Xan, being an Enchanter, should CERTAINLY be able to memorize Sleep, as it's his own specialty school. Maybe he couldn't copy the scroll because it was already in his spellbook--are you sure he didn't simply fail his roll when he tried to write it down?
As far as 'crowd control' goes, the Enchanter sounds like what you want, and Sleep is a damn good spell against low-level enemies, like what you're facing now. Of course, later on you'll learn that the best way to control crowds is to kill them, but let's stick with the here and now.
Xan won't be able to learn important spells like Magic Missile, Stinking Cloud, and Fireball, whereas Dynaheir can't learn Sleep or another really good Enchantment/Charm spell that I can't think of at the moment.
And Dynaheir is NOT the best Mage in the game.
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Volothamp's Comeuppance
Everything you ever needed to know about the entire Baldur's Gate series......except spoilers.
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