[K T Ong]

"Greetings!" said the old Hobbit with enthusiasm. "I understand you're all here to attend Frodo Baggins' birthday party?"

"Well, uhhh..." stuttered Luke.

"Yessa, yes!" cried Ghee Ghee. "Weesa heree to attendsa Frodosa partysa!"

Gandalf walked to Luke. "Luke," he said softly, "I understand how you feel. But since we're here already, I think we might as well go. What do you say?"

Luke was silent for a moment.

"All right," he said. "Let's go."

"Great!" said the Hobbit. "This way, folks!"

**************************************************

There were lots of people at the party, which was held in the open under a huge tree. Decorative trinkets hung from the branches, and food and drink in large quantities were served. There were scones and eclairs, pineapples and durians, croissants and doughnuts, pizzas and Oreos, and large bottles of 7-up and Coca-Cola. An Elven rock band was playing Rock-and-Roll music. Elves, dwarves, Hobbits, humans, Martians, Klingons, Ewoks and Looney Tunes and Walt Disney characters talked and laughed.

Luke was helping himself to some muesli from Tatooine when a strange youth approached him. The youth had a large scar on his face and carried a curious-looking weapon which looked neither like a sword nor a gun. "Hi," he said to Luke, "I'm Squall Lionheart. Who are you?"

"I'm Luke Skywalker," replied Luke. "I'm an apprentice Jedi."

"Yeah, heard of you Jedis," said Squall. "I'd recognise one from a thousand miles away. I myself come from a special military academy, too."

"What sort of military academy is that?" asked Luke.

"You don't have to know that much," answered Squall. "Just know that the whole thing's a conspiracy brewed up by this stupid Japanese gaming company that has nothing better to do than to copy ideas from used American entertainment stuff. Frankly, I'd be ashamed to tell you of this so-called military academy -- everyone would be able to tell that it's copied from you Jedis..."