Well, you do realize that there are some who argue that the downside to the old "solid" form of marriage, i.e. a unempowered woman in a patriarchal religion and world with no options, was not rather a happy thing. Necessary, but not happy. Though I share some of your same concerns, I must say that many of my parents' generation that I know got a divorce because of a bad situation - one that they simply would have "toughed out" in other historical time periods. Is it better to tough it out or leave? I guess that depends on how bad it is.
Thing is, me and my wife are both professionals. We have our own lives/careers that we have developed for the 23-25 years of life before we met. Neither of us have ever had a lack of romantic interests in our lives. This means we both have options - neither of us is with the other because we "settled." Thus, every moment we are together and love each other we know that the only necessity is our shared bond. Because the world doesn't dictate our situation, it is voluntary at every moment. Because of that, we know what we have is real.
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