My recomendation for your 'to do' list:
Planar Sphere - this is tough. you might want to wait for higher levels (chapter 6+).
Dueling Families in Trademeet - simple & quick. get it over with
De'Arnise keep - this is a time issue that will eventually resolve itself (assuming you're going back for the gold). So don't worry about it.
Meeting with Valens mistress - as far as I can tell, if you paid the Shadow Thieves this never gets 'done'
Haer'Dalis - he can wait. but if you want the better xp, do it. he's not a good npc (for my party)
Mae'Var - pretty simple. get this one over with too.
I believe you can do ALL of them before moving on to chapter 3. It's just a question of how much xp you want before chapter 3.
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