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I had the romances patch on going into TOB which lets you have all three female romances at the same time (hey! hey!)...
Jahiera was the primary one and that one continued, but I have an elf character too and Viconia's stopped with TOB.
I think when TOB imports the saved game it might decide which, if any, you have active and then continue them on... I have gotten the impression from the romance dialogue in TOB you can no longer fudge them up so they're over. So my assumption is your romance is either on or off coming into TOB.
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