MAYBE A SPOILER... but don't get your hopes up.
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Save your game and go on to the graveyard district. If you meet Bohdi and something "significant" happens to Jaheira, then you are far enough along in the romance. If nothing happens to Jaheira, then wander between areas on the world map(long distances apart) to kill time. It seems like I read that the conversations kick in about every 80 game hours or so.
Personally, I haven't made it this far with Jaheria, only with Aerie so far. Good luck!
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