[Yorick]

Originally Posted by Dave_the_quack You're welcome to your opinion Cerek, but I have to disagree on your thoughts that sexuality is a learned behaviour.

Hi Dave, I have agree with Cerek. When I came out of my Mum's womb, I wasn't ready to go poking either females OR males. My sexuality DEVELOPED as I grew. There will always be nature/nurture arguments, and perhaps sexuality has elements of both. But being born with a predisposition is not the same thing as being "born homosexual".

Additionally, what about bisexuals? There's certainly choices in bisexuality.

Sexuality is developed through myriad small choices, observation/imitation, experimentation, and, as with plants and the sun, influenced by love: lack of it, where it comes from etc.

I certainly don't choose my sexuality, but I do choose not to let others dictate how I should live my life by what is inherently right or wrong in their eyes.

Well I choose to "let others dictate how I should live my life by what is inherently right or wrong in their eyes."

It's called: RELATIONSHIP. I choose to self-limit myself and change aspects of my behaviour so that my significant other is not hurt. We constantly live by other's dictates if we choose to live in community. What you're suggesting is that you are an island. Alone in the world, doing what you please regardless of who it hurts or inconveniences.

I also disagree when you say that sexual desires and impulses can be controlled by adults - unless by the term 'control' you mean whether or not you act on them.

Controlling desire is something that people in committed relationships do all the time. It involves not acting on them yes, but it more importantly involves NOT ENTERTAINING A THOUGHT. It is choosing to direct ones focus.

On a smaller level, we may do it with food. I became a vegetarian because eating meat what hazardous to my health. I changed my desire to the point where, through association, meat now seems distasteful and boring to me.

Similarly I am now married. I had to change my "radar" so to speak to mentally stop the way I was thinking if I were to have any hope of changing my actions.

It's a proven fact that we can control our subconscious rather than be controlled by it, and at the mercy of any shift in fancy, feeling or emotion. Actors who "fall in love" with their leading ladies is further evidence of this, as what they are speaking and acting influences how they are perceiving and feeling reality.

In short, if you say "i love you" enough times, and act like you love a person, feelings grow. Like a "little engine that could" situation.

Commitment in relationships proves we have control over the direction of our desire.

Having said that, I'm still not sure where you're trying to go with this comment. Is is that homosexuals choose to be gay and don't have to be because there is another option? Seeing as how I have absolutely no attraction to females in the slightest that option for me could only be celibacy, and to me that just simply isn't an option. I think most people would agree you cannot control those of whom you have a sexual and emotional attraction towards. One doesn't choose to fall in love, it just happens. If it's forced it's not love.

Love, true love involves choice Dave. The "feeling" of love (infatuation) comes and goes in a relationship. Sometimes strong, sometimes gone altogether, then back again. But true love has choice. True love is what allows you to choose to forgive a person, to open your heart to the possibility of the feeling of love growing.