[SixOfSpades]

All right, let me put it this way: Apart from Intelligence, name one, just ONE, stat that is more important than Dexterity, for a Mage. He doesn't need more than 10 STR because he's not going to melee, he doesn't need WIS unless he wants Lore, and he doesn't need CHA unless he's leading the party, and what the heck would a Mage be doing at the front of the party? Yes, he should have 16 CON because he needs all the hitpoints he can get, but he also needs 18 DEX to preserve what few hitpoints he has. It's not that difficult to roll a Mage with 18 DEX, really. You try to make me sound like I've never heard of the space bar, but you're the one who seems unaware of the 'Reroll' button when building a character.
You ask (concerning whether one should give a Mage Missile weapons like Slings and Darts), "i mean really is the extra insubstantial damage worth it." Ummmm....yes. What's the alternative? Having him run up and whack at a Basilisk with his mighty Quarterstaff+1? And as for the inconsequential damage that Slings can do, it happened to be my Cleric who nailed Aec'Letec.
Okay, rant mode off. My "ideal" Mage? There's really no such thing as a "perfect" mage, but this is the guy I'm using in my current game:
Elven Mage/Thief (Levels 6/7 at the moment)
12/19/16/19/18/10 (I've given him the Tome of INT and Algernon's Cloak)
Pockets: 100% Locks: 100% Stealth: 80% (100% by the end of the game)

If not an Elven Mage/Thief, I'd use a Gnomish Cleric/Illusionist.