[The Hierophant]

Your father seems to be battling with something. Now of course I'm speaking from complete ignorance as to your family's history and current situation, but from what you've said it would seem that your father is trying to escape from getting emotionally close to you by burning any emotional bridge that might exist between you. His alcoholism and callous disrespect to you seem to show that he has some inner demons that arn't letting him face the outside world with anything less than a hostile face. He seems to be moving toward a self-fulfilling prophecy of the "Don't get too fond of people, boy. We live, and live to die." that you mentioned.

I think Mel and Johnny are onto things here, try and get some time away from home, away from the stifling environment and frustrating rejection. Get your bearings, sort out your direction. 17 is an ok age to move out. I moved out at 17, took a short while to get used to the responsibility, but I love the freedom of it now (at age 20).
Sometimes you just have to give the flames time to die down before you can start rebuilding the wreckage. And while he may or may not be willing to face whatever it is that's making him be like this, you can rest assured in the knowledge that you love your father and that you arn't willing to give up on him.