quote:
Originally posted by ʆë®Ńď†Ý:
And if you do what if b4 you get married you realise that he/she isn't the one for you and that actually what you feel isn't the right kind of love towards him/her? Would this make your intention to save yourself for your spouse any less valid because you made a very human error in judgement?
Another thing I was wondering... how do you know you're totally compatible with someone unless you make love with them before you're married? I mean what if you get married and the sexual spark just isn't there? I would not be good to get married then 10years down the line divorce. 
Also, what constitutes making love? Does it count as not saving yourself if you say, kiss someone else? Maybe explore but not actually have sexual intercourse? Or is it just the act of orgasming?
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forget what I think for now....my mother used to say: of course you never know if you are 100% sexually compatible with someone before you try it, but if you love someone enough that you want to marry them....the good chance is that they will have attracted you in the first place...physically and by character and there is only a minute chance that with a bit of ahem..."practice" you cannot become compatible physically...
So she was saying that there is no excuse for "the spark not being there." If you love someone you will find a way to love them physically and be satisfied. Also, this is why marriage should not be rushed- make sure you love the person.
About what constitutes sex? Well kissing obviously not but oral sex ....maybe I think it does. Things that can lead to sex like foreplay- I think the Bible means to include that in "not before marriage".