In my quest to cheer ppl up I feel I have to deliver some mother-in-law jokes.
3 men are back home after their holidays and are discussing which of their mother-in-laws talks the most.
- My mother-in-law - says the first - has so much to say that we didn't even bother getting a TV. I mean why? We wouldn't be able to hear it anyway.....
- That's nothing, - says the 2nd man - my mother-in-law talks so much that a while back I was on sick leave due to serious damage to my hearing.
The 3rd man remains quiet.
- And yours? - ask the other two.
- We've just come back from Tunisia.
- And??
- What do you mean "and??"? Just take a look at my mother-in-law. Her freakin' tongue's got a tan.
At law school, a student is being tested:
- What's the punishment for bigomy?
- Two mother-in-laws.
Mr Smith's mother-in-law is kicked by his horse. She dies of her injury. Many many people attend the funeral, even from the neighbouring villages.
- So many people! - exclaims Smith's friend. - Was your mother-in-law this popular?
- Don't be silly, they all came to buy the horse.
At court:
- So sir, do you admit to this act of grevious bodily harm commited against your mother-in-law?
- Yes.
- So we don't need to call her as a witness?
Assistant: - Maybe it would be a good idea to take a look at her anyway, mr lawyer sir. We could discover mitigating circumstances....
The mother-in-law is dying. She's moaning a lot as she lies in bed and suddenly her gaze is fixed on the ceiling and she says to those waiting at her bedside:
- Look, there's a spider on the ceiling!
Her son-in-law replies:
- Mother please! Concentrate on one thing at a time!
Mr. Jones' mother-in-law dies. The funeral organisers ask him:
- What sort of funeral would you like? Burial or cremation?
- Better make it both, I wanna be sure.