
teeheehee

-----
As soon as she had finished convent school, a bright young
girl named Lena shook the dust of Ireland off her shoes and
made her way to New York where before long, she became a
successful performer in show business.

Eventually she returned to her home town for a visit and on a
Saturday night went to confession in the church, which she
had always attended as a child.

In the confessional Father Sullivan recognized her and began
asking her about her work. She explained that she was an
acrobatic dancer, and he wanted to know what that meant.

She said she would be happy to show him the kind of thing
she did on stage.

She stepped out of the confessional and within sight of Father
Sullivan, she went into a series of cartwheels, leaping splits,
handsprings and backflips.

Kneeling near the confessional, waiting their turn, were two
middle-aged ladies. They witnessed Lena's acrobatics with
wide eyes, and one said to the other: "Will you just look at the
penance Father Sullivan is givin' out this night, and me without
me bloomers on!"
~~~~~~

TeeheeheeCloud
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Old 03-11-2001, 12:20 PM   #32
Moridin
Fzoul Chembryl
 

Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Minneapolis, MN
Posts: 1,735
ROFLMAO! Keep em coming CB!



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Old 03-11-2001, 12:25 PM   #33
Cloudbringer
Ironworks Moderator
 

Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Upstate NY USA
Posts: 19,737
Teehee! I'm going to let some other good and amusing souls add some things for a bit! My archive of fun-stuff got massively purged a while back and there isn't much left...I'll start saving it again for sure! Maybe we'll make Cloudy's Corner happen off and on, hmmm?

And I'm still in stitches over Charlie's stuff..hahahahahaha
And Moridin..park on a driveway, drive on a parkway...that's amusing! Never considered it!

CB

[This message has been edited by Cloudbringer (edited 03-11-2001).]
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Old 03-11-2001, 12:26 PM   #34
Ladyzekke
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Join Date: January 7, 2001
Location: Virginia, U.S.A.
Age: 57
Posts: 9,005
HAHA!! CB - bloomers?

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Old 03-11-2001, 12:36 PM   #35
Cloudbringer
Ironworks Moderator
 

Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Upstate NY USA
Posts: 19,737
You enjoying this thread, LadyZ? I have personally tried the telemarketer replies: (apologies to jj, but well, what can I say?!)

2. If they start out with, "How are you today?" say, "I'm so
glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I have all
these problems. My arthritis is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my
dog just died . . . " the caller ends up dazed and confused... spamTALK ,it's not just for forums! bwahahahaha

3. If they say they're John Doe from XYZ Company, ask them to
spell their name. Then ask them to spell the company name. Then ask
them where it is located, how long it has been in business, how many
people work there, how they got into this line of work if they
are married, how many kids they have, etc. Continue asking them
personal questions or questions about their company for as long as
necessary. Now, ladyZ, this one was hysterical! The caller was on his knees begging me to stop before he hung up the phone! That'll teach em to ignore three requests to stop calling me to buy a timeshare in Fl!

CB


[This message has been edited by Cloudbringer (edited 03-11-2001).]
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Old 03-11-2001, 01:36 PM   #36
Moiraine
Anubis
 

Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Up in the Freedomland Alps
Age: 59
Posts: 2,474
Donut, I never said that I was sure that the story I told was true - but it was funny enough to deserve to be true !

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Old 03-11-2001, 01:49 PM   #37
Donut
Jack Burton
 

Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Airstrip One
Age: 39
Posts: 5,571
Absolutement. I was merely pointing out the coincidence that I had seen this on another site this morning.

The beauty of Urban Myths is that they are always told as if they are true. They usually start with something like 'My friend knows someone who ....'



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The Truth is in the Profile
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Old 03-11-2001, 03:06 PM   #38
Cloudbringer
Ironworks Moderator
 

Join Date: March 1, 2001
Location: Upstate NY USA
Posts: 19,737
HEHEHE (another one from my warped friends who are techno-wizkids)

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and
noticed that the new program began making unexpected changes
to the accounting modules, limiting access to flower and
jewelry applications that had operated flawlessly under
Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable
programs, such as Romance 9.9, installed undesirable programs
such as NFL 5.0 and NBA 3.0. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs
and Cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried
running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.


Dear Desperate,

Keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package,
while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Try to enter the command: C:/ I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and
install Tears 6.2. Husband 1.0 should then automatically run
these applications: Guilty 3.0 and Flowers 7.0. But remember,
overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to GrumpySilence
2.5, Happyhour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad
program that will create "Snoring Loudly" wave files. DO NOT
install MotherInLaw 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend
program. These are not supported applications and will crash
Husband 1.0. In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but
it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications
quickly. Consider buying additional software to improve
performance. I personally recommend HotFood 3.0 and Lingerie
5.3.

Tech Support
---------


CloudCustomer, wondering where you buy Boyfriend 5.0?! LOL

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Storm-Queen
Purple Rose of the Black Knight
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Old 03-11-2001, 03:48 PM   #39
turbovee
Elminster
 

Join Date: March 2, 2001
Location: Eglin AFB Florida
Posts: 471
My own anedote:

If common sense was so common why doesn't everyone have it?






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I feel the need, the need for SPEED!
Peace and hair grease
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Old 03-11-2001, 03:50 PM   #40
turbovee
Elminster
 

Join Date: March 2, 2001
Location: Eglin AFB Florida
Posts: 471
Damn! and I was so trying not to get those 3 blue stars.

------------------
I feel the need, the need for SPEED!
Peace and hair grease
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