After painstaking jounalistic work I have ascertained the following information on the real life of True Moose.
True Moose is thought by most to be a Canadian born and bred. Yet in an exclusive interview I have discovered that he is really an immgrant. He is in fact a keg of German beer. When I first met him for the interview his aluminum keg was polished to a high luster, gleaming in the sunlight. He appeared to be in excellent condition with only a few dents showing. When I asked him about the dents he explained that they were the result of playing hockey. TM is quite the hockey enthusiast and optimistic about his teams play this year. He waxed elequently on their present 3 game winning streak. If TM is representative of the players on his team then they will indeed have an excellent season.
Usually when interviewing people you don't expect them to be a keg of beer. What was shocking though was the disclosure that TM is full of Heineken and not a Canadian beer. It was at this point in the interview that "Moosey", as he is known by friends, admitted he was actually an immigrant that went very well with bratwurst.
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