[Arvon]

Some "Senior" personal ads seen in Florida and Arizona newspapers:
(Who sez seniors don't have a sense of humor?)

FOXY LADY: Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired
beauty, 80's, slim,5'-4" (used to be 5-6), searching
for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion. Matching
white shoes and belt a plus.

LONG-TERM COMMITMENT: Recent widow who
has just buried fourth husband looking for someone
to round out a six- unit plot. Dizziness, fainting,
shortness of breath not a problem.

SERENITY NOW: I am into solitude, long walks,
sunrises, the ocean, yoga and meditation. If you
are the silent type, let's get together, take our
hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times.

WINNING SMILE: Active grandmother with
original teeth seeking a dedicated flossier to share
rare steaks, corn on the cob and caramel candy.

BEATLES OR STONES? I still like to rock,
still like to cruise in my Camaro on Saturday nights
and still like to play the air guitar. If you were a
groovy chick, or are now a groovy hen, let's get
together and listen to my boss collection of
eight-track tapes.

MEMORIES: I can usually remember Monday
through Thursday. If you can remember Friday,
Saturday and Sunday, let's put our two heads
together.

MINT CONDITION: Male, 1932, high mileage,
good condition, some hair, many new parts including
hip, knee, cornea, valves. Isn't in running condition,
but walks well.