My need to post

[onthepequod]

Tonight I feel the need to wax reflective and an even stronger need to express myself in written form. So please bear with any spelling mistakes, etc.. as I am just attempting to reflect on my evening for my own benefit as much as to communicate my observations to anyone taking time to read this.

First I would like to begin by saying: Charlie, I don't know you but I happened to read your post today and would like to address you if you're still around. I truly believe that we all have our struggles they just take different forms. And while man (yes I am using this collectively, so if you are offended please forgive - it is not my intent) may strive to justify his own actions by pointing out actions of another that are "worse," I honestly believe that we all possess the same ability to be base. Infact, I find those that elevate themselves or justify their own actions by dwelling on the actions of other to be shallow and cowardly. I have my own skeletons, while they may be different from yours and perhaps not as risky, they are issues I need to deal with in my life and deserve every bit of attention I can muster. What I am trying to say, is that I do not consider you among the dreggs of humanity. On the contrary, I appreciate the fact that you have been honest and are struggling to deal with the issues in your life. From one who is struggling with his own issues; God bless you, God keep you, and may God deliver you from the issues in your life.

Now, on to what I came to write about. First, as you have probably noticed I am religious so if this offends you, you can stop here because my faith will only become more evident, or you can continue on, your choice. But understand this, I am not here to enter into a theological debate. That said, my reflection upon this evening requires some backgound. My wife and I live in a major metropolitan area in the U.S. This last year my wife was blessed with the opportunity to teach in an inner-city private christian school. Approximately half of the children in this school come from poor families. By poor I do not mean below what we in the U.S. consider poverty level but I mean truly poor. For example, most of these poor families live in dwellings that are one or two rooms with facilities (i.e. bathrooms and kitchens) that most of those below poverty level in the U.S. (and yes I know we are spoiled in the U.S) would consider completely disheveld. In fact, these dwellings would be more in keeping with third world dwellings. Children from these poorer families are able to go to this school thanks to generous sponsors.

Tonight, I was fortunate enough to attend their school program and have been touched in ways that have moved me deeply and in ways that I have found disheartening. However, since I tend to migrate toward the melancholy I am going to dwell on that which disheartened me. First and foremost I believe the line between fortunate (financially) and poor is merely a distinction not determined by us but by how gentle life, and I believe God, has been to us. Granted you can argue that when times were tough you pulled yourself up by your bootstraps and made something out of a rotten situation. But were you born into a life of poverty with one parent addicted to drugs, engaged in prostitution or were you yourself sold into prostitution (male or female) at an early age? We all like to think we are tough troopers but the fact remains we all could have been born into a situation that we could not have extricated ourselves from. For reasons like these I see social stratification as mere stations in life that we ultimatly had no control over. Secondly, I believe that there are many impoverished that demand respect because of how they choose to live their lives in the face of their station and the sacrifices they make for their children and the sacrifices they make for what they believe to be right.

What has disheartened me is my observation of those children whose parents choose to live their lives irrespective of their children. Tonight I had the chance to observe children that do not know their parents because one may be in prison while the other may be involved in prostitution in order to feed a drug habit (generalities are all I am willing to offer). I also saw children, who may go an entire day without food (because fixing a meal for their child inconveniences the parent too much), look longingly at their parent desiring, with every once of their being, one moment of approval and a loving gesture. Yet these children never seem to dwell on what they do not have, they just try to make the most of it. If I were only so noble in the face of staggering adversity. These children lead a life that I cannot begin to fathom. These young impressionable children live in squallor, in a truly dangerous environment, usually begin taking care of themselves (fixing meals etc...) at a young age (i.e. 4 - because nobody else will), are usually starved for any attention, and on top of that face unfavorable odds because of the environment that have yet to grow up in. This is truly a sad and humbling thing to observe and for me has been insightful (into my own soul). God bless and keep these children.

I apologize if I have ruined anyone's mood. I just needed to articulate this somewhere and this board was the most convenient.

[caleb]

I would just like to say thats the longest message I have ever seen on this board.

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Meet my lawyer.

[caleb]

HA! I am elminster now WOOHOO!


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Meet my lawyer.

[onthepequod]

Caleb,
Believe it or not I was not going for length. I just got going. Good evening to you, it's nice to know there is someone else out there.

[onthepequod]

BTW. Congrats on your Elminster status.

[John D Harris]

My prayers will be for those childern, and for your wife and yourself that you can make a differance. As hard as it is sometimes try to remember God is still on His throne inspite of what we as humans do to each other.(not questioning your faith, offering encourgement)

[RudeDawg]

No need to apologize
We share our thoughts here, and thus build our friendships and character. Welcome to our home.

Now, in response to your post:

I was taught to look at misfortune and pray, "There, but by the grace of God, go I"

You are correct in your belief that not everyone drops down before we pull ourselves up. Some are forced, or born into difficult situations.

A tiny piece of my story is posted in a thread here, I'm not sure which, so I won't repeat it. Suffice to say, that as a child, I was dealt a hardship. By the grace of God, and the strength of family, I am alive today.

It is humbling to see what others go through. But it can also be strengthening.

make a decision to help. In your own way, be that through a formal charity or program, or by giving to a panhandler. Just help those who need it.

One day, Ghandi decided that his life as a lawyer was unfulfilling, and he saw an injustice he wanted to change. So, he changed the world. It wasn't easy, but he did it.

Jesus Christ changed the world before he died at 33, and his teachings still affect many today.

The Bible says that no man is tested beyond what he can endure. I believe that means that a person's faith can help him overcome. Those who hae faith in God, or themselves, or others, will look for hope. Those who believe in nothing lose focus.

I'm glad you were touched by the program, and I'm sure your words will touch many here. Now, don't forget that. Keep that feeling and do something with it. It makes it easier to face the difficulies of life.

Speaking as one who has overcome, and seen others do it, I believe in Charlie's strength of character. He will overcome this, and come out stronger for it.

One last thought on your post: In the USA, people need liscences to drive, but not to have children. It saddens me to see children suffer because of their parents lack of character.

oh well,
peace, joy, mischief...


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The RudeDawg
Known in these Forgotten Realms as Perin LightEyes
and my girlfriends, Pamila and Phil

[John D Harris]

And I thought this redneck was having a bad day, no need to appologize to me if my toes get stepped on they're not where they should be! It's easy to forget that others are having truly a bad day!

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[onthepequod]

John D.,
I didn't feel like you were questioning my faith, so don't worry (if you were).
Thanks for sharing your reply, I enjoyed it.

RudeDawg,
I would like to hear your story someday. But I will leave that to your discreation. As far as making a difference goes, my wife and I resolved several months ago to adopt a couple children (infants) from this type of background, after we have a few of our own. I also enjoyed your response and particularly liked your observation regarding drivers licenses.

[RudeDawg]

Originally posted by onthepequod: RudeDawg, I would like to hear your story someday. But I will leave that to your discreation. As far as making a difference goes, my wife and I resolved several months ago to adopt a couple children (infants) from this type of background, after we have a few of our own. I also enjoyed your response and particularly liked your observation regarding drivers licenses.

Short version:
As a child, at the age of five, my parents were told I would be dead by ten. Less than 2 months later, I was paralyzed from my chest down. Lived in a wheelchair for years, progressed to braces and a walker. Picked on a lot. tons of physical pain.
Family was poor, my illness broke them financially. Father worked 3 jobs to pay for my meds, my mother did the caretaking of myself and brother.

fastforward.

I'm a better person for my trials. It built character, and faith. I have a supreme self-confidence, supported by faith in God.

'nuff said.

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The RudeDawg
Known in these Forgotten Realms as Perin LightEyes
and my girlfriends, Pamila and Phil