Draconia, I haven't read you post since it seems that you deleted it, but don't feel bad ! You have the right to your own thinking and the right to express it, and nobody will think bad of you because you do !
Cheers, sister.
Hey, my grandfather was a military, and he had kept his gun, and when we were kids, my sister and I never knew he had one and never saw it, so everything should be fine if you are careful.
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