I don't know about you all, but unless I download at least two mods that cover as much area as The Darkest Day does, there's no way I'll ever be able to finish her romance. The furthest I had ever gotten was Jaheira bugging me about "How did you feel about the last battle? Angry? Bloodthirsty, perhaps??" Then I killed Jon Bon and beat SoA.
I never ran into Elminster, never got her name cleared with the Harpers, but things would go more smoothly if she would follow her (bleep)-ing banters through the Underdark like she should! But from some extensive research, there is no way for Meronia to show up unless there is romance brewing, and I mean such as right after you get ambushed by the Bandits. Other than that, I've had it happen like such one time.
I go through the Harper Stronghold and get Monty for Xzar, a polymorph later, he dies. And right, and I mean right after that happened, Meronia shows up. I thought it was a bug because I got as far as "I renounce my life as a Harper" in less than 2 days. Bugged you ask...
Could be...
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