[Cerek]

Here is the farewell address I would have liked to see Bush give:

My fellow Americans:

I'd like to say that I bring a heavy heart to this last day of my presidency, but the truth is, I couldn't be happier to be getting out of here.

Imagine this: You go to work every day, to a challenging, stressful job. You work harder in a day than most people do in a month. You're on call 24 hours a day, and bear ultimate responsibility for an enormous number of staggeringly complex projects. As if that weren't enough, you have a braying mob outside your office, who denigrate your every action, second-guess your every decision, sabatoge your work, and bad mouth you to your boss at every opportunity. The people who comprise this mob have never known a fraction of the responsibilty that rests on your shoulders, yet they are not shy in telling the world how much they hate you, how much they want to see you fired, or even dead.

These are the conditions under which I have labored for the past eight years. If you haven't guessed, the braying mob I'm talking about is the media.

I came to Washington hoping that I could change the tone of discourse, which I felt had coarsened in recent years. I promised you, and I promised myself, that I would not badmouth people, I would not be insulting or belittling. I hoped that by setting an example I might inspire others to conduct themselves with civility.

A few short months after I took office, America witnessed the most horrific attack ever visited upon her shores. This event hardened my resolve. I believed that if we were to take seriously our responsibility to prevent further attacks, that it would be critical for us to focus on policy. More than a nicety, civility would be a crucial tool in our effort to reason intelligently about the proper course of action to take. Bearing this in mind, I followed a very straightforward template in my dealings: I proposed actions, laid out my reasons for taking them, and then I followed through. Where necessary, I submitted them to Congress to be voted upon.

Apparently this was the wrong thing to do. Instead of answering civility with its like, the braying mob became ever more shrill, and ever more negative.

My friends, have you ever had a friend or co-worker who talked nothing but negativity to you all day every day? After a while, it can't help but bring you down. And my friends, this is what the braying mob did to the American People.

I will not attempt to refute every lie that's been told about me in the past eight years. They are legion. But I do ask you to consider this: If I am the tyrant I have been painted as, how is it that today, in accordance with the law, I am voluntarily leaving office, and handing the reins of power to my successor? If I were intent upon "shredding the constitution", wouldn't I have shredded the part that compels me to relinquish power? If I were intent upon "stifling dissent" how is it that not a single reporter or pundit has gone to jail?

For eight years I have held my tongue in the belief that in the best interest of our nation. Tonight I say to my adversaries, you win. Tradition dictates that as a former President, I keep my thoughts to myself. However, in recent years, Presidents Carter and Clinton have taught me that that tradition has passed. From here on out, I will be more than happy to share my thoughts on the actions of my successors.

In closing, I would like to wish President Obama all the warmth, cooperation, and respect that I received while in office, and remind him that should he need my input on anything, I'm only a phone call away - provided that he's okay with the public knowing that he called me.

Thank you, and God bless.