Nah, if you have a full party and talk to a character you want to join with then it'll go to the reform party screen immediately without you doing anything, and you can just pick and choose from there pretty much
Ha, usually if you attack your party members they will hit you back BUT since you technically still have control over them(they DON'T turn red)you can make them stop but you would still be attacking them, which isn't good unless you're wacko

hehe j/k...If a npc ain't in your party and you attack them i dunno what happens cos i never done it before, i don't think you get XP for killing them however so it prolly not a good idea... cool?
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Yes indeed...