Playing a Bard as a tank is like asking a thief to tank or a Ranger to be the spellcaster. That is so NOT the way to use a Bard - one of the best, most fun and most contributive charcters available. A good Bard is always in the thick of it, either spellcasting, using a LONGbow (as opposed to a thiefs shortbow), boosting morale/confusing the enemy, picking pockets/stealing from stores or using high charisma to positive effect when dealing with NPCs.
Oooh yeah
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I am the walrus!.... er, no hang on....
A fair dinkum laughing Hyena!