[Earthdog]

Never beat the crap out of a cop while hes on duty and has a partner with him. The partner will procede to beat you about the head and shoulders with a blunt object. As far as that goes it doesnt pay to even be smart to a cop. The Warning he was going to give you just got turned into a ticket.

Never go to the airport and tell one of the security gaurds ( after he asks whats in your bags) "Thirty-two kilos of plastic explosives"

That will go over like a lead balloon.

NEVER tell your girlfriend you think she looks good with her fingernails all black> She will immediately accuse you of slamming the car door on her hand on purpose.

Dont count on Troy Aikmen, Darrel Johnston, and Micheal Irvin to come out of retirement so the Cowboys can win another Super Bowl. Even if they came out of retirement the Cowboys wont win another one as long as Jerry Jones owns the team.

Never punt a 16 pound bowling ball. Trust me it HURTS!!!!!!!