You are showing an INCREDIBLE amount of patience, Moridin. Been in your situation. When we did the counseling, the therapist was spot-on and knew what was going on as long as we discussed what was wrong with me, but when it was her behaviour 'issues', then the counselor was just siding with me and we didn't need to go anymore. LOLOLOL - So, if that is what is NOT going on with you two, then that is a positive sign.
My personal belief - she should cancel her trip. period. Whyever in the world is the discomfort of others to be considered more important than doing that which is rife with pain for you?????? If you are the most important person in her life, then she should SHOW that, not just pay it lip service. Like i told griever in his depression thread, people can say whatever they want, it is what they actually DO that points to their true self. Lillie had a good point about forbidding, I agree with her there. It should be presented as more of an either/or sort of thing.
Glad your weekend went well. Not talking about "us" if it leads to problems without the presence of a referee is a good idea, and it helps for the two of you to begin some good memories to put on top of the bad, fer sure.
A question - When you are talking about 'us' and the tears start, at what point are you? i.e., are you at the point where you are asking why she did it, or asking her to say she won't do it again? in other words, are you asking about HER behaviour, past or future? From what you have said, I gather that is the crux right now? good luck, and talk with you later.
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When given a choice, take both.
