[Bardan the Slayer]

Originally posted by Aelia Jusa: quote: Originally posted by Bardan the Slayer: quote: Originally posted by Morgeruat: Mel, here in the states the average is something like 50% of marriages end in divorce within 5 years, truly a sad reflection on society as a whole.

Yeah, but sources tell me that particularly in the South, it is a faux-pas to live with someone without being married to them. If you are going to have a cultural tradition where people do not live together (which is essential to really get to know each other, IMHO) before getting married, then you will have a sky high divorce rate.

The irony is that it is mainly a religious tradition that couples do not 'live in sin', but this leads to the exact effect that the southern religions hate - divorce. They really are causing their own problems.

[/QUOTE]Actually all the studies I've read indicate that couples who live together before they get married are more likely to divorce than those that don't. The thinking is that living together without being married creates an atmosphere of casualness and non-permanence to the relationship - an easy out because the commitment is less than if they were actually married, which tends to remain even after they've got married. I see what you're saying, definitely, and that would surely be true in some cases. But the actual statistics point in the opposite direction. [/QUOTE]Yes, I've seent hose studies, but there is an interfering factor - the chances of a couple marrying before cohabiting are considerably higher if they are religiously fervent. Those are *exactly* the people who have the greatest problem with divorce, and are the most likely to stay in unhappy marriages rather than divorce. In other words, the people most likely to marry immediately are those least likely to divorce as a matter of principle.

But we're getting off topic here. If someone wants to start a new thread about this, feel free. If not - don't worry, I won't cry!