OK. You asked for it...
Who is Jack Schitt, really? The Lineage Revealed...
Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says "you don't know Jack Schitt". So to help you handle the situation:
Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt.
Awe Schitt, a partner in Knee-deep 'n Schitt Industries, married an Irish woman named Oh O'Dear, thereafter known as Oh Schitt-O'Dear.
In turn, Jack Schitt married a lady named Noe, and the deeply religious couple produced 6 Schitt children: Holie, the twins-Deep and Dip, Fulla, Giva and Bull (a high school dropout).
After being married for 15 years, Jack and Noe divorced. Noe later married Mr. Sherlock and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous surname. However she was know as Noe Schitt-Sherlock.
Dip Schitt married Loda and they produced a cowardly son - Chicken.
Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony.
The Schitt-Happens children are Summ, Dawg, Byrd and Horse.
Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.
Now, when someone says you don't know Jack - you can correct them.
P.S. - Late word has it that Summ has left the Air Force and is now a pilot for Alaska Airlines. So, it looks like this Schitt's gonna fly forever.
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The day we stop learning is the day we start dying!(c)
*Member of the HADB clan. Mage extraordinair.
Occasional subjugate to Gwhanos the Fluffy
*
(when G is behaving)
"Allright! We'll call it a draw."
[This message has been edited by DragonMage (edited 09-23-2001).]