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MERRY CHRISTMAS ELIF GODSON!!!!!
After searching far and wide (roughly 17" diagonal viewing area)and sparing no expense (actually got change for a nickel out of this...) I've found what I think may be a decent present for you...
A professional hockey arena of your very own, complete with a yet-to-be-named pro hockey team assembled from the first-round picks of the 2005 season!
This arena will be installed on your new hundred and fifty acre compound in beautiful hurricane-free Tennesee and will boast the latest in comfort for the fans with a 50 ft plasma screen jumbotron, fully reclining barcalounger chairs, and a bucket of assorted fish to throw at the opposing team. Due to space and comfort considerations, seating is limited to 35,000 of your closest friends.
Your personal suite will have a professionally staffed kitchen and bar at your beck and call 24-7, because when you aren't watching a hockey game, you'll be playing Dark Age of Camelot on your own dedicated server and custom-built Alienware system or running through your Judo routine in the attached gym.
The specially built Hummer-limousine Zamboni has it's own wetbar and seats nine, so you can take the family for a spin at halftime.
I had a difficult time arranging comfortable travel for you and the family, so I just settled for having the Stanley Cup playoff games held at your facility every year. Hope you don't mind the crowds...
Here's hoping you and your family have a wonderful Christmas and a very happy new year!
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