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Thoran · 03-04-2002, 04:45 PM

quote:
Originally posted by AzRaeL StoRmBlaDe:
I'm only a lurker anymore but I felt I should comment on this thread.
The response has a good idea, but a number of holes in their theory. A partner will still cheat on you even if you do fullfill all phsyical and emotional needs for them. Some people are just apathetic, some don't think they'll get caught, and some don't even view it as wrong. There are a lot of reasons for someone to cheat and a good majority of them are not to be blamed on your partner. I mean even if you are getting urges to cheat on your signifigant other, that should be a clue to either let them know and try to work something out, or break up. There's no excuse for telling somone how much you care about them and all then, and then turning around and cheating on them

Very good post Azreal and I agree wholeheartedly. As a person who cheated on girlfriends in highschool and was cheated on by my first wife I've kindof seen both ends of the spectrum.

When I was not married I didn't put a lot of stock in being faithful to a girlfriend. I was immature and selfish and lost some good friends because of it, through no fault of their own.

My first wife simply thought she could get away with it... when I told her I wanted a divorce because of it she was shocked, she honestly thought I was overreacting. No relationship is perfect but IMO there's no excuse for cheating in a marriage. If I feel so strongly for someone else that I'm tempted to cheat then it's time for me to consider if I really should be married. I would end a relationship that I was unhappy with BEFORE getting into another. I think this is where all the excuses people come up with fall flat... if they're so unhappy then it's time for them to move on. IMO, cheating demeans the cheater much more than the partner. I have too much respect for myself to engage in such behavior.

I also don't agree about this overwhelming natural drive that will overcome all hopes to resist... it's just plain BULL (and I've got first hand experience here too [img]smile.gif[/img] , but it's fairly embarrassing so I'll spare you the details). It's a matter of respect for yourself and others... in the end I think that makes the difference between choosing to cheat and choosing to stick by the vows that you made.

03-04-2002, 04:45 PM	#24
Thoran Galvatron Join Date: January 10, 2002 Location: Upstate NY Age: 57 Posts: 2,109	quote: Originally posted by AzRaeL StoRmBlaDe: I'm only a lurker anymore but I felt I should comment on this thread. The response has a good idea, but a number of holes in their theory. A partner will still cheat on you even if you do fullfill all phsyical and emotional needs for them. Some people are just apathetic, some don't think they'll get caught, and some don't even view it as wrong. There are a lot of reasons for someone to cheat and a good majority of them are not to be blamed on your partner. I mean even if you are getting urges to cheat on your signifigant other, that should be a clue to either let them know and try to work something out, or break up. There's no excuse for telling somone how much you care about them and all then, and then turning around and cheating on them Very good post Azreal and I agree wholeheartedly. As a person who cheated on girlfriends in highschool and was cheated on by my first wife I've kindof seen both ends of the spectrum. When I was not married I didn't put a lot of stock in being faithful to a girlfriend. I was immature and selfish and lost some good friends because of it, through no fault of their own. My first wife simply thought she could get away with it... when I told her I wanted a divorce because of it she was shocked, she honestly thought I was overreacting. No relationship is perfect but IMO there's no excuse for cheating in a marriage. If I feel so strongly for someone else that I'm tempted to cheat then it's time for me to consider if I really should be married. I would end a relationship that I was unhappy with BEFORE getting into another. I think this is where all the excuses people come up with fall flat... if they're so unhappy then it's time for them to move on. IMO, cheating demeans the cheater much more than the partner. I have too much respect for myself to engage in such behavior. I also don't agree about this overwhelming natural drive that will overcome all hopes to resist... it's just plain BULL (and I've got first hand experience here too [img]smile.gif[/img] , but it's fairly embarrassing so I'll spare you the details). It's a matter of respect for yourself and others... in the end I think that makes the difference between choosing to cheat and choosing to stick by the vows that you made.